And this is why Maxim is just about out of business.
Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed brought to you by Doublemint’s new flavor, Wintwhoregreen. We’ve also got Jennifer Love Hewitt pointing out an ass that could hold just one, maybe two engagement rings at the most, HA! As well as the look on Alessandra Ambrosio‘s husband’s face that says “My New Year’s Eve was better than yours and, oh yeah, I almost forgot, your dick is small.”
Complain about dudes in the Final Five and this is what you get — I’M IN CONTROL HERE!
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Voice range reaches Mickey Mouse level with increased trouser tension…
Model sandwich!!
Don’t hate me because I’m booteeful!
I’ve seen bigger tits on Steven Tyler
I’ve seen a more feminine face on Steven Tyler.
Wow, he’s still alive?!?
My thoughts exactly.
I was also wondering the same thing.
Solid actor btw
Way to relate to your fans…
Oops, The Dark Crystal was wrong, there’s still one more Gelfling left.
the winner
Octomom?
She looks like Sweet Dee’s sister.
seems fitting that the typeface that spells out “lindsay lohan” is the typeface used for coke and it looks like she did a few lines off her name.
Nice observation. That had to be intentional on Maxim’s part.
As a graphic designer myself, I can say with almost certainty that this was in fact, intentional.
“What do I think of when I think of Lindsay Lohan… pure columbian coke… coke… and more coke…” Takes sip of tasty beverage… “mmm this coke is delicio-…” *idea!!!!
That’s pretty much how it goes.
u know his eyeballs are just screaming to get out.
Strutting like a queen
I’d like him better if he was one.
Who is she blowing to keep getting the cover of Maxim LONG after her expiration date? I mean the images in this magazine (and Playboy for that matter) are so drastically different from the real thing that the images might as well be of a fictional character.
Leave the poor old hobo alone! He’s had a rough life.
That is an extremely unfortunate-looking woman.
he looks like a diseased wiener.
He looks like he’s getting ready to implode!
everyone calls themselves sweet dee nowadays…
this website is slow as balls
He looks like a dirty jesus.
This is one of the three photograph that makes up the entirety of the Mickey Rourke episode of CRIBS.
Is it just me, or does he look like Clayface just got Tom Sizemore and Tom Hanks confused?
That’s right, hold you mouth open just like that and you too can become an expert cocksuckin’ BITCH!!
I still think she looks mighty fine… ;)
Does anyone else find it ironic that the caption next to her head is “Reboot Your Life” ??
You mean that wasn’t intended to be there?
(BTW, is Maxim really going tits up?)
‘If you don’t get your mediocre ass out of my way I will cut you!’
I’m an angry man, and I hate damn near everything – but for some reason I can’t explain, this picture makes me giggle.
Wanna get some beers and kick a few puppies?
And not a single pud was pulled that day.
Here is truth.
Let’s see… from left to right:
Control freak, douchebag, pill popper, coke fiend.
How close am I?
+1
Wish she was ‘In the Darkness’ so we wouldn’t have to look at her. Yeesh!!
Milk, milk, lemonade, this is where the fudge is made.
Show me on this picture where he made you fat.
Why yes, that is a penis in my pants….
I guess when they split everything 50/50 he got a pair of her jeans.
“Gosselin, get back to work! These coupons aren’t going to blog themselves!”
All this picture is missing is that Sarah McLaclan song from those SPCA ads. *sniff*
Don’t fret. We’re all surprised, too.
What on that phone could possibly be making her show her sex face?
…a NAMBLA production.
My first though was “The Face of NAMBLA.”
Hipster doofus.
She has a figure like a roll of pennies.
When you’re ordered by the court not to call Heidi Fleiss, I guess the best you can do sometimes is try to channel her instead.
His current girlfriend looks suspiciously like a young Heidi Fleiss.
Which girlfriend??? or hooker///junkie are you talking about..
I’m sorry, folks, but becoming a whore is the only way Heidi Fleiss could get fucked, ‘cuz ya know, she’s fucking gruesome!
He looks like he spent the holidays at the set or something.
He loves him some iron lady, yes he does.
I figured out what to do with my tossed salad and scrambled eggs… put ‘em in a tube and mail it to Kelsey Grammar.
It’s like concentration camp porn.
Great. Now I want to bang Vera de Milo.
+10
Even her butt crack looks perturbed.
Shit, she looks better than Lindsay Lohan.
+1
Shit, we all look better than Lindsay Lohan…except for tits. She’s still got great tits.
Damn, I thought it was “Olive Oyl Palermo”.
Fish, Photo Boy – I think the zoom function’s broken…
“Objects in Picture Are As Small As They Appear.”