The Crap We Missed – Monday 9.23.13

September 23rd, 2013 // 471 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed which somehow manages to only include one pic from last night’s Emmys and it’s this one right here of David Charvet goosing a man because a.) Remember Baywatch? and b.) I have the emotional maturity of an eight-year-old. That fact alone is the answer to every time you’ve ever clicked through one of these galleries and asked yourself “What the hell is this shit and why am I looking at it?” So with that in mind, here’s Constantine Maroulis making that vagina-hand thingy from The Sopranos, John Travolta pointing at his pee-pee that he shows to other boys, this Florida woman rubbing Cee Lo‘s head because she knows that’s how you protect yourself from their voodoo magic, and finally, Matthew Broderick who should know better by now that you never stand directly behind her so she can’t see you. She spooks easy.

Wanna guess how long I’ve been waiting for a pic of him looking injured so I could use that joke? The answer is yes, of course I’m lonely,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Matthew Broderick Arm In Sling
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Bet next time you won’t stand right behind her when you’re shoeing her.

  2. Cee Lo Green Redneck Lady Rubbing Head
    Dom Perinyawn
    Commented on this photo:

    “Dear Cracker … “

  3. Jonah Hill Workout Clothes
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    “I kid you not. He stopped the car in the middle of the street. Got out. Ran over to us…And spent a full fucking hour telling us about what it was like to work with Martin Scorsese.”

  4. Kate Gosselin No Makeup Angry Face
    Commented on this photo:

    “I wonder how much Jon makes in tips as a waiter and I wonder if I can get my greedy little claws on that?”

  5. Tyra Banks Cleavage 4th Annual WIE Symposium
    I'mCool
    Commented on this photo:

    Whether that stupid expression is frozen on her face or not, that’s exactly how she always looks to me.

  6. Tyra Banks Cleavage 4th Annual WIE Symposium
    Hugh G. Rection
    Commented on this photo:

    Once upon a time, a top model. Now she looks like she got a ride home from Chris Brown.

  7. Danny Trejo Alexa Vega Cleavage Machete Kills Premiere Fantastic Fest
    Commented on this photo:

    When the hell did Alexa Vega turn into a babe?!!?

  8. Heather Graham Nipples No Bra Baby Bump
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    I have never wanted to fuck a Teletubbie so bad in my life.

  9. Karrueche Tran Butt Bikini Zipper Tattoo
    Hugh G. Rection
    Commented on this photo:

    From this angle, you can’t see six inches dangling in front

  10. Mickey Rourke Skinny Jeans
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    FREAK!!!!!!!!

  11. Chris Brown Crotch Grab Pulling Shirt Up To Show Off Abs iHeart Radio Music Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    “I know.. I know punchy… There there.
    We’ll get that mean girl holding up the Woman beater sign..”

  12. Jonah Hill Workout Clothes
    Cuddles
    Commented on this photo:

    Eight months ago, Bob’s testicles were removed. Then hormone therapy. He developed bitch tits because his testosterone was too high and his body upped the estrogen. And that was where I fit….

  13. Anne Burrell Pink Hair Riding Bike In Skirt
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m not sure who Anne Burrell is, but I’m guessing professional softball player?

  14. Tyra Banks Cleavage 4th Annual WIE Symposium
    Commented on this photo:

    “In answer to your questions…yes, I am considered to be a supermodel…and, no, I have not recently been in a horriblty deforming automobile accident.”

  15. Tiger Chen Keanu Reeves Tim League Man of Tai Chi Fantastic Fest
    Hugh G. Rection
    Commented on this photo:

    At this point, I’m more likely to go to a Farrah Abraham movie than a Keanu Reeves movie.

  16. Geri Halliwell Bikini
    Hugh G. Rection
    Commented on this photo:

    Titty Spice

  17. David Beckham Smirking Ross Brawn Covering Ears Formula One World Championship
    Commented on this photo:

    “That’s right bitch… Your senses can’t handle my awesomeness..”

  18. Kelly Brook Cleavage Bikini Instagram
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    Words are not enough…

  19. Val Kilmer Sunburned Face Hoodie
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Casting: Impossible Ghost Career Protocol

  20. Monica Bellucci Nipples See Through Wet Dress On The Milky Road Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Show me where this magical road is.. Please? Somebody?

  21. Khloe Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt iHeart Radio Music Festival
    Hugh G. Rection
    Commented on this photo:

    Leia: I’d just as soon kiss a wookie.
    Han: I can arrange that.

  22. TLC Cleavage iHeart Radio Music Festival
    Cuddles
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s really sweet of them to wear actual airplane wreckage in honor of their fallen group member.

  23.  John Travolta Qingdao Oriental Movie Metropolis
    Commented on this photo:

    “Let’s see Michael Flately do this with a wig on….”

  24. Farrah Abraham Huge Fake Tits Cleavage Smoking Hookah Vivid Cabaret LA Launch Grand Opening Party
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like the hot neighbor mom you wanted to take your virginity in 1978. Except she’s now 35 years older and reeks of Malibu Bay Breezes and shame.

  25.  John Travolta Qingdao Oriental Movie Metropolis
    Icehawg
    Commented on this photo:

    I just don’t. Get. It. Why does everyone say I am gay. Look at how hetero I am. *points to penis*

  26. Lea Michele Holding Stomach
    Commented on this photo:

    Leah, sorry sweetie but you have something to sag for you to hold up…

  27. Kim Cattrall Cleavage TimeTalk Interview
    Commented on this photo:

    “EXCUSE ME! My eyes are up HERE! Right under all the wrinkles!”

  28. David Beckham Smirking Ross Brawn Covering Ears Formula One World Championship
    Pilin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Why Posh spice is singing again?

  29. Tiger Chen Keanu Reeves Tim League Man of Tai Chi Fantastic Fest
    Icehawg
    Commented on this photo:

    “So…have you finally given up completely Mr. Reeves?”

    “YES! Finally….someone gets it!!” *fist pump*

  30. David Beckham Smirking Ross Brawn Covering Ears Formula One World Championship
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    “I believe the French call it ‘menage a trois…’”
    “lalalalaLALALA NOT LISTENING NOT LISTENING!”

  31. Karrueche Tran Butt Bikini Zipper Tattoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Even that stupid tattoo can’t ruin the view!

  32. Damian Lewis Shaved Head Clove Cigarette Chateau Marmont
    Icehawg
    Commented on this photo:

    Lex. Fucking. Luthor, baby! Suck it Cranston.

  33. Matthew Broderick Arm In Sling
    Commented on this photo:

    I heard he got kicked by a horse

  34. Cee Lo Green Redneck Lady Rubbing Head
    George Nitales
    Commented on this photo:

    “Look, is a black Beluga….!!

  35.  John Travolta Qingdao Oriental Movie Metropolis
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    A: The hair.
    B: The totally natural smooth skin.
    C: The not-being-gay.

    Which is the one lie you’re willing to forgive if he’d just give up on the other 2?

  36. Jonah Hill Workout Clothes
    Icehawg
    Commented on this photo:

    We can’t see it, but I’d wager the back-seat of that car is just covered in dropped names.

  37. Farrah Abraham Huge Fake Tits Cleavage Smoking Hookah Vivid Cabaret LA Launch Grand Opening Party
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s ugly for a regular girl. She’s ugly for a porn star. She’s just flat out ugly.

  38. Anne Burrell Pink Hair Riding Bike In Skirt
    ultra
    Commented on this photo:

    hulk hogan’s really let himself go.

  39. Constantine Maroulis The Little Mermaid Screening
    Dom Perinyawn
    Commented on this photo:

    “You want I should show yous where my vagina is?”

  40. Courtney Stodden Huge Fake Tits Cleavage Midriff
    Icehawg
    Commented on this photo:

    Awwww….dude in the background was just readying his chloroform rag when the photog ruined the chance.

  41. Farrah Abraham Huge Fake Tits Cleavage Smoking Hookah Vivid Cabaret LA Launch Grand Opening Party
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    Probably not the only hookah in this photo to get smoked that night.

  42. Aubrey ODay Buttcheeks See Through Skirt iHeart Radio Music Festival
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought she was a lesbian. I guess the women got rid of her after the men got rid of her. Now, she’s onto hipster douches.

  43. Kate Gosselin No Makeup Angry Face
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone was very kind to photoshop all the recyclable cans out of that shopping cart and replace them with bags of groceries so she almost looks a real person with a home to go to and everything.

  44. David Beckham Smirking Ross Brawn Covering Ears Formula One World Championship
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugh… I can hear him rubbing his balls through his pocket.

  45. Cee Lo Green Redneck Lady Rubbing Head
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Cee Lo Green meets the ghostwriter of the Paula Deen Book of Social Etiquette.

  46.  John Travolta Qingdao Oriental Movie Metropolis
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    “I feel pretty! Oh so pretty! I feel pretty and witty and g…um, TOTALLY FUCKING STRAIGHT, MAN.”

  47. TLC Cleavage iHeart Radio Music Festival
    Dom Perinyawn
    Commented on this photo:

    Future tag team champions.

  48. Danny Trejo Alexa Vega Cleavage Machete Kills Premiere Fantastic Fest
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Danny Trejo does a lot of flying in small aircraft so he carries his own flotation device.

  49. Tyra Banks Cleavage 4th Annual WIE Symposium
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    “Wow. She looks weird.” – LaToya Jackson

  50. Kate Gosselin No Makeup Angry Face
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Jon had to clean vomit off the floor of the men’s bathroom yesterday and I’d still say he lucked out.

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