Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed where unintentional comedy mingles with the random vulval pageantry that lacks the gravitas for Fish’s penis jokesmithing. That said, we’ve got the Savages press tour offering up another amazing gem, the Mila Kunis crush getting officially put to bed, Mickey Rourke being the reason those fuckers charge you $9 for insurance when you rent a tux, Bill Clinton getting too old for this shit, ditto for Barbra Streisand (See what I did there?), and finally, that bodyguard already has Heidi Klum fetching his coffee.
I know your pain well, Heidi *wipes tear,*
- Photo Boy
Click Here To Start The Gallery
Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Something is off about this photo…
:: Throws her in the trunk. ::
All better.
Fancy name! I feel fancier just reading it!
Didn’t she just have a baby?
Remember when parents used to take breathers because a baby was a big responsibility?
” And look, here comes some of the nominees for Weirdest Participants in a Threesome…”
I realize that this will go against all the values and principles taught to me by The Superficial but… I like Simon.
This. Simon tells people when they suck. I admire that.
If Kim Kardashian ever won an Emmy, this is the first thing she would do with it too.
On a similar topic, I believe her wedding special won best Set Design.
“Hey, bud? I’ve gotto go. I’ve got my big towel and a liter of water and the ice cream truck just pulled up”
Two drunks and a twink walk into a bar…
Remember when she was Luke Perry’s love interest in 90210?
Me neither.
Wishing he had an intern to stick that in
I love the happy dog…
“…oh, you have a bit of credibility there. Let me remove that for you.”
Every woman I’ve ever met has claimed she loves a man with a stainless steel cap on his tooth.
I know perception is relative, but it seems to me she looks better than the last time she visited.
Allow me to rephrase…perception is subjective, and from my point of view she looks better than the last time she visited. But what the fuck do I know?…I’m really fucked up in the head.
Leave the premiere. Take the Connolly.
Are we sure the kids are the only ones with cancer? Yikes.
Welcome to the exclusive screening of “The Son of Mork and Mindy.:
[img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/26/MorkMindy-340_255.jpg[/img]
@ liam, she does too! Weird!
i meant @ anderson pooper – she should wax it
“This is Big Bird to Big Bird Leader…Big Bird to Big Bird Leader…come in, please. Unable to score any soft serve…Big Bird Leader., please advise…”
Couric and her need to fight. There can only be one.
Ok, it’s $100 for how many songs?
I Imagine it’s harder to guide with one-sided reins.
Damn fine pair of legs.
God damn I would love to wreck that, I want those thighs tightly wrapped around my head
“Are you sure this is how Riverdance got started?”
She may look like she’s horking up a microphone after a long night of Cotton Candy Cocktails, and she may be in an outfit that was tailored to say “there’s a reason I usually wear knee-length skirts and heels”, but she still has her ballet fingers on. You gotta give her the ballet fingers.
So are we just making every name unisex now?
Ding! The bellybutton popped. Baby’s ready!
Not only can I wear matching shirts with my girlfriend, but how cool is it that we wear the same size too?
Travolta: Psst. Oliver. Can you move your hand back? And to the left?
“I can’t believe I’m sitting here listening to this bullshit when I could be home watching the Kim Kardashian sex tape, with a bottle of Jack, and a Cuban CEE-gar!”
She has some miles on her, and she doesn’t look as good as she once did, but she’s still an attractive, incredibly intelligent woman with whom I’d love to sit and chat. As long as she let me play with her tits.
So a guy’s decides to bite on a bullet and kiss Rumer Willis. So he slowly works his way up to her lips, and at exactly the right moment…ACKKKK! Cigarette breath…
She does look better than just six weeks ago (prepare yourselves before you click):
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2189799/The-post-exercise-glow-Nicole-Eggert-determined-return-Baywatch-glory-days-continues-gruelling-exercise-regime.html
Good on you, Nicole. I wish Weight Watchers had made a deal with you. You seem determined as all hell.
From this vantage point she appears to have beautiful gams.
Talentless chav-scum, apologies from England.
What a pleasant sight for a Monday morning. She is such a ray of sunshine!
“No no no honey, don’t sit down. There’s no chair behind you yet.”
“I’m just here in Madrid until tomorrow. Then I will trek to Pamplona where I’m going to chase those fucking bulls!”
Tattoos. Why?
I’ll bet if you pulled down her pants and looked real close, you’d find a little tattoo that says, “George Clooney was here.”
Ya know, Billy, we all love you madly. But it’s time someone told you, “THAT’S THE UGLIEST FUCKING JACKET EVER MADE!”
So now let’s go back to try-hard Sharon Stone with her little plaything in Milan and talk again about she’s still looking sexy, shall we?
When I saw her in Lady Hawk I almost fainted. One of the most beautiful women to ever walk the earth.
Did you see her ass in ‘Into the Night’? If not, you really should!!!
Absolutely. Several times. Along with a quick titty flash. I really enjoyed that flick and watch it whenever I see it on the tube.
Italian girls always look so much better when they’re pouting.
There’s a new superhero in town – it’s ‘Supperman’ .
Geddy Lee : the retirement years.
Nicole should be applauded! This woman is trying to lose weight the old fashioned way via diet, exercise and public shaming!
“A whole lot of these goodwill ambassadors look nuthin like Angelina Jolie. We gotta get that Kat Dennings interested in sustainable development, if I’m to sustain my development, know what I mean, wink wink, and all tha…well, what have we…aw, goddamnit, not Merkel again.”
“In the movies, you know me as the deranged and beautiful Catwoman. But in real life, unbeknownst to you all, I am…HATWOMAN!”
Three Invisible Dicks- Part 3: The “Rear Entry” Edition