The Crap We Missed – Thursday 10.4.12

October 4th, 2012 // 541 Comments

Thanks for letting Thursday’s The Crap We Missed crawl back into your life. Now it’s only a matter of time before it punches laughter into your face for peeping its photos. Subtlety, it’s what we do. Anyway, today we’ve got little Mason Disick, who’s already learned to do as he’s told, especially by Grandma Jenner, as well as Nicole Kidman‘s human oral sex replicator chip malfunctioning at an untimely moment, and finally, this perfect summation of Romney Supporters in the form of an exceedingly proud, unemployed white man in his tighty whities. USA! USA!

Liam Hemsworth‘s sister-in-law (Why is is so satisfying to describe her that way?) is today’s Final Five,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Natalie Portman Cleavage Legs Black Minidress
    The Pope
    Commented on this photo:

    So I take it John Hamm’s penis is in Austin too?

  2. Natalie Portman Cleavage Legs Black Minidress
    Pine Table Fever
    Commented on this photo:

    That is exactly the same face I made when I saw this photo.

  3. Chris Noth Kate Upton Everything Or Nothing The Untold Story Of 007
    Mumra
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah the unfairness of life. Sixty year old Chris Noth with a drink in one hand, a babe in the other and not a care in the world. Twenty five year old Kate Upton terrified to eat or drink anything because she’s afraid she’ll wake up in the morning weighing 260 pounds. #JessicaSimpsonSyndrome

  4. AnnaLynne McCord Butt Bending Over Tight Skirt 90210 Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait..hold still. Lemme undo my pants and get a running start at that.

  5. Natalie Portman Cleavage Legs Black Minidress
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    “You’re not cutting those puppies out Terry!” thought Natalie that morning as she stuffed her bra, knowing Terrence Malick’s habit of editing actors out of his movies.

  6. Scott Disick Rob Kardashian
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    “She’s following us Scott!!!!”
    “Don’t worry Robbie, just keep walking. There’s many things your mom will do in front of a camera, but not murder. Once we’re at the airport, homefree baby!”

  7. Rose McGowan Legs Short Shorts Boots
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    I f-ed Robert Rodriguez and all I got was this lousy career…

  8. Neve Campbell Book Of Mormon
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Scream 5? Anyone? please? Party Of 6? I need the money!!!!

  9. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    I! Will Suck! YOUR YOUTH!!! Bleh! Bleh!

  10. Leighton Meester Butt Tight Skirt
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    So….not Pippa Middleton? Oh this one has an ass…sort of…

  11. Cheryl Cole Cleavage
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Cheryl doing her best Janet Jackson impression

  12. Kate Bosworth Skinny Legs Short Shorts
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Snap those two together you’ve got a regular person.

  13. Eva Longoria Butt Tight Jeans
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Still trying out for the Kim Kardashian lookalike gig, huh? This time with ass-pads!

  14. Elsa Pataky Cleavage Legs Minidress Paris Fashion Week
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Ggggaaahh!!! She’s hypnotizing me!!!! Must….resist….urge…to take….picture………aaaaahhhh

  15. Cheryl Cole Cleavage
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like Hammer time with breasts.

  16. Lady Gaga Standing On Back Up Dancers Groin
    Commented on this photo:

    Didn’t Madonna sport this look over 30 years ago? So original.

  17. Elsa Pataky Cleavage Legs Minidress Paris Fashion Week
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Well she obviously can’t move her eyes or mouth. Or entire face for that matter.

  18. Elsa Pataky Cleavage Legs Minidress Paris Fashion Week
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Most of the women that day were bored by the clothes. On the other hand Elsa was intently observing the models, trying to spot a limb she liked for her next enhancement.

  19. Elsa Pataky Cleavage Legs Minidress Paris Fashion Week
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    “Don’t look at my face, look at my boobs! I didn’t buy them so they’d get ignored!” is what her frighteningly frozen face is trying to say

  20. Elsa Pataky Cleavage Legs Minidress Paris Fashion Week
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    “Help, my face is melting under these bright lights!” is what her frighteningly frozen face is trying to say.

  21. Neve Campbell Book Of Mormon
    Brit
    Commented on this photo:

    Dumpy, Plain and not aging well. Scream 1, 2 and 3.

  22. Natalie Portman Cleavage Legs Black Minidress
    slinky
    Commented on this photo:

    I would fuck her until she couldnt stand

  23. Natalie Portman Cleavage Legs Black Minidress
    Anastasia Beaverhausen
    Commented on this photo:

    Girl is fine!

  24. Neve Campbell Book Of Mormon
    Brit
    Commented on this photo:

    You know it’s a rough day for a B-list movie star when the old bald guy would rather check out a frumpy fat chick . And it’s a rough day for the old bald guy when the frumpy fat chick would rather check out the B-list movie star’s ass.

  25. Natalie Portman Cleavage Legs Black Minidress
    weaselmouse
    Commented on this photo:

    Those boobs are not for real.

  26. Sammi Giancola
    Anastasia Beaverhausen
    Commented on this photo:

    Eewww!

  27. The Naked Cowboy Romney Tighty Whities
    Anastasia Beaverhausen
    Commented on this photo:

    He should’ve been shot.

  28. Elsa Pataky Cleavage Legs Minidress Paris Fashion Week
    mismy
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does that lady is the black lace appear to have a penis lodged in her throat??

    • napoupi

      It’s because there is one. He name is Mathilde Coureau. She was a mediocre French actress, not a complete nobody, but nothing huge either. Then she married an aristocrat, the Prince of Savoie, and ever she’s been like : looking like Victoria Beckham and pretending she’s royalty or something. Except the dick that got her where she is now remains stuck in her throat and won’t come off…

      • napoupi

        Sorry for skipping half of the words in my post :

        “It’s because there is one. Her name is Mathilde Coureau. She was a mediocre French actress, not a complete nobody, but nothing huge either. Then she married an aristocrat, the Prince of Savoie, and ever since, she’s been like this : looking like Victoria Beckham and pretending she’s royalty or something. Except the dick that got her where she is now remains stuck in her throat and won’t come off…”

  29. AnnaLynne McCord Butt Bending Over Tight Skirt 90210 Set
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s almost makes me want to go lesbo. I said almost, don’t make me fight you.

  30. Elsa Pataky Cleavage Legs Minidress Paris Fashion Week
    mismy
    Commented on this photo:

    She just had a kid, tits could be real. Stop complaining pussies

  31. Neve Campbell Book Of Mormon
    Oldnslo
    Commented on this photo:

    Go see Wild Things. Great movie, and she looks great in it.

  32. Sean Bean Drunk
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Ffffffffffffffekk-off!

  33. AnnaLynne McCord Butt Bending Over Tight Skirt 90210 Set
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    She must be wearing a very meager thing. Not a panty line in sight.

    In any case, if I plowed into a parked car, I’d definitely go to traffic court and bring this picture as evidence.

    • seriouslynow

      Indeed, if I saw that Gallardo Spyder I’d probably drive right into her butt pads like my name was Amanda Bynes.

  34. Lady Gaga Standing On Back Up Dancers Groin
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I want to see more of that pink Jabba the Hut.

  35. Mickey Rourke Sweater Vest Bandaged Arm
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Heroine chic is even less attractive than you thought…

  36. Nicole Kidman Licking Microphone The Paperboy Q & A
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, flexible porcelain…thank you NASA!

  37. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Mason Disick
    Queef Sister
    Commented on this photo:

    Neither of these kids are potty trained and Kim is OK with that.

  38. Scott Disick Rob Kardashian
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    My comment about there not being a God earlier? Look at the pic above and tell me I’m not right.

  39. Natalie Portman Cleavage Legs Black Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s her reaction to seeing John Hamm’s penis.

  40. Ireland Baldwin Midriff
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Dang she’s cute.

  41. Mickey Rourke Sweater Vest Bandaged Arm
    Commented on this photo:

    well Rourke is his usual mess, wonder where he picked up the the dead leprechaun?

  42. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘Elizabeth Hurley at The Bay for the Estee Lauder Companies’ Breast Cancer Awareness Campaign in Toronto.’

    What the fucking fuck fuckety fuck…she was in town and I missed it?!

    *swallows Drano*

    • Ken

      Well let’s see: Toronto has a population of what? two an a half million? If we assume that there were a thousand people on hand to witness a makeup company’s cancer awareness campaign at an overpriced department store…. you weren’t part of the .04% of the city’s attendees. Now if all of the people who weren’t there would also swallow Drano, thereby eliminating 99.96% of the city’s population, Toronto would be a nice place.

      • cc

        It would make it a hell of it easier on my car. I’ve been plowed into three times in three years. All while just sitting waiting for a light to change.

  43. Neve Campbell Book Of Mormon
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    The Book of Mormon…look for it in ‘Fiction’.

  44. Scott Disick Rob Kardashian
    Commented on this photo:

    now there’s a pair to draw to. said no one.

  45. Kate Bosworth Skinny Legs Short Shorts
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    That purse she made at day camp is so cute!

  46. Elsa Pataky Cleavage Legs Minidress Paris Fashion Week
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    That lady shouldn’t steal a lock of her hair…that’s just rude.

  47. Nicole Kidman Licking Microphone The Paperboy Q & A
    Later
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m sorry i just had botox, can´t fell my lips…

  48. Sammi Giancola
    lala
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s something going on with her right eye that isn’t happening with her left, and it’s really throwing me off. Do people typically get eye lifts only on one side? Or is her hair just pulled back too tight? Bad makeup? I’m so confused.

  49. Cheryl Cole Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    those tits look like they hurt.

  50. Lady Gaga Standing On Back Up Dancers Groin
    Gobstopper
    Commented on this photo:

    *Oompa Loompa doo-ba-dee doo…*

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