The Crap We Missed – Thursday 1.16.14

January 16th, 2014 // 419 Comments

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed where I’d like to deviate from the usual program of yoga-panted ass to share with you guys a lesson I learned today. You see, when you live on the Internet like I do, it’s not always kittens in baskets and Saved By The Bell gifs, sometimes it’s plain hard truths. Truths like instead of wasting four years of life on exactly the college major I chose – #5, I should have learned how to manage the restaurant I’ll inevitably end up working in. Point taken, Internet, point taken. *digs flare out of cigar box, wipes away tears* So, sorry to my buddies at Take One, but it looks like my interning efforts were for naught as it’s only a matter of time now before I’m counting how many extra sides of ranch requests it will take for me to take my own life. Please enjoy this gallery while I still have the privilege of making them for a living. There’s Russell Brand guest speaking at the ‘Give It Up’ conference, which is sort of like inviting Chris Brown to speak at a womens’ shelter, Snooki struggling with a revolving door because cocaine will make you skinny, but it won’t make you strong, and Aunt Becky who is 49. That’s almost 50, folks.

Wow, you know what Internet? This food service thing might not be so bad after all. You always know how to cheer me up,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Drew Barrymore Book Signing Barnes & Noble
    MarketingMike
    Commented on this photo:

    Didn’t she used to have actual lips?

  2. Kiefer Sutherland Fan Pretending To Punch Face
    MarketingMike
    Commented on this photo:

    Either this is a joke, or Kiefer’s getting ready to take a nap.
    Usually he just drinks himself to nap, today he’s getting help.

  3. Ali Larter Legs Minidress Pumping Gas
    Commented on this photo:

    If we did that while filling the tank, people would stare and shake their heads.

  4. Lori Loughlin Butt Warm Up Pants
    MarketingMike
    Commented on this photo:

    For 49, she is very nice. I’ll take your place in line, no problem…

  5. Lori Loughlin Butt Warm Up Pants
    MarketingMike
    Commented on this photo:

    For 49, she is very nice. I’ll take your place in line, no problem…

  6. Zosia Mamet Lena Dunham Allison Williams Richard E Grant Girls Season Three Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Zosia is wondering if there will be any Richard left for her – after Lena is done with him.

  7. Ireland Baldwin Butt Bikini Instagram
    MarketingMike
    Commented on this photo:

    Three days ago you were all slamming this little minx.
    Try and remember her mom is fucking Kim Basinger,
    Last time I checked that ass is a 10.

  8. Will Smith Floral Print Pants Long Scarf Leather Jacket at Valentino FW Mens Collection Presentation Paris
    Commented on this photo:

    I see Will shed himself of about 90 pounds of useless fat…by leaving Jayden at home.

  9. Bar Refaeli Cleavage Bra Instagram
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    I get so weak in the knees I can hardly speak.
    I lose all control and something takes over me.
    In a daze, your love’s so amazing, it’s not a phase.
    I want you to stay with me, by my side.
    I swallow my pride, your love is so sweet.
    It knocks me right off of my feet.
    I can’t explain why your loving makes me weak.

    That song was about cake.

  10. Kylie Jenner Butt Tight High Waisted Pants
    MarketingMike
    Commented on this photo:

    Just out of frame in the Van, the rapper she’s going to blow
    for her new sex tape.

  11. Kiefer Sutherland Fan Pretending To Punch Face
    Commented on this photo:

    Here’s a Hamm joke here, I know.

  12. Zosia Mamet Lena Dunham Allison Williams Richard E Grant Girls Season Three Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    gawd…she looks like a seal barking for a fish

  13. Kevin Jonas Kissing Wife Danielle Jonas Touching Pregnant Belly
    Commented on this photo:

    Let’s dissect this picture a little:

    1. Hands placed like he has no idea where to touch a woman
    2. worlds most awkward kiss
    3. A Jonas brother

    My gaydar is going off like Rip Taylor in a confetti factory.

  14. Drew Barrymore Book Signing Barnes & Noble
    Commented on this photo:

    …and this is my vulva under 300x magnification

  15. Coco Huge Butt Upside Down On Stripper Pole Instagram
    Dirty Sanchez
    Commented on this photo:

    I will volunteer to clean that pole .

  16. Ali Larter Legs Minidress Pumping Gas
    Dirty Sanchez
    Commented on this photo:

    Free whiffs for everyone ..

  17. Arnold Schwarzenegger Thick Woman Opening His Car Door
    Commented on this photo:

    I think I speak for everyone when I say, “What. The. FUCK?!”

  18. Snooki Struggling To Push Revolving Door
    Really ?
    Commented on this photo:

    More like an ooooompa loooooompa every shot….

  19. Snooki Struggling To Push Revolving Door
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought hamster wheels were vertical.

  20. Ireland Baldwin Butt Bikini Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Does she know that there’s a guy following her around and photographing her ass? Like all day, every day?

  21. Ita Buttrose
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she related to Anita Asstulip?

  22. Will Smith Floral Print Pants Long Scarf Leather Jacket at Valentino FW Mens Collection Presentation Paris
    dixonblonde
    Commented on this photo:

    For one shining moment, Natasha Lyonne finds someone who looks more fucked up than she does.

  23. Cheryl Coko Clemons Leanne Lelee Lyons Tamara Taj George SWV Reunited Series Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Every one of those girls spelled “Fat” wrong.

  24. Ali Larter Legs Minidress Pumping Gas
    dixonblonde
    Commented on this photo:

    “Where’s my talent??? I got your talent right here! No seriously, you’re looking at the totality of my talent.”

  25. Brooklyn Decker Nipples No Bra CBS Winter TCA Tour
    MIRV
    Commented on this photo:

    She makes Taylor Swift’s smiles (rare as they are, she usually sorta smirks) seem genuine in comparison. Still, if I were on CBS I wouldn’t be happy either.

  26. Chris Pine Hugging Kevin Costner Jack Ryan Shadow Recruit
    malaka
    Commented on this photo:

    can james van der beek close the deal?
    find out tonight at 11:00

  27. Amy Adams Butt Tight Jeans
    malaka
    Commented on this photo:

    i heard she used to work at hooters.

  28. Ali Larter Legs Minidress Pumping Gas
    malaka
    Commented on this photo:

    don’t ever get pregnant…

  29. Chris Pine Hugging Kevin Costner Jack Ryan Shadow Recruit
    Commented on this photo:

    Come on Kev, think about it…Waterworld 2…with Jack’s brother Gill…the public will eat that shit up!

  30. Zosia Mamet Lena Dunham Allison Williams Richard E Grant Girls Season Three Premiere
    malaka
    Commented on this photo:

    quick richard!! use the patronus charm to repel the darkness!!
    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

  31. Coco Huge Butt Upside Down On Stripper Pole Instagram
    TooCoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Proving that products always look better in advertising, this is an actual photo of the Chocolate Fountain at Golden Corral.

  32. Ali Larter Legs Minidress Pumping Gas
    TooCoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Really? Arco Gas?

  33. Zosia Mamet Lena Dunham Allison Williams Richard E Grant Girls Season Three Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey Richard, I just went down on someone, guess which sex?

  34. Joe Jonas Feeding Meter Put Your Sad Down Shirt
    Thank you for your kind help.
    Commented on this photo:

    Put a circle around your sad over down? Put around you sad down under? Am I stupid (calm down commenters) ? I just don’t get the shirt…down under put your circle around sad… what!?!

  35. Kevin Jonas Kissing Wife Danielle Jonas Touching Pregnant Belly
    Commented on this photo:

    It looks like she is the mutant Rogue and her touch is sucking the life out of him.

  36. Drew Barrymore Book Signing Barnes & Noble
    Commented on this photo:

    Ha ha ha ha…watch me do Brooke Shields

  37. Kiefer Sutherland Fan Pretending To Punch Face
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d pay good money to see that guy fist Taylor Swift.

  38. Joe Jonas Feeding Meter Put Your Sad Down Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    The back of his shirt probably reads ‘and your ass up’

  39. Denise Richards Flat Ass Tight Jeans LAX
    malaka
    Commented on this photo:

    “denise richards COLON it’s complicated”

  40. Snooki Struggling To Push Revolving Door
    Commented on this photo:

    Come on, lets give the girl some credit here. Before having a kid she probably would’ve tried to blow the door open.

  41. Snooki Struggling To Push Revolving Door
    Heywood Jablomie
    Commented on this photo:

    You can put lipstick on a pig.

  42. Arnold Schwarzenegger Thick Woman Opening His Car Door
    Commented on this photo:

    John Conner has nothing to fear. It seems that terminators are easily distracted by latina maids.

  43. Joe Jonas Feeding Meter Put Your Sad Down Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    “The Jonas brothers broke up so that How could pursue his street pole dancing career.

  44. Snooki Struggling To Push Revolving Door
    Commented on this photo:

    She would have better luck if she was smarter than the door.

  45. Amy Adams Butt Tight Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    Maria Menonous is not impressed.

  46. Zosia Mamet Lena Dunham Allison Williams Richard E Grant Girls Season Three Premiere
    icu
    Commented on this photo:

    I can still smell the hot dog on you, please, regurgitate some of it for me! Pleeeeeease! Mama want wiener!

  47. Coco Huge Butt Upside Down On Stripper Pole Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Not even the Jaws of Life can save that pole now.

  48. Russell Brand Huge White Dog Give It Up Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he there to give up comedy perhaps?

  49. Ali Larter Legs Minidress Pumping Gas
    Commented on this photo:

    Been sniffing the fumes again I see.

  50. Zosia Mamet Lena Dunham Allison Williams Richard E Grant Girls Season Three Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    There is a whole lotta ‘ewwww’ going on here.

Leave A Comment