The Crap We Missed – Thursday 3.13.14

March 13th, 2014 // 405 Comments

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed brought to you by The Moscow Twist™ – A sure-fire coercive tactic for when your prostitute demands more cash and/or won’t stop screaming in Russian. Today’s collection is another good one and not just because we reveal that Mr. T not only has a son, but he’s been Brother Mouzone this whole time.

I’d go on, but you probably have a bunch of cloroxing and scraping your brain pieces off the wall from that, so we’ll reconvene tomorrow,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Ireland Baldwin Purple Hair Driving Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    Vanilla Ice and Kelly Osbourne take Don Cheadle for a ride.

  2. Kim Kardashian Huge Ass Chain Dress Kourtney Kardashian DASH Miami Store Grand Opening
    frankie
    Commented on this photo:

    How is even possible that they can open another store? I mean who is buying their “clothing”?

  3. Joey Lauren Adams Crazy Face Veronica Mars Premiere
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m going to go curl myself into a fetal position and watch Empire Records now.

  4. Joanna Krupa Topless Sideboob Randall Slavin Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m not sure if I’m more tired of dis how chicken or just this famewhoring bitch in general.

  5. Kermit The Frog Michelle Obama Muppets Most Wanted Screening
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s not easy being black.

  6. Earvin Johnson III Fur Collar Cheetah Slippers
    Commented on this photo:

    Tyler Perry’s “Tyler Perry Goes Shopping”

  7. Earvin Johnson III Fur Collar Cheetah Slippers
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    I met a spirit medium that looked like this once.

  8. Prince Charles Carly Williams Young Achiever Of The Year Award Princes Trust & Samsung Celebrate Success Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “As I understand it, young lady, some time ago you gave Mr. Clinton . . . let’s call it ‘a good time.’ Am I wrong in this particular matter, or shall we continue our evening with cigar shopping?”

  9. Bridget Marquardt Legs Cleavage Minidress Style Fashion Week LA Live Event Deck Day 4
    Commented on this photo:

    Who?

  10. Fran Drescher Pale Face
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    In the mirror universe, this is Morgan Freeman.

  11. Mickey Rourke Camo Jacket
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    No, I’m pretty sure that’s Eminem in a Looper-type situation.

  12. David Faustino Riding On Shopping Cart
    Commented on this photo:

    Kelly: Go get him, Cart Rider B.
    Peggy: Don’t cha mean Court Jester B?
    Kelly: I thought it was Dust Buster B.
    (Kelly and Peggy laugh)
    Al Bundy: Don’t you people realize your petty insults are eroding my son’s confidence?
    Bud: Thanks dad. By the way, I quit my job.
    Al: Bud, You useless son of Women from Wanker.

  13. Scout Willis Huge Jaw Only Lovers Left Alive Screening
    Commented on this photo:

    Can’t wait for the Willis family biography: A Chin Runs Through it

  14. Jamie Lynn Spears Fat Weight Gain Legs Miniskirt Rubber Boots Mother Lynne Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    “Bertney and the Family Visit”
    A Step Into Reading Tale

    One day, Papa arrived in Bertney’s room with a surprise for her.
    “A surprise!” said Bertney. “And it isn’t even my berfday!”
    “I know,” Papa said with a smile. “But Mr. David said you let him play with you last night and you deserve a reward. We’re going to Lewis Anna to see Mama and Jamer Lynn.”
    Bertney was confused. Papa liked to use a lot of big words and it made Bertney hurt to understand, but she had been hoping for Furnch Fries and Papa didn’t talk about them. But she didn’t like the look on Papa’s face so put on a brave a smile.
    “Fun!” she managed. “To the arrowplane!”
    Bertney was darn excited on the plane and bounced up and down on her seat. Even Papa’s angry couldn’t stop her so he had to give her the special white candy that made her head stop.
    When they arrived three Sesame Streets later, Bertney had forgotten all about Furnch fries. She loved Lewis Anna and her sister Jamer Lynn.
    “You are Jamer and Mama is Lynn!” she told Papa. “So Jamer Lynn is like my Papa AND my Mama!”
    “Yes Bertney, yes she is” replied Papa recalling all the times Jamer Lynn had to babysit Bertney.
    At the arrowport Jamer Lynn was waiting and Bertney was upset because she looked like she’d been eating a lot of Furnch Fries. But then Jamer Lynn took her hands from behind her back and gave Bertney a box filled with Furnch Fries!
    Jamer Lynn was truly the bestest big sister in the world.

  15. Ireland Baldwin Purple Hair Driving Chateau Marmont
    Joe Blow
    Commented on this photo:

    Ireland: “Roads? We don’t need roads where, hiccup, where, hiccup, where we’re hiccup, going.”

    Black Guy In Back: “Back to your place for some mind blowing sex?”

    Ireland: “That’s right Mandingo… just let me drop off the Beiber wanna-be first.”

    Beiber Wanna-be: “I’d like to point out that you do need roads to get.. OW!… he punched me in the head!!”

    Black Guy In Back: “Shut up Beibs!”

  16. Joey Lauren Adams Crazy Face Veronica Mars Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes, you have teeth. Enough already.

  17. Mickey Rourke Camo Jacket
    Commented on this photo:

    Ya don’t look so tough now, do ya? Do ya? Oops, I apologize, I shouldn’t make fun of retards. My bad.

  18. Earvin Johnson III Fur Collar Cheetah Slippers
    Commented on this photo:

    Queen LaBeefa

  19. Scout Willis Huge Jaw Only Lovers Left Alive Screening
    Commented on this photo:

    From the nose down, she looks exactly like Bruce Willis. And from the nose up… exactly like Bruce Willis.

  20. Prince Charles Carly Williams Young Achiever Of The Year Award Princes Trust & Samsung Celebrate Success Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn those royals get around. Maybe there is something to that Jack the Ripper theory.

  21. Kermit The Frog Michelle Obama Muppets Most Wanted Screening
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Thank you….great shot.

    • ThisWillHurt

      Not really. They cut Kermit off almost completely. That seems to happen to almost all of the Muppets.

  22. Prince Charles Carly Williams Young Achiever Of The Year Award Princes Trust & Samsung Celebrate Success Awards
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Congratulations, my dear. You’ve demonstrated unparalelled determination and inventiveness. Would you like to join my latest project? The details will be explained in due course; suffice it to say, we’ll need to develop a new biotoxin that can blend seamlessly into Earl Gray tea, and an extensive study of all points of access to Buckingham Palace.”

  23. Maitland Ward Cleavage Style Fashion Week LA Live Event Deck Day 4
    Commented on this photo:

    She only has one dress. Yes, it comes in different colors and materials, but it’s the same dress.

  24. Jamie Lynn Spears Fat Weight Gain Legs Miniskirt Rubber Boots Mother Lynne Spears
    Joe Blow
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d do it…. I like my girls thick, plus I’d like to say I fucked one step away from stark raving crazy.

  25. Sylvester Stallone Winking
    Commented on this photo:

    He finally lost use of his left eye.

  26. Fran Drescher Pale Face
    Commented on this photo:

    She just can’t help playing out her favorite part of Dumb and Dumber… ‘what’s the most annoying sound in the world?’

  27. Kim Kardashian Huge Ass Chain Dress Kourtney Kardashian DASH Miami Store Grand Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    Moo and moo.

  28. Kim Kardashian Huge Ass Chain Dress Kourtney Kardashian DASH Miami Store Grand Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s actually doing us a favor. The light will reflect off her stupid dress and blind you enough to keep your heart from stopping.

  29. Sylvester Stallone Winking
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mr. Stallone! How man millions of dollars did your last movie make at the box office?”

  30. Keith Urban Hugging Old Man
    Commented on this photo:

    Now that is an awkward ‘I’m not gay’ man hug.

  31. Maitland Ward Cleavage Style Fashion Week LA Live Event Deck Day 4
    Commented on this photo:

    Definitely not looking at her forehead this time.

  32. Russell Simmons Twisted Arms ADD52 Musical Showcase And Yoga Session At The Samsung Galaxy Experience SXSW
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    You gotta stay limber if you’re stepping out with a different escort every night.

  33. Kermit The Frog Michelle Obama Muppets Most Wanted Screening
    kermit's caption
    Commented on this photo:

    “she’s a HEEEEEE”

  34. Bruce Jenner Creepy Face Tucking Hair Behind Ear Carrying Iced Coffee
    JoSmoBlo
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m so pretty, oh so pretty!

  35. Prince Charles Carly Williams Young Achiever Of The Year Award Princes Trust & Samsung Celebrate Success Awards
    dennis
    Commented on this photo:

    Prince Charles: “Oh thank God we didn’t Michael Bay this thing…”

  36. Joey Lauren Adams Crazy Face Veronica Mars Premiere
    Bane
    Commented on this photo:

    The last time I saw a mouth like that it had a bit in it.

  37. Kim Kardashian Huge Ass Chain Dress Kourtney Kardashian DASH Miami Store Grand Opening
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Did she spook and charge through the electrical fencing?

  38. David Faustino Riding On Shopping Cart
    Bane
    Commented on this photo:

    Drive it like you stole it.

  39. Keith Urban Hugging Old Man
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve had….the time of my life…
    and I’ve never felt this way before…

  40. David Faustino Riding On Shopping Cart
    jep
    Commented on this photo:

    WTF is that tattoo on Bud’s leg?

  41. Scout Willis Huge Jaw Only Lovers Left Alive Screening
    Bane
    Commented on this photo:

    I leaning more to Jay Leno being their father.

  42. Maitland Ward Cleavage Style Fashion Week LA Live Event Deck Day 4
    ooft
    Commented on this photo:

    subtlety, thy name is Maitland…

  43. Prince Charles Carly Williams Young Achiever Of The Year Award Princes Trust & Samsung Celebrate Success Awards
    jep
    Commented on this photo:

    “I love that video of you dancing on YouTube!”

  44. Russell Simmons Twisted Arms ADD52 Musical Showcase And Yoga Session At The Samsung Galaxy Experience SXSW
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Seriously, you can put your whole hand up Shannon Elizabeth’s vagina. You don’t even have to make a fist. Let me demonstrate . . .”

  45. Damon Wayans Scarf V Neck Shirt LAX
    jep
    Commented on this photo:

    “Back the fuck up!!! Homie don’t play that.”

  46. Robin Antin Wrinkly Face
    jep
    Commented on this photo:

    Who?

  47. Mickey Rourke Camo Jacket
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    Way to stand by your love of beards, Duck Dynasty.

  48. Damon Wayans Scarf V Neck Shirt LAX
    Shemp
    Commented on this photo:

    “Shit!! Did I lock my keys in the car??”

  49. Ireland Baldwin Purple Hair Driving Chateau Marmont
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ireland! Watch out! You’re gonna hit that guy!”
    “I know!”

  50. Kim Kardashian Huge Ass Chain Dress Kourtney Kardashian DASH Miami Store Grand Opening
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    Disco is dead because Kim Kardashian sat on it.

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