“Stay calm, Ryan. There’s a Purell bath and a foot long Coney just waiting in your trailer.”
Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Kim Kardashian double-fisting it in a pic that somehow doesn’t take place in an NFL locker room, Simon Cowell suddenly realizing that all that fabulous wealth and sex with models won’t ever change his hairy man-boobs and Claire Forlani getting felt up by her husband on vacation because he paid for the swim-up suite.
Today’s Final Five is a pic short, but I made up for by tossing a shot of my unsung hero of the People’s Choice Awards in at the end,
- Photo Boy
Click Here To Start The Gallery
Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Who the fuck is she?
One of Mtv’s “Teen Moms”.
Who cares!
GYAH!!!
Um yerrrrhhh, what the F are you wearing homeboy?
We have only the blogger’s word that this is Kelly Brook.
Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t.
Hair color looks wrong IMO.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2085730/Kelly-Brook-shows-pull-Ugly-Betty-poncho-style.html
At this point, after the fake Carrie Fisher pic, I need to see the boobs in order to confirm that this is indeed Kelly.
Check out the boots, CD.
http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/cKPLYkfg041/Kelly+Brook+Food+Shops/ZZXNpm4YJAb
OMG – boots & roots.
Goddamn. This is ugly.
if bitch threw her bottoms at me, fuck I’d probably put them on too.
“scousewives”
LOL
Housewives with scurvy?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desperate_Scousewives
Unbelievable.
And I was sure it was a Photoboy typo.
take it, take the money, just quit pointing that gun at me.
I was thinking the same shit.
I hate it when bitches smoosh their boobs like that. Ugh! Gross!
Yep, if they want some just go get the fun bags installed. This looks stupid.
It actually looks a bit painful. Sides if they need squeezing, there’s me. (Not that I think she’s that hot but, you know….)
Oh my God, she queefed.
Why won’t my hair do this when I put it in hot rollers? :(
mundanes don’t have access to the same hot rollers as the 1%
because your hair is real and her hair is fake.
You need to use a curling iron (most stylists use two different sizes) and change the direction of the wave (curl in, curl out) throughout your hair. You also have to make sure your hair isn’t too clean and slippery. Ohh why can’t we be rich and have live-in hairdressers? :)
How does Classy-Shoe-Mart carry enough inventory for this fashionista?
“No, Mom, I don’t need to press record, I said there’s a guy here giving ME a blow OUT”
win
Is there a way to be 41 and dress to show off your excellent body without coming off desperate to reclaim your lost youth and just all-around sad? I’m just wondering.
Yes, there is. For example the LBD never goes out of style.
Shauna is a train wreck.
LBD?
Little Black Dress
First, you don’t fill your lips with botox until you look like a puffer fish. Second, you don’t wear dime store hooker wear and lastly she needs to get better taste in shoes.
Filling lips with Botox = doing it wrong
Ask Kate Beckinsale.
^^ Bingo!
No and no.
Way to tan that elbow, sloppy bitch.
Stories like this is why stoning is still legal in some countries,
Remember the time you were nine months pregnant at the liquor store?
At least the display is Veuve Clicquot ans not some cheap California stuff….
the real question is how does a woman this ugly get pregnant? Pretend she is on Roofies at a frat pig call?
Not veuve clicoquot
http://www.blogcdn.com/www.luxist.com/media/2010/06/veuve-clicquot-bottles-580cs060710-1276709453.jpg
La Grand Dame is not that great. The regular Veuve in the green bottle is the best or the Rose if you are feeling fancy.
You sure she’s not at some awesome barbeque sauce store ?
Really Ricky? It was just a wisecrack, no reason to fight about it, however it looked like it to me:
http://www.lilleauxvins.com/imgs/vins/champagneveuveclicquotlagrandedame_20100305113450.png
oh, yeah, see i’m too poor for that shit.
Aw. She’s so adorable.
Also: Wine?
It’s best to start them early. Wine is an acquired taste.
The Ryan Seacrest method of touching a breast while keeping down vomit.
fuh realz
I’d say the chick on the right has the biggest package.
Pregnant belly buttons freak me out. I hate pregnant belly buttons.
Can’t you just smell that intoxicating aroma of Ben-Gay and K-Y Jelly?
So, wait, I’m confused. I thought she was supposed to be pretty. This is opposite.
Sweater Bar Refaeli is exponentially less attractive than Bikini Bar Refaeli. It’s physics.
And apparently no makeup Bar is hideous. This is why I like women who wear very little makeup.
If this is hideous, I’ll take hideous.
yay no makeup! happy to say i don’t wear the stuff and get compliments.
“according to the pop up timers, those are done now.”
“Whoops, such as! I forgot to take off my bikini in the spray tan booth!”
so………….we’re talking prayer mat now?
It’s awesome to see Dolly without her wig and make-up on for once,
but man, Seacrest makes a bad drag queen!
Ooof fa!
Finally! A dress that makes you look busty and flat-chested at the same time.
lol
Nobody believed her when she cried about about the gremlins on the wing.
classic!
Beautiful!
In today’s nobody news, one nobody feels up another nobody. But first, the People of Walmart!
The look of someone with a perfectly-sized buttplug.
BA HAHAHAHAHA
Wow! Hipsters come in brown too? Who knew…
Wow! Dipsters come in brown too? Who knew….
Fixed it.
“Oh God! I completely forgot to be a decent human being.”
Hey Jenelle-Get the munchies a lot?
Those thought balloons coming out of his head are appropriately empty.
MOO
LOL. I’ve missed your moo comments about this cunty cash cow. Way to get 2012 up and running!
That’s the first time Dolly ever sat on a mans lap and didn’t feel a penis.
Stupid girl thinks a mug shot is a good career move.
Yes, Why is she so happy here?
See Katie? Post-partum nti-depressants really do work!
Even when they’re veerrryyy post-post-post-partum!
it takes a real douche to lounge on his boat while it’s still docked.
Well I guess we can count 2 people in this shot that enjoy having plastic things shoved into them….
This is not news. That is the official handshake of Mauritius.
!!!
She’ll never be one of those Tinkerbelle tiny pregnant ladies….Jen gets BIG.
Who the hell is-whoa! That’s some nasty cleavage!
Your could use that thing as a storage locker.
Attention Deficit Disorder. There are two apps for that.
She may not be Judy Garland, but for Seacrest, she’ll do.
Holy shit, that face could sour milk.
“So, left hand, I’m like, totally getting my hair done.”
“OMG right hand!!! Text me when you’re done :)”
lol
Awesome