Even though it feels like we’ve hit everything from Ewoks to dick gummies, here’s today’s The Crap We Missed: John Mayer is a Colombian drug lord now. Wonder Woman is winning over fanboys one awkward, boner-in-her-thigh hug at a time. Hilary Swank apparently saw those Christina Hendricks pics, too. Kevin Spacey imagines the soft, delicate breeze of a well-placed teabag, and Mikhail Gorbachev looked this after seeing this.
In Russia the miss craps you,
- The Superficial
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Photos: Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Didn’t she just give birth, like, yesterday? Damn.
yep the third vs chick in here in a day whose body snapped right back into place. surprised she’s not being compared to a 12 yo boy, who btw if one looked like this i’d turn bi
Joey, why you no laughing?
maybe cuz he’s fat and unemployed?
and divorced
if I made millions off Friends re-runs, I’d be fat and unemployed, too.
McFeely you’re wrong on this one. He has ….how should I put it? A shit load of money…and he’s starring in his own hit tv show now. Episodes…and it’s just got great reviews and a new season coming up. I just think he just doesn’t give a fuck anymore…Which is a great thing to do if I may add.
I would ruin her.
I think I just ruined my keyboard.
“One time this MAN actually hit on me, so I put my hands around his throat, like this, and popped his fucking head off.”
“Deck the harrs with berrs of HAHRRY, fa ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra”
Oh I get it, an Asian joke. Clever.
(not really)
Ohhhh, you’re a sharp one!
They should call her Mirada Brrrr…because that’s the noise I’d make between her boobs.
LOLz
Whoa…sad Keanu has serious competition.
I. was just. thinking that.
Does anyone else read her name as “Jessica’s-a-whore”?
Does this car door make my ass look big?
If I were a T-rex, this is what my arms would look like…
Spill some cranberry juice on his forehead and he IS Mikhail Gorbachev.
Lots has been spilled on Kevin’s forehead; none of it was cranberry juice.
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
Oh that’s cute…for Gorbachev’s birthday, Kevin is doing his Lenin impression (glass coffin version)
Joey doesn’t share food!
There’s my blow up doll!!
Yummmmm, I want her fat ass in my face
Cute…Goldie is doing her Lenin impression too!
God, if she looks this hammered arriving for the party she must have hit “Lohan” by the time it was over.
My name is William Kidd, as I sailed, as I sailed/My name is William Kidd, as I sailed/ My name is William Kidd, God’s laws I did forbid/ And most wickedly I did, as I sailed, as I sailed…
…Oh, I murdered William Moore, as I sailed, as I sailed/ I murdered William Moore, as I sailed/ I murdered William Moore and I left him in his gore/ Many leagues from shore, as I sailed, as I sailed
Oh, I steered from sound to sound, as I sailed, as I sailed/Oh I steered from sound to sound, as I sailed/ I steered from sound to sound, and many ships I found/And all of them I burned as I sailed, as I sailed…
I just realized he looks like a goth Pee Wee Herman.
yes, yes Kim…we’ve all seen your movie.
Did he have lunch or did lunch have him???
You blinked!! You lose!
Assuming it’s a stab at Asians, it’s You Brink, You Ruse, dipshit.
How is that a stab at Asians, dipshit?
Try harder, dipshit.
are there piranha at her gym?
As Kim Jong-Il waits patiently for his turn.
LMAO
A winnar, it’s you
+1
What the hell is Kim Jong Il doing in the background?
Actually looks more like a young svelte Mao.
Is…is he eating a bra?
Kim Jong il is apparently also a photobomber.
I bet she’s tighter than a snare drum. (I assume she preserved her godly temple and ripped that baby out of an incision)
She has money and a “team”, you bet your ass her body will look just as good after :P
She did the whole thing “oh Nacher-al”. No drugs. And the kid was like 9lbs too!
She looks like … naaah. too easy.
Afterwords, he was quoted as saying “wonder what? who? I don’t know what you’re talking about, did you see the fake titties on that skank??”
Little did the young Japanese boy, Nagitito, realize, just how serious the fallout was until he awoke from bed that morning…
I’ll be back!
Because Kim Jong Il is waiting for his turn…
Love those szhorts szhe’s wearing.
I should have learned to play the guitar.
Is this one of the deckmates from Deadliest Catch?
You’re kidding me right?
They’re remaking the movie “Blow” already??
Jennifer Love Hewjass nees to stop getting photographed from any angle than the front…and above the neck…and below the waste…yes, I know what I wrote and I mean it.
Start the party! The tranny hooker has arrived!!! Yippeeeeeeeeee
They invited Christina Aguilera?
What a drag it is getting old. She’s looking very Faye Dunaway-ish.
pucker up! I’mma comin’ in for the kiss xxxx
Mick Jagger has fantastic tits.
in other news, Kate Hudson found out just what, exactly, it meant to be used and abused by A-Rod.
Man, Mike Isabella is taking the Top Chef loss pretty hard.
[witty, yet obvious Kim Jong Il reference]
lol nice
“My ears, like… used to be here, till I sold em for some uh, weed”
Who the fuck is this guy? Was he in KISS?
Deadwood. Watch it.
That’s a post anal penetration glow if I’ve ever seen one.
+1
does she have cancer, or is she just getting uglier?
Actually she looks somewhat closer to normal than usual….which of course isn’t really saying much when you normally look like Gholum.
Yeah. She has fucking face cancer.
Johnny Depp is going to be pissed about the break in.
He’s juuuust shy of hitting his head on the ceiling….
You! You don’t know what it’s like to commune with the Dark Lord, to live with evil, to see the world for the giant pus-filled cesspool that it… hey, don’t spill my Bellini!!