Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed where we officially declare Maria Menounos‘s ass the winner of Dancing With The Stars and that goes for every season here on out. We’ve also got Emile Hirsch on his way to full-blown Shia, as well as The Rock and John Cena reacting to what I can only assume is Torrie Wilson doing toe-touches.
Chin up boys, two Hail Mary’s and an Our Father and you’ll forget all about it, is something my priest used to say,
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Only cripples and three year-olds ride trikes.
What the? How is she looking so good lately?
It’s the power of actually wearing a bra
Just occurred to him he might be the father of Snooki’s baby…
He looks like a wacky cadaver.
That’s disrespectful to whacky cadavers.
BEETLEJUICE! BEETLEJUICE! BEETLEJUICE! It’s not working!
Flash-activated concealer.
I almost fainted upon first seeing this. It’s almost too much hotness for one picture.
Yep, he smells as bad as he looks
Ahhh the ol’ “Suck in the camel toe by singing” move… Well played Jesse Spano…
He’s like the portrait of Dorian Gray. Every time a picture of a Kardashian is photoshopped, he looks a year more miserable.
Is this the new undead mount in World of Warcraft?
This is the herpes virus, mgnified 400,000 times. If that doesn’t sell you on safe sex, nothing will.
“See guys!! I TOLD you! I told you there was a Big Lebowski sequel! And they all said I was lying.”
I’m a dancer!
“Yes. This is the face Hayden Christensen was making right before he got the part.”
She doesn’t mind the affection. The look on her face is because he snotted in her ear.
I love him
“Once I had dreams of being an actress, or a reporter, or journalist. Then I realized it was just easier to have a great ass. Ah America, the land of opportunity, as long as you have bitching gluts and no shame.”
Am I the only one thinking of a troll doll here?
yeah, that was the first thing I thought he had buried up his ass.
A downloader is a viewer who has been mugged by reality tv
“Yeah, I can’t believe anyone wants to talk to me either.”
“Hey George, give us your best Wookie Hoth Moan!”
…lit by flickering TORCH light…
She’s married? Poor mother fucker.
“Hurry up and bring the car around so I can eat all this food. I’M STARVING!!!!”
So, is he playing Mickey in the Rocky remake or is this just a horrible fashion choice?
Looks like he just smelt what The Rock is cookin’
Nope, not gay at all…….
Hey, dude! Nice pink hat!
*cough*
You buy a hat like that, I’ll bet you get a free bag of coke. (It looks good on you, though.)
dudes, SERIOUSLY!?!? WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO START SUPPORTING CHROME?!?!
The insurance company has already warned him that if he gets his lips frozen to that again, they’re not covering it.
Any chance she and Betheny Frankel shop for new boobs and body parts at the same factory?
Pete Wentz has gone to hell since Ashley Simpson dumped him.
Look at the shitter on that critter!
CAN YOU SMELL WHAT’S EATING THE ROCK’S BODY FROM THE INSIDE OUT?
Apparently rising above hate requires you to turn into a woosy..
Pippa?!?
You mean that’s not Paul McCartney?
Funny how being married to a soulless, money-grubbing whore creates the same sad expression on every man’s face.
Tim Burton should hire him and Courtney Love for his next movie…
I thought they were the same person…
Is he having his head glazed in Polyurethane now?
Winter is coming.
“He needs to work-out more, eh? EH? Eh.”
Morpheus on his way to a construction job?
Joan Rivers, what are you doing?
Want to make a cheap horror movie? Take Charlie Sheen and Sarah Jessica Parker and you can fire the makeup artist and the special effects planer
Did anybody notice that forrest gump / steve canyon / douche nozzle / etc disappeared after fish called him out as RDJ?
I thought Enty was fake RDJing?
My theory is that the government of the Netherlands immediately hunted him down and had him beaten to death with a pair of wooden shoes. You make the Dutch look douchier than Mike Myers did in Goldmember and they will fucking make you pay.
My theory is that forrest is the jerk who goes through the site and “thumbs down” nearly every post.
In the Kirk Douglas rape post, he did write this line:
“Money is just money in the end folks,”
“I’m sick of looking at that zit under your ear…wait, I’ll get it.”
They cast the wrong guy to play Barnabas Collins.
I think what she’s trying to tell us all here is… that she’s already done moisturized her face. No need to grease it any more…
“Four push-up bras! That’s how many…”
Pretty sure her camel toe is trying to eat her Chinese take-out.
Believe me, I’m 61 years old. We all look more or less like that. And don’t any of you young punks think for a moment you’re going to get away with not looking like us. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHhahhahahaha.
Jess however, is an extreme case. Even I admit that.
Us as in the fucking undead?
Holy Shit! You know how to use a computer?!?!
I’m 63 and I don’t look anything like that!
STFU as this bastard child of john elway and twiggy is still being marketed as a babe. It’s fail.
you might be 61, but she’s 47….