And this is why Maxim is just about out of business.
Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed brought to you by Doublemint’s new flavor, Wintwhoregreen. We’ve also got Jennifer Love Hewitt pointing out an ass that could hold just one, maybe two engagement rings at the most, HA! As well as the look on Alessandra Ambrosio‘s husband’s face that says “My New Year’s Eve was better than yours and, oh yeah, I almost forgot, your dick is small.”
Complain about dudes in the Final Five and this is what you get — I’M IN CONTROL HERE!
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Be Lindsay’s sex hero: bring antibiotics and Valtrex. And rubbers. Lots of rubbers.
don’t forget to saran wrap your balls.
Triple wrap!!
So many black penises . . .
So little time.
Wrong like the tits on a tranny
This is why I love Photoshop. They’ve erased the years of alcohol, cigarette and meth abuse from her face. Bravah, she almost looks fuckable again.
Bravo??
“I remember when mine was that big.”
Jen just figured out her demographic. Next think you know she’s going to be hanging around the Kardashians and trying to pick up their spares.
Yeah he’s straight. No doubt.
It’s the Bearded Lady!
Honey, we should hang out with your friends more.
Is this one of those Goldilocks planets people are talking about?
“God, I feel so mediocre.”
A career selling coupons IS mediocre.
DERP
Fucking Janice Dickenson is EVERYWHERE.
Ohh, but I feel sorry for this one..
I’ll give them this: Maxim is clearly hiring better Photoshoppers than Playboy.
No shit. What a disappointment.
“Oh my God, it is! It IS double fudge chocolate brownie ice cream!!! Out of our way bitches!”
ha haha!
“How big is Penny Marshall now? Well, game on!”
Dude, that hat is waaaayyyy too small for your oversized noodle.
“I’m tired of trying with guys. I wanna put my tongue riiiight there.”
Kids, the babysitter is here! Say hi to Mr. Creepy.
Her vagina ate the fuck out of that shirt.
Good thing her name was up. I didn’t recognize her without a tit hanging out.
So she finally puts on a bra, and it’s to go to the gay side of town in West Hollywood? I don’t understand show business.
Thanks, TF, I thought I was the only one who noticed.
He’s crying, but the tears are coming out on the back of his head.
The name says Lindsay Lohan. The font says coke.
They literally wrote her name with Coke. Awesome.
Excellent! :-D
Good eye, Minstrel :)
Get out of my city, whores!
I flat out hate Mark Cuban now!
Chin up Russell, you’ll be over that American bird in no time.
no way in hell is this attractive
The “Fangoria” cover pretty much sums up this entire photo.
Jesus…
Not even he can fix this.
“Five thousand dollars? What was I thinking? I used to command $30,000 for a fuck. When did you start losing it all, Victoria?”
This could very well be the most boobless Final Five in recent memory. And that’s including David Beckham.
the font says ‘free’ from dafont.com….
cheap bastards…
“I’m a free bitch, baby.”
He looks like a Dick Tracy villain, but without the need for makeup.
+1 I bow to your superior recognition skills
Even man’s dream right there.
That coat is mediocre.
I can’t tell if this is the result of too much plastic surgery or not enough…
Oh shit, he’s seizing again.
Why must their mouths always be open like the blow-up dolls they really are?
Reflex action, those shorts are baggy.
Bahahaha
3 miles away, someone just dropped a waffle in an IHOP.
Funny Gravy
The cover shot is from a Maxims USA’s 2010 issue. This is Australia and sometimes they run what they want or pick from the archives of all the other foreign Maxims and make something out of it later.
Jesus, photo boy! You could’ve at least given us some tits! It’s like your punishing everybody!
You’re* oh my god, I’m so ashamed.
Ten Hail Marys, three Our… Fathers…?
However that all works…
The best part was half-time when Khloe shot basketballs out of her pussy (how does she get that many in there?!?) and Kim’s ass was used as the Jumbotron. Good times!
cracked me up!!
Oh, a heel band-aid. How sexy.
“Hi, Amy? You’ll never guess what I’m doing! I’m Difficult Browning a magazine cover with my finger! Serious! Hah-heee! So, anyway, d’you find some husband material for me, or what…?”
A pompous, modern-day Fop who shops in the bins.
I’m all for the P.S.A.’s against doing drugs, but these “Faces Of Meth” posters are getting a little too graphic.
Totally engrossed in Casey Anthony’s just-released video diary.