Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed which is exciting today, because we get to introduce our new intern! (Pending his acceptance of our compensation package including: Unlimited access to Jon Hamm penis photos, daily emotional and/or sexual abuse by Fish, and Kardashian swag) Aside from the man whose name could double for HBO’s programming robot, we’ve also got Reese Witherspoon joining the growing list of Hollywood moms doing it better than Jessica Simpson, and Jim Sturgess who only brought condoms and Zima to this event to warn kids of the dangers of talking to strangers online.
What does the fact that this made me squeal with joy say about me?
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Sherlock Holmes called, he wants his shoes back.
Aren’t they from the Sorcerer’s Apprentice movie with Nick Cage?
What a lame d-bag look! Gingers are evil.
“…I…..forgot….my….hair………………..gel”
That… is no longer attractive. At all.
When was it ever attractive?
Back when it was 30 psi.
He’s a time travelling collage: 70s mustache, 80s tie, 90s suit and the unifying theme through the years: empty stoned out red eyes.
“MOM! I don’t want to go the fancy dress party after this! I just want my boobs to stay in my dress!”
Hey Kobe? I’d like to talk to you about an investment opportunity. For an initial fee of…
LOOK OUT IT’S COLLAPSING!!
Like the Joker said: All it takes is a little push!
It seems Terry Richardson only photographs girls who take their clothes off and guys who are bigger bags of smegma than he is. I guess that’s why he doesn’t take many pictures of men.
anyone who thinks all ‘women’ should look like this should go visit Thailand.
“…wait til they get a load of ME…”
HAHAHA!!! She does kinda look like the Joker!!
Her depends are crooked/full. Eww…
I really do know Kung Fu. Just look at my amazing ability to fix my hair with a single kick.
“I Wish I Knew How to Quit You”
this proves the homeless people wishing timberlake happy wedding day on video were made to do it at gunpoint.
If ever there was a time for a football to the nuts, this was it.
If she painted her ass orange and walked backwards, it would look like Pumpkin Head walking on his hands.
If it’s cold enough for a hat and leg warmers it’s cold enough for socks.
looks like she lost a few teeth when she fell off those hooker heels.
The guy on the poster has the right idea.
WTF? I got nothing. This is sad.
just pulled fire alarm.
sneaks away.
Little did Jim know that the gonorrhea would instantly begin affecting his vision and burning his eyes.
“Oh, it’s just a little bit that got in there, no need to worry” Tom said as he pulled up his pants in the limo. Well that little BIT, was all it took!
What a tragic rack!
Oy!!!
Let me help you out…the reason you can’t see her nipples is because you’re looking where nipples SHOULD be…look higher, higher, a little higher…THERE they are.
This was the perfect outfit to showcase her duckface and her implant scars.
As he opened his mouth, the collective I.Q.s in the arena went on the decline. Can’t stand this douche.
“Somebody get a mechanic! She’s losing parts!”
As long as her penis doesn’t fall out. WHEW! Now THAT would suck.
Wow…she used to be such a PoA. Sadness!
Bumpin’ uglies.
“…the female signalled sexually to the male from behind with a pair of fleshy, hemispherical buttocks…” – from The Naked Ape by Desmond Morris (1967), wherein he also makes reference to “the ancient genital display of hemispherical buttocks…”
Dancin’ in the street!
I guess she let her kid do her make up
I love the glass of straight up booze Charles is clutching!
I am not exaggerating when I say I would love to hang out with these people.
“Dammit Matt, I wasn’t ready to disappear that hooker. She still had a pulse!”
The core of his name is taken from the least popular Jackson. Really? Someone put him out of his misery.
she tossed out all the mirrors at home and now just shmears on whatever makeup is lying around.
epitome of a “butt-her-face”
great rack, though
You mean great implants, right?
Yes, this girl would definitely require 2/3rds of a bottle of Cabo Wabo before an attempt was made…
She’s getting too old to be in charge of her own makeup.
Made in China
Made in Thailand*
Humpty Pumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Pumpty had a great fall.
All the king’s whores and all the king’s men
Wouldn’t touch that shit with a ten foot pole.
Ben’s toupee is really looking ragged.
2 MOO(n)s, 1 bucket.
Russel Brand continues to rock the “homeless female” look.
No words. Just lots and lots of laughter. Her ass is just wrong.
If you have unfortunate breasts, you should be working with them — not against them.
I wouldn’t hire someone with a face like that to be a cashier let alone a model.
She should try bangs. Her giant forehead and unfortunate plastic surgery leave her with a “my face is sliding off” kind of look.
What the hell is up with that street? We have this tool bag in flip gl
Oops