The Crap We Missed – Thursday 3.29.12

March 29th, 2012 // 520 Comments

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed where we officially declare Maria Menounos‘s ass the winner of Dancing With The Stars and that goes for every season here on out. We’ve also got Emile Hirsch on his way to full-blown Shia, as well as The Rock and John Cena reacting to what I can only assume is Torrie Wilson doing toe-touches.

Chin up boys, two Hail Mary’s and an Our Father and you’ll forget all about it, is something my priest used to say,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Steven Tyler Scarf Goggles Motorcycle
    Commented on this photo:

    Only cripples and three year-olds ride trikes.

  2. Tara Reid Cleavage American Reunion
    Commented on this photo:

    What the? How is she looking so good lately?

  3. Pauly D Gold Chain
    Commented on this photo:

    Just occurred to him he might be the father of Snooki’s baby…

  4. Charlie Sheen Missing Teeth The Today Show
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like a wacky cadaver.

  5. Chris Klein Thomas Ian Nicholas Weird Makeup American Reunion
    Commented on this photo:

    Flash-activated concealer.

  6. Candice Swanepoel Miranda Kerr Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    I almost fainted upon first seeing this. It’s almost too much hotness for one picture.

  7. Katherine Heigl Josh Kelley
    electricgrl
    Commented on this photo:

    Yep, he smells as bad as he looks

  8. Elizabeth Berkley Pregnant Stretch Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Ahhh the ol’ “Suck in the camel toe by singing” move… Well played Jesse Spano…

  9. Bruce Jenner
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s like the portrait of Dorian Gray. Every time a picture of a Kardashian is photoshopped, he looks a year more miserable.

  10. Sarah Jessica Parker
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this the new undead mount in World of Warcraft?

  11. Pauly D Gold Chain
    Rapsutin's Evil Twin
    Commented on this photo:

    This is the herpes virus, mgnified 400,000 times. If that doesn’t sell you on safe sex, nothing will.

  12. Tara Reid Cleavage American Reunion
    Commented on this photo:

    “See guys!! I TOLD you! I told you there was a Big Lebowski sequel! And they all said I was lying.”

  13. Elizabeth Berkley Pregnant Stretch Pants
    electricgrl
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m a dancer!

  14. George Lucas
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yes. This is the face Hayden Christensen was making right before he got the part.”

  15. Katherine Heigl Josh Kelley
    Commented on this photo:

    She doesn’t mind the affection. The look on her face is because he snotted in her ear.

  16. Emile Hirsch Puffy Jacket Sunglasses Hat Scruffy Beard
    Isa
    Commented on this photo:

    I love him

  17. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Pants DWTS
    Do_Freebird
    Commented on this photo:

    “Once I had dreams of being an actress, or a reporter, or journalist. Then I realized it was just easier to have a great ass. Ah America, the land of opportunity, as long as you have bitching gluts and no shame.”

  18. Pauly D Gold Chain
    Commented on this photo:

    Am I the only one thinking of a troll doll here?

  19. Pauly D Gold Chain
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    A downloader is a viewer who has been mugged by reality tv

  20. Charlie Sheen Missing Teeth The Today Show
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yeah, I can’t believe anyone wants to talk to me either.”

  21. George Lucas
    Tobes of Hades
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey George, give us your best Wookie Hoth Moan!”

  22. Katherine Heigl Josh Kelley
    Do_Freebird
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s married? Poor mother fucker.

  23. Elizabeth Berkley Pregnant Stretch Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hurry up and bring the car around so I can eat all this food. I’M STARVING!!!!”

  24. Robert Downey Jr. Bowler Hat
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    So, is he playing Mickey in the Rocky remake or is this just a horrible fashion choice?

  25. The Rock
    electricgrl
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like he just smelt what The Rock is cookin’

  26. Pauly D Gold Chain
    Jiminy Cryptic
    Commented on this photo:

    Nope, not gay at all…….

  27. Gerard Butler Pink Hat
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, dude! Nice pink hat!

    *cough*

  28. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Pants DWTS
    blahblahblah
    Commented on this photo:

    dudes, SERIOUSLY!?!? WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO START SUPPORTING CHROME?!?!

  29. Katherine Heigl Josh Kelley
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    The insurance company has already warned him that if he gets his lips frozen to that again, they’re not covering it.

  30. Pamela Anderson No Pants Button Down Shirt
    Rapsutin's Evil Twin
    Commented on this photo:

    Any chance she and Betheny Frankel shop for new boobs and body parts at the same factory?

  31. Pink Middle Finger
    Do_Freebird
    Commented on this photo:

    Pete Wentz has gone to hell since Ashley Simpson dumped him.

  32. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Pants DWTS
    Commented on this photo:

    Look at the shitter on that critter!

  33. The Rock
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    CAN YOU SMELL WHAT’S EATING THE ROCK’S BODY FROM THE INSIDE OUT?

  34. John Cena
    Commented on this photo:

    Apparently rising above hate requires you to turn into a woosy..

  35. Gwen Stefani Butt Tight Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Pippa?!?

  36. Bruce Jenner
    Rapsutin's Evil Twin
    Commented on this photo:

    You mean that’s not Paul McCartney?

    • Jill

      Funny how being married to a soulless, money-grubbing whore creates the same sad expression on every man’s face.

  37. Charlie Sheen Missing Teeth The Today Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Tim Burton should hire him and Courtney Love for his next movie…

  38. Pauly D Gold Chain
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he having his head glazed in Polyurethane now?

  39. Sarah Jessica Parker
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    Winter is coming.

  40. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Pants DWTS
    Blech
    Commented on this photo:

    “He needs to work-out more, eh? EH? Eh.”

  41. Seal Gold Shoes
    electricgrl
    Commented on this photo:

    Morpheus on his way to a construction job?

  42. Steven Tyler Scarf Goggles Motorcycle
    Rapsutin's Evil Twin
    Commented on this photo:

    Joan Rivers, what are you doing?

  43. Charlie Sheen Missing Teeth The Today Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Want to make a cheap horror movie? Take Charlie Sheen and Sarah Jessica Parker and you can fire the makeup artist and the special effects planer

  44. Robert Downey Jr. Bowler Hat
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Did anybody notice that forrest gump / steve canyon / douche nozzle / etc disappeared after fish called him out as RDJ?

  45. Katherine Heigl Josh Kelley
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m sick of looking at that zit under your ear…wait, I’ll get it.”

  46. Charlie Sheen Missing Teeth The Today Show
    Commented on this photo:

    They cast the wrong guy to play Barnabas Collins.

  47. Katherine Heigl Josh Kelley
    Blech
    Commented on this photo:

    I think what she’s trying to tell us all here is… that she’s already done moisturized her face. No need to grease it any more…

  48. Bethenny Frankel Cleavage Miniskirt
    Blech
    Commented on this photo:

    “Four push-up bras! That’s how many…”

  49. Elizabeth Berkley Pregnant Stretch Pants
    Blech
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty sure her camel toe is trying to eat her Chinese take-out.

  50. Sarah Jessica Parker
    Do_Freebird
    Commented on this photo:

    Believe me, I’m 61 years old. We all look more or less like that. And don’t any of you young punks think for a moment you’re going to get away with not looking like us. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHhahhahahaha.
    Jess however, is an extreme case. Even I admit that.

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