The Crap We Missed – Thursday 3.31.11

March 31st, 2011 // 387 Comments

Even though it feels like we’ve hit everything from Ewoks to dick gummies, here’s today’s The Crap We Missed: John Mayer is a Colombian drug lord now. Wonder Woman is winning over fanboys one awkward, boner-in-her-thigh hug at a time. Hilary Swank apparently saw those Christina Hendricks pics, too. Kevin Spacey imagines the soft, delicate breeze of a well-placed teabag, and Mikhail Gorbachev looked this after seeing this.

In Russia the miss craps you,

- The Superficial

Click Here to Start The Gallery

Photos: Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Bucky Barnes
    Commented on this photo:

    “Will somebody please tell me when my ass is all the way out of the car so I can close the door?”

  2. Mischa Barton
    Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    LOOK AT THAT FAT ASS!

  3. Jessica Szhor
    Commented on this photo:

    So we’re just doing “person on the street” photos now?

  4. Kevin Spacey
    mags
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s really topical is that his entire face looks like one big, puckery anus.

  5. Sharon Stone
    Bucky Barnes
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m old as fuck but I’m still hotter than Goldie Hawn, so THERE!”

  6. Hilary Swank
    GeorgeWBush
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice to see she’s reaching out to the LGBT community

  7. Mikhail Gorbachev
    Bucky Barnes
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m old as fuck but I’m still hotter than Goldie Hawn and Sharon Stone… so THERE!”

  8. Adrianne Palicki Wonder Woman
    Commented on this photo:

    You can all shut the hell up, SHE asked ME to take a picture with HER because she knows I have wicked nunchuck skills.

  9. Ellen Pompeo
    Mandi
    Commented on this photo:

    There is nothing right about this picture. Not one thing.

  10. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s been riding that thing since California. He’s like a giant, musclebound Forrest Gump on wheels, if Forrest’s dad had been a Nazi.

  11. Kirsten Dunst
    Commented on this photo:

    First Lindsay, now Kristen…does everyone in Hollywood look like McCaulay Culkin under their makeup?

  12. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugh, that color!

  13. Adrianne Palicki Wonder Woman
    Bucky Barnes
    Commented on this photo:

    Adrianne: “Does this Hobbit make my ass look fat?”

  14. Ian McShane
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t care what he looks like. He’s sexy as long as his voice holds out.

  15. Mikhail Gorbachev
    Commented on this photo:

    Gorbachev, nostalgic for the old days of the Soviet Union, waited in line for over 7 hours to get into his own birthday party.

  16. That Guy

    In Russia, the crap misses you.

    FTFY

  17. Mikhail Gorbachev
    Commented on this photo:

    he saw Sarah Palin from his house, too bad his aim isn’t what it used to be…

  18. Hilary Swank
    Commented on this photo:

    “I am using my invisible crystal ball. And it tells me my tits are spectacular”

  19. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    That Guy
    Commented on this photo:

    The Kim Jong Il comments make me laugh because Arnold is doing a perfect impression sans the thumbs-up.

  20. Kim Kardashian
    Commented on this photo:

    seeing pics of Snooki in a bikini even makes Kim ready to loose her lunch.

  21. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Commented on this photo:

    after getting disgusted with her roles in the acting industry. Jennifer Love Hewitt is now becoming a full figured Statue of Liberty performer in NYC.

  22. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Your Gynecologist
    Commented on this photo:

    Just get a bunch of cats and get it over with.

  23. Kirsten Dunst
    Commented on this photo:

    “keep away from me. one false move and i will give you a blow job.”

  24. Jessica Szhor
    Satan's bitch
    Commented on this photo:

    WHO?

  25. Sharon Stone
    Commented on this photo:

    Well at least she didn’t show an upskirt shot.

  26. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Satan's bitch
    Commented on this photo:

    “What? I’m in my robe again?! Oh, silly silly silly me.”

  27. Mischa Barton
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like yet another awesome party fashion event.
    Stoned as hell, but not bad. That dress looks like a decent ass disguise.

  28. Marilyn Manson
    Arzach
    Commented on this photo:

    Lady Gaga looks pale

  29. Matt LeBlanc
    Daemon8666
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like he ate all the king’s men then picked his teeth with Lisa Kudrow.

  30. Hilary Swank
    Daemon8666
    Commented on this photo:

    2 + 1 = CLOP CLOP CLOP

  31. Goldie Hawn
    dumplesthesheep
    Commented on this photo:

    Ahhhhh-CHOO!

  32. Kevin Spacey
    Daemon8666
    Commented on this photo:

    Did Berlusconi switch to male hookers or something?

  33. Kevin Spacey
    youcandieNOW
    Commented on this photo:

    You’d think a guy that old and experienced would know that you don’t actually blow on it.

  34. Mischa Barton
    Daemon8666
    Commented on this photo:

    “No honey, we said you COULD look hot in a burlap sack, not that you should try it!”

  35. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone should pay her to wear sunglasses.

  36. Goldie Hawn
    Daemon8666
    Commented on this photo:

    Is her girdle squeezing her stomach into her brain?

  37. Mischa Barton
    Your Gynecologist
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that her mini-van?

  38. Ellen Pompeo
    Daemon8666
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know Kirsten Dunst had Downs.

  39. Sharon Stone
    Arzach
    Commented on this photo:

    For a woman her age she looks great, that’s why I don’t date women her age.

  40. Mikhail Gorbachev
    Arzach
    Commented on this photo:

    is that a map of Florida?

    • Bucky Barnes

      Well spotted, that is indeed a map of Florida. How humiliating it must be for a former Soviet leader to have a picture of Amerca’s whang prominently displayed on his noggin.

  41. Marilyn Manson
    widget
    Commented on this photo:

    Who drinks V8 splash in a wine glass?

  42. Ian McShane
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    This scared me.

  43. Marilyn Manson
    Daemon8666
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s a European cigarette and a trip to Cleo’s away from hipsterhood.

    • The Critical Crassness

      He couldn’t be hip if he had an army of gay European fashion designers and makeup artists working 24/7 for the next year. All he would succeed in being is more ridiculous than he already is….which frankly seems like an impossible mission.

  44. Jessica Szhor
    Daemon8666
    Commented on this photo:

    Tits or GTFO

  45. Sharon Stone
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Kudos for effort & staying tight.
    The dress is a little ridiculous. How old is she, 60?

  46. Mischa Barton
    hello
    Commented on this photo:

    Funny Farm Couture.

  47. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    youcandieNOW
    Commented on this photo:

    Please tell me she’s playing a pioneer woman in a made for TV movie and she’s still in costume.

  48. Mikhail Gorbachev
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    This man changed the world. I won’t dis Gorby.

    • If by “changed the world” you mean ” was bent over and assfucked by Ronald Regan” then yes, he did. I guess he had the last laugh though, what with still being alive and all.

  49. Adrianne Palicki Wonder Woman
    Daemon8666
    Commented on this photo:

    Careful, things didn’t go so well for the last girl Fred Durst took pictures with.

  50. Kim Kardashian
    hello
    Commented on this photo:

    She had some of the same stuff Kevin Spacey had.

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