The Crap We Missed – Monday 9.24.12

September 24th, 2012 // 792 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed where unintentional comedy mingles with the random vulval pageantry that lacks the gravitas for Fish’s penis jokesmithing. That said, we’ve got the Savages press tour offering up another amazing gem, the Mila Kunis crush getting officially put to bed, Mickey Rourke being the reason those fuckers charge you $9 for insurance when you rent a tux, Bill Clinton getting too old for this shit, ditto for Barbra Streisand (See what I did there?), and finally, that bodyguard already has Heidi Klum fetching his coffee.

I know your pain well, Heidi *wipes tear,*

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Jonah Hill Headphones
    Commented on this photo:

    “I understand that you little guys start out with your woobies and you think they’re great… and they are, they are terrific. But pretty soon, a woobie isn’t enough. You’re out on the street trying to score an electric blanket, or maybe a quilt. And the next thing you know, you’re strung out on bedspreads Ken. That’s serious.”

  2. Zachary Quinto
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “OMG! I was NOT staring at John Hamm’s penis!”

  3. Jeremy Irons Pants Tucked Into Boots
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck’s the deal with those stupid boots? Last pic I saw of him he was wearing the same shit. Is this some meta-ironic anti-hipster statement?

  4. Elisabetta Gregoraci Bikini Paladini Fashion Show Milan Womens Fashion Week
    jimbo
    Commented on this photo:

    now that is something i could get behind

  5. Mickey Rourke Gold Vest
    Mohawk Disco
    Commented on this photo:

    Forget high voltage whips. He should have used that vest against Iron Man.

  6. Mila Kunis Ashton Kutcher Matching Clothes
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    For her he shaves.

  7. Estella Warren
    Anastasia Beaverhausen
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought from the thumbnail this would be something good.

  8. Simon Cowell Carmen Electra Dating
    Commented on this photo:

    the moment when they both realize he can afford her & 2 more just like her.

  9. Katy Pery Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    She IS a woman of many (two) talents!

  10. Jeremy Davies Leslie Mann Judd Apatow Emmys
    Anastasia Beaverhausen
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude on left needs rehab.

  11. Megan Fox Pregnant Belly Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s still thinner than Jessica Simpson.

  12. Billy Connolly Wont Back Down Premiere
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like a John Cleese character.

  13. Hugh Jackman Wet Suit Oscar Ava
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice guns.

  14. Bill Clinton
    Commented on this photo:

    He still thinks harass is 2 words. He thinks it is spelled her ass.

  15. Simon Cowell Carmen Electra Dating
    Matt
    Commented on this photo:

    The smug look on his face says, “Mine are bigger.”

  16. Aaron Taylor-Johnson Penis Outline Costume Kick Ass 2 Set
    Commented on this photo:

    You’re in Canada, man. I know our dollar is high right now, but throw a roll of loonies in there, not dimes.

  17. Benico Del Toro John Travolta Oliver Stone San Sebastian Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Guess which one loves the cock.

  18. Barbra Streisand Legs Boots Clinton Global Initiative
    Anastasia Beaverhausen
    Commented on this photo:

    Madonna’s doppelgänger.

  19. Katy Pery Cleavage
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    She can’t sing worth shit, she’s autotuned to the extreme on
    her recordings, she lip-synchs in concert, she has nothing
    intelligent or wise or witty to say, she has fucking horrible taste in
    men, BUT…. she’s got great tits.
    I guess that’s what sells records these days…

  20. Aaron Paul Emmys
    YAAR
    Commented on this photo:

    You don’t make fun of Jesse, you twats.

  21. Rumer Willis Cleavage Pre Emmy Party
    Commented on this photo:

    The government should try to kill these ugly rumers.

  22. Megan Fox Pregnant Belly Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Behind her you can see her husband sitting next to the big, blue dumpster they now live in now that nobody wants to masturbate to her photos anymore.

  23. Bill Clinton
    Commented on this photo:

    “fuck all a y’all, boring fuckers”

  24. Hugh Jackman Wet Suit Oscar Ava
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like someone’s about to shoot another Wolverine movie.

  25. Nicole Kidman Emmys
    Mohawk Disco
    Commented on this photo:

    If they ever need a wicked witch for the remake of Oz. She gives me the creeps every time I see her.

  26. Elisabetta Gregoraci Bikini Paladini Fashion Show Milan Womens Fashion Week
    Anastasia Beaverhausen
    Commented on this photo:

    The FUCK is this?

  27. Aaron Paul Emmys
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Open wider, Aaron.
    Open wider.

  28. Benico Del Toro John Travolta Oliver Stone San Sebastian Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    YES! There WILL be a sequel to the Three Stooges movie!

  29. Benico Del Toro John Travolta Oliver Stone San Sebastian Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    An early, failed commercial for “The Hair Club for Men.”

  30. Megan Fox Pregnant Belly Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Ruined.

  31. Jim Carrey Prosthetic Nose Kick Ass 2 Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Jim Carrey? Then that’s QUITE the make up job,

  32. Heidi Klum Nipples Carrying Daughter Lou
    Chimpout2012
    Commented on this photo:

    THAT scar never goes away, Heidi…hope it was worth it.

  33. Lady Gaga Cleavage See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Oh dear, I’m so embarrassed! I forgot to do anything odd to my shoulders!”

  34. Russell Simmons Leila Lopes South-South Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    same comment as the one I had for Cowell.

  35. Billy Connolly Wont Back Down Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Funniest guy ever, once you muscle your ear past the thickest Scottish brogue in the solar system. Problem is, you can never hear a Scott talk again without exploding in laughter.

  36. Jonah Hill Headphones
    Tidbit
    Commented on this photo:

    nnyeeehhhhhh……I just filled my diaper.

  37. Megan Fox Pregnant Belly Yoga Pants
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    From B-Lister to Footnote in 2 years.
    That’s what happens when you have no talent, your only asset is your looks, and you turn around and bite the hand that feeds you.
    Give it another year, and it’ll be “Megan who?”

  38. Heidi Klum Nipples Carrying Daughter Lou
    Commented on this photo:

    She has her Mom’s nothing.

  39. Anne Hathaway Cameltoe Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    When your tights are fitting loose on you, it’s probably time to order some Chinese or sumthin’.

  40. Jim Carrey Prosthetic Nose Kick Ass 2 Set
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    This time he’s a Neanderthal who can’t calm the fuck down for a minute.

  41. Barbra Streisand Legs Boots Clinton Global Initiative
    Commented on this photo:

    Her and Penny Marshall are totally interchangeable.

  42. Nicole Kidman Emmys
    Commented on this photo:

    “Why, yes, as a matter of fact. I HAVE been to all 64 of them!”

  43. Aaron Taylor-Johnson Penis Outline Costume Kick Ass 2 Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice juice box. Goes nicely with your toddler junk.

  44. Katy Pery Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    I appreciate her efforts to put her tits next to her muff so I can ogle both with minimal eye movement. Kudos, Katie Perry. Kudos.

  45. Simon Cowell Carmen Electra Dating
    Mohawk Disco
    Commented on this photo:

    Carmen is a smart girl. Keeps her purse strategically located. Nobody wants to catch douchebag cooties.

  46. Anne Hathaway Cameltoe Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    what, is she auditioning for a vampire flick? cuz she’s got the pale/dead thing down. and yeah^ eat a fuckin sandwich already.

    • EricLr

      She got herself turned into a vampire when that was all the rage. Unfortunately, the trend faded and there’s no cure.

  47. Zachary Quinto
    Tidbit
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d say the standard “invisible penis”, but I’m sure there’s an incoming one just out of frame.

  48. Mila Kunis Ashton Kutcher Matching Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    didn’t he tell her she would never make it in movies when they were on the 70s show? Now she’s a success its all on

  49. Ed Harris Gold Tooth HBO Emmy Afterparty
    Commented on this photo:

    “That’s right. I’m so wealthy I can afford a silver tooth!”

  50. Jonah Hill Headphones
    Mohawk Disco
    Commented on this photo:

    I was listening to Beyonce’s Naughty Girl as I saw this pic and fell of the chair laughing.

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