The Crap We Missed – Thursday 2.13.14

February 13th, 2014 // 343 Comments

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed where we learn how to say Buy Oats Cheap! in graffiti, as well as the kind of rash your face gets from Sean Penn, and how to casually take a dick selfie from Jeremy Jackson. You’ll see it. I’d have something else snarky to say but it all shot out of my sweat glands during the past hour and a half of shoveling.

Seriously Florida, why do you have to be such a methy bitch?

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Kelly Brook Butt Yoga Pants David McIntosh Short Shorts
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    Kelly sure can pick them d’bags, can’t she?

  2. Michael Douglas Turtleneck Sunglasses Blazer Michael Kors Show Fashion Week
    Commented on this photo:

    “I don’t always attend Fashion week… But when I do, I give the models HPV.”

  3. Rita Ora Nipples No Bra Crocodile Dundee Hat
    Commented on this photo:

    Even on a bad day, London still got the best of the pop tart exchange with LAX.

  4. Prince William Shaking Jackie Chans Hand Illegal Wildlife Trade Conference Reception
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    “Now, I must kill you for insulting the Shao Lin Temple! But first, I must breakdance through a warehouse full of landscaping tools!”

  5. Abbie Cornish Cleavage Tight Dress Jimmy Kimmel Live
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice lady-bumps, but with that bicep-fat she’s starting to look like she’s got an Adele+Turkey Hill addiction.

  6. Charlize Theron Butt Yoga Pants Red Facial Splotches
    Robb7
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, doing Penn is turning her to shit!

  7. Sophie Monk Legs Minidress Sydney Art Gallery
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    “If Catherine The Great can, so can I!”

  8. Alessandra Ambrosio Butt Tight Jeans
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    Now if God could just take half the last girl’s ass & put it on Aly, she’d be perfect.

  9. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Leather Skirt
    Robb7
    Commented on this photo:

    This cunt wears costumes, not clothes.

  10. Phoebe Price Cleavage Legs Romper
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    Jacquie The Stripper, guv?

  11. Ireland Baldwin Bra See Through Blouse Legs Miniskirt Marchesa Fashion Show
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    Stop squinting at me, who are you, Rumer Willis?

  12. Emily B Huge Shelf Ass Tight Pants
    Robb7
    Commented on this photo:

    You can’t walk 6 inches in NYC without falling with all the ice. How the hell is this lard ass bitch doing it high heels??!!!

  13. Johnny Depp Amber Heard Cleavage Legs Slit Dress 3 Days To Kill Premiere
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Johnny’s officially looking old, and she looks more like a daughter than a girlfriend.

  14. Sinead OConnor Red Writing On Cheeks Military Jacket
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Somewhere in this pic is a joke about facial sores and anal sex.

  15. Selena Gomez Nipple No Bra
    Commented on this photo:

    I would too Dan,,,,but the cross and nip confuse me. It’s like yes, no, yes, no.

  16. Mel Gibson Crazy Eyes Full Scruffy Beard
    Commented on this photo:

    “I don’t always drink beer, but when I do, I … uh, who am I kidding? I always drink beer. Stay Christian, my friends.”

  17. Joe Jonas Batman Tshirt Girlfriend Blanda Eggenschwiler The Blonds Fashion Show
    Icehawg
    Commented on this photo:

    So is “beard” a full time job you can, like, just apply for now?

  18. Ireland Baldwin Bra See Through Blouse Legs Miniskirt Marchesa Fashion Show
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s snow on the ground, it’s freezing outside, but I’m wearing my little short dress like it’s Miami in the summer. I must really, really want to show myself off! Oh! Silly me!

  19. Jeremy Jackson Leka Show Fashion Week
    broduhjenner
    Commented on this photo:

    now THIS should be the face of the blue ecig

  20. Candice Swanepoel Butt Cutoff Jean Shorts
    Gin&Tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    Decent ass but overrated.

  21. Johnny Depp Amber Heard Cleavage Legs Slit Dress 3 Days To Kill Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    “Now you can call me Ray, or you can call me J…”

  22. January Jones Almost Dropping Son Xander Off Lap While Swinging
    Gin&Tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    Glad to see the kid looking like he’s having such a great time with his mom

  23. Kelly Brook Butt Yoga Pants David McIntosh Short Shorts
    Gin&Tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d make some (ass)crack about his tramp stamp but for fear that he’d just beat the shit out of me.

  24. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Leather Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    well, at least they found the source of the contaminated meat from last week.

  25. Charlize Theron Butt Yoga Pants Red Facial Splotches
    Gin&Tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    Slow news day, huh?

  26. Sinead OConnor Red Writing On Cheeks Military Jacket
    waynemoores
    Commented on this photo:

    What a fuckin’ nut job. Jusus, her 15 min. were up 20 years ago.

  27. Dakota Fanning Cleavage Rodarte Fashion Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Mmmmmmmmm

  28. Johnny Depp Amber Heard Cleavage Legs Slit Dress 3 Days To Kill Premiere
    Gin&Tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    Little by little she’s slowing starting to look like his ex baby momma.

  29. Jude Law Crazy Eyes Ruth Wilson Box Club
    Commented on this photo:

    “Pedo Steel”.

  30. Prince William Shaking Jackie Chans Hand Illegal Wildlife Trade Conference Reception
    Gin&tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait for it: the ninja-chop to the royal adam’s apple is mere seconds away…

  31. Jude Law Crazy Eyes Ruth Wilson Box Club
    Gin&Tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    I was about to make a pedophile joke but the first two posters beat me to it. That’s one creepy looking mofo

  32. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Leather Skirt
    Gin&Tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugly bitch is getting fat again

  33. Prince William Shaking Jackie Chans Hand Illegal Wildlife Trade Conference Reception
    waynemoores
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow…morphing into Charles already. Remember it seems just like yesterday I was thinking, lucky for him he inherited mom’s good looks and the family loot. Now the Queen is nearly broke and he looks like his old man. Wow…best laid plans and all that. Next Kate will be dumping him to the curb for some Arab billionaire. I put the over/under on that as -2 years!

    • cmonreally

      No no no no no. Kate has waited too damn long for her ring, and she isn’t going to let the crown slip through her vice-like fingers. She’ll be with Wills forever.

  34. Mel Gibson Crazy Eyes Full Scruffy Beard
    Odbarc
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like the father of Borat.
    Holocaust? Very nice.

  35. Taylor Swift Bra See Through Shirt
    Gin&Tonic
    Commented on this photo:

    Not even the transparent shirt and loincloth-inspired skirt can’t save how incredibly boring she is.

  36. Dakota Fanning Cleavage Rodarte Fashion Show
    Odbarc
    Commented on this photo:

    When am I going to see her naked, dammit! She’s been 18 for a while now, hasn’t she? Where’s this movie she fucks somebody at?

  37. Rita Ora Nipples No Bra Crocodile Dundee Hat
    Commented on this photo:

    jebena siptarka

  38. Dakota Fanning Cleavage Rodarte Fashion Show
    mike
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yes, first class from Paris to Los Angeles. That’s P-O-L-A-N-S-K-I.”

  39. Joe Jonas Batman Tshirt Girlfriend Blanda Eggenschwiler The Blonds Fashion Show
    waynemoores
    Commented on this photo:

    My God, have no idea who the hot babe is but Jesus, it looks for all the world like an older sister taking her mentally challenged younger brother out for some fresh air. Who dresses him? Shea La Douche?

  40. Selena Gomez Nipple No Bra
    waynemoores
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m with you on that one Don

  41. Ireland Baldwin Bra See Through Blouse Legs Miniskirt Marchesa Fashion Show
    AC
    Commented on this photo:

    I really think that boning her would be terrifying. The genetics are like, 98% Basinger, but you KNOW she’d go full Baldwin at just the wrong moment.

  42. Alessandra Ambrosio Butt Tight Jeans
    waynemoores
    Commented on this photo:

    Seems kinda ordinary without the million dollar bra. But what the hell!

  43. Joe Jonas Batman Tshirt Girlfriend Blanda Eggenschwiler The Blonds Fashion Show
    cmonreally
    Commented on this photo:

    Bland Egg-swallower?

  44. Phoebe Price Cleavage Legs Romper
    waynemoores
    Commented on this photo:

    Monthly exit to where? The carny freak show. Gwad.

  45. Ireland Baldwin Bra See Through Blouse Legs Miniskirt Marchesa Fashion Show
    waynemoores
    Commented on this photo:

    AC: apparently Kim was/is a bigger nut job than Alec and always has been. It’s a wonder the kid isn’t an axe murderer.

  46. Rita Ora Nipples No Bra Crocodile Dundee Hat
    waynemoores
    Commented on this photo:

    I see it’s a little chilly over in the old country as well as here in the colonies. Blimey!

  47. Johnny Depp Amber Heard Cleavage Legs Slit Dress 3 Days To Kill Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    “Well, she made me give up my pirate gear, but I’m a better man for it. Or, at least, I’m hitting that ass like a methed up boxer.”

  48. Prince William Shaking Jackie Chans Hand Illegal Wildlife Trade Conference Reception
    Commented on this photo:

    “I know what it’s like to be in your shoes….jinx!…ha ha…wait, what?”

  49. Jude Law Crazy Eyes Ruth Wilson Box Club
    Commented on this photo:

    “The night is ours! Ha Ha! And the meth. The meth is ours!”

  50. Mel Gibson Crazy Eyes Full Scruffy Beard
    journalschism
    Commented on this photo:

    Mel will sell you Cheetos now.

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