The Crap We Missed – Thursday 3.31.11

March 31st, 2011 // 387 Comments

Even though it feels like we’ve hit everything from Ewoks to dick gummies, here’s today’s The Crap We Missed: John Mayer is a Colombian drug lord now. Wonder Woman is winning over fanboys one awkward, boner-in-her-thigh hug at a time. Hilary Swank apparently saw those Christina Hendricks pics, too. Kevin Spacey imagines the soft, delicate breeze of a well-placed teabag, and Mikhail Gorbachev looked this after seeing this.

In Russia the miss craps you,

- The Superficial

Click Here to Start The Gallery

Photos: Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Miranda Kerr
    Jill_Ess
    Commented on this photo:

    Didn’t she just give birth, like, yesterday? Damn.

    • yep the third vs chick in here in a day whose body snapped right back into place. surprised she’s not being compared to a 12 yo boy, who btw if one looked like this i’d turn bi

  2. Matt LeBlanc
    Haddo01
    Commented on this photo:

    Joey, why you no laughing?

  3. I would ruin her.

  4. Hilary Swank
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “One time this MAN actually hit on me, so I put my hands around his throat, like this, and popped his fucking head off.”

  5. Kevin Spacey
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “Deck the harrs with berrs of HAHRRY, fa ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra”

  6. Miranda Kerr
    Commented on this photo:

    They should call her Mirada Brrrr…because that’s the noise I’d make between her boobs.

  7. Matt LeBlanc
    Commented on this photo:

    Whoa…sad Keanu has serious competition.

  8. Jessica Szhor
    Commented on this photo:

    Does anyone else read her name as “Jessica’s-a-whore”?

  9. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Does this car door make my ass look big?

  10. Hilary Swank
    Commented on this photo:

    If I were a T-rex, this is what my arms would look like…

  11. Kevin Spacey
    Commented on this photo:

    Spill some cranberry juice on his forehead and he IS Mikhail Gorbachev.

  12. Kevin Spacey
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh that’s cute…for Gorbachev’s birthday, Kevin is doing his Lenin impression (glass coffin version)

  13. Matt LeBlanc
    Commented on this photo:

    Joey doesn’t share food!

  14. Kim Kardashian
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s my blow up doll!!

  15. Goldie Hawn
    Commented on this photo:

    Cute…Goldie is doing her Lenin impression too!

  16. Mischa Barton
    Matty
    Commented on this photo:

    God, if she looks this hammered arriving for the party she must have hit “Lohan” by the time it was over.

  17. Ian McShane
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    My name is William Kidd, as I sailed, as I sailed/My name is William Kidd, as I sailed/ My name is William Kidd, God’s laws I did forbid/ And most wickedly I did, as I sailed, as I sailed…

    …Oh, I murdered William Moore, as I sailed, as I sailed/ I murdered William Moore, as I sailed/ I murdered William Moore and I left him in his gore/ Many leagues from shore, as I sailed, as I sailed

    Oh, I steered from sound to sound, as I sailed, as I sailed/Oh I steered from sound to sound, as I sailed/ I steered from sound to sound, and many ships I found/And all of them I burned as I sailed, as I sailed…

  18. Marilyn Manson
    Commented on this photo:

    I just realized he looks like a goth Pee Wee Herman.

  19. Kim Kardashian
    Commented on this photo:

    yes, yes Kim…we’ve all seen your movie.

  20. Matt LeBlanc
    Zombie Kitty
    Commented on this photo:

    Did he have lunch or did lunch have him???

  21. Kevin Spacey
    HateYerFace
    Commented on this photo:

    You blinked!! You lose!

  22. Ellen Pompeo
    Commented on this photo:

    are there piranha at her gym?

  23. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Nooken
    Commented on this photo:

    As Kim Jong-Il waits patiently for his turn.

  24. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Commented on this photo:

    What the hell is Kim Jong Il doing in the background?

  25. Marilyn Manson
    Commented on this photo:

    Is…is he eating a bra?

  26. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    IRockSoxOff
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim Jong il is apparently also a photobomber.

  27. Miranda Kerr
    polk
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet she’s tighter than a snare drum. (I assume she preserved her godly temple and ripped that baby out of an incision)

  28. Kim Kardashian
    Snooki's Taint
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like … naaah. too easy.

  29. Adrianne Palicki Wonder Woman
    Commented on this photo:

    Afterwords, he was quoted as saying “wonder what? who? I don’t know what you’re talking about, did you see the fake titties on that skank??”

  30. Mikhail Gorbachev
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Little did the young Japanese boy, Nagitito, realize, just how serious the fallout was until he awoke from bed that morning…

  31. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll be back!

    Because Kim Jong Il is waiting for his turn…

  32. Jessica Szhor
    Commented on this photo:

    Love those szhorts szhe’s wearing.

  33. John Mayer
    polk
    Commented on this photo:

    I should have learned to play the guitar.

  34. Ian McShane
    polk
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this one of the deckmates from Deadliest Catch?

  35. John Mayer
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    They’re remaking the movie “Blow” already??

  36. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Commented on this photo:

    Jennifer Love Hewjass nees to stop getting photographed from any angle than the front…and above the neck…and below the waste…yes, I know what I wrote and I mean it.

  37. Sharon Stone
    Zombie Kitty
    Commented on this photo:

    Start the party! The tranny hooker has arrived!!! Yippeeeeeeeeee

  38. Sharon Stone
    polk
    Commented on this photo:

    What a drag it is getting old. She’s looking very Faye Dunaway-ish.

  39. Kevin Spacey
    annie from fremantle
    Commented on this photo:

    pucker up! I’mma comin’ in for the kiss xxxx

  40. Hilary Swank
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    Mick Jagger has fantastic tits.

  41. Goldie Hawn
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    in other news, Kate Hudson found out just what, exactly, it meant to be used and abused by A-Rod.

  42. Matt LeBlanc
    LongTimeListener, FirstTimeCaller
    Commented on this photo:

    Man, Mike Isabella is taking the Top Chef loss pretty hard.

  43. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Commented on this photo:

    [witty, yet obvious Kim Jong Il reference]

  44. Mischa Barton
    annie from fremantle
    Commented on this photo:

    “My ears, like… used to be here, till I sold em for some uh, weed”

  45. Ian McShane
    Commented on this photo:

    Who the fuck is this guy? Was he in KISS?

  46. Kevin Spacey
    Storm
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s a post anal penetration glow if I’ve ever seen one.

  47. Kirsten Dunst
    Commented on this photo:

    does she have cancer, or is she just getting uglier?

  48. John Mayer
    Commented on this photo:

    Johnny Depp is going to be pissed about the break in.

  49. John Mayer
    annie from fremantle
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s juuuust shy of hitting his head on the ceiling….

  50. Marilyn Manson
    LongTimeListener, FirstTimeCaller
    Commented on this photo:

    You! You don’t know what it’s like to commune with the Dark Lord, to live with evil, to see the world for the giant pus-filled cesspool that it… hey, don’t spill my Bellini!!

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