The Crap We Missed – Monday 8.8.11

August 8th, 2011 // 863 Comments

“Babe, could you please stop making eye contact with the perverts staring at Minka Kelly? They can’t ejaculate when you do that.”

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed featuring adorable, little Suri Cruise pushing her daddy in her stroller, Sinead O’Connor sticking it to the Catholic Church through the power of borderline obesity, My So Called Lactating and Lacey Schwimmer one more time, except in my defense, bikini.

Captain Picard shouldn’t be allowed to wear normal people clothes. It frightens me,

- The Superficial

The Crap We Missed

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Britney Spears
    Commented on this photo:

    There ain’t no donuts here.

  2. Sinead O'Connor Midriff Belly
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    god gets pissed off when you rip up pictures of his crew on tv.

  3. Molly Ringwald
    Commented on this photo:

    So…water weight?

  4. Drew Carey Vespa Helmet
    Commented on this photo:

    Shouldn’t he be in Cleveland? Or dead?

  5. Shaun White Teen Choice Awards TCA
    Commented on this photo:

    Peter Frampton rules!

  6. Minka Kelly Cleavage
    SSHGuru
    Commented on this photo:

    She needs Depends…

  7. Kate Gosselin
    Senor Trout
    Commented on this photo:

    How’s someone with eight kids never seen in a photo with them?

  8. Kate Gosselin
    Commented on this photo:

    Why would she need to be on The Today Show? Her only talent is having all those kids that one time.

  9. Jamie Jungers Tiger Woods Mistress DUI
    Commented on this photo:

    Tiger’s new endorsement from Valtrex in 3..2..1..

  10. Sinead O'Connor Midriff Belly
    Protesting DWT*'s rough hiatus policies
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh yeah? And how do you know, this is not my favorite comedian of all time Benny Hill?

    Side note: I kept my word. Considering this post will remain here in the morning, I just gave you a little shimmer (close right?) of how it feels to time travel.

  11. Jaime Pressly
    Commented on this photo:

    If you stare at her eyes for 1 minute she turns into that angry orange thing on YouTube.

  12. Jonah Hill Skinny Jeans
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    not skinny enough for women’s jeans quite yet, jonah.

  13. Jonah Hill Skinny Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    Muffin top.

  14. Jonah Hill Skinny Jeans
    SteveG
    Commented on this photo:

    baby steps Jonah. Skinny jeans was a bad choice.

    • maybe I’m getting old and out of touch with hip fashions of today’s youth…but “skinny jeans” looks an awful lot like “sweaty chafing nuts” to me.

      Do kids today not have the massive junk package that us old timers are lugging around?

    • DKNY

      Skinny jeans are always a bad choice unless you are a homosexual.

      For all you “hipsters” out there, everyone except you and your kind see your skinny jeans and immediately assume you’re gay. Ask around if you don’t believe me.

      • Colin

        Ugh. Fat hipsters wearing skinny jeans. I own one pair of skinny jeans, and I only bust those out in case of an emergency. And I have an excuse, because I have a size 30 waist and am ACTUALLY A FAG.

  15. Britney Spears
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “No ma’am, this isn’t Burger King, it’s Starbucks. No, no, Jack in the Box is tonight . That’s right. Ok, put your shoes on.”

  16. Sinead O'Connor Midriff Belly
    Commented on this photo:

    Daniel Radcliffe had a sex change operation?

  17. Tiffani Thiessen
    Commented on this photo:

    I remember Kelly Kapowski. I’d do her.

  18. Joe Rogan
    Senor Trout
    Commented on this photo:

    An Affliction shirt. What a surprise.

  19. Drew Carey Vespa Helmet
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Failing on so many levels, he wins.

  20. Tom Cruise Katie Holmes Katy Perry Concert
    Commented on this photo:

    Stop! Hammer Time!

  21. Hayley Joel Osment
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Then the evil fairy said “I will make you the most famous sad little pinched face boy in the world but in return you will stay that way for ever”. And foolishly the boy agreed.

  22. Cameron Diaz Teen Choice Awards TCA
    Commented on this photo:

    BRAINSSS……

    • x

      ugh…every other motherfucking thread?? Please come up with a new-ish zombie reference…we thank you in advance

  23. Cameron Diaz Teen Choice Awards TCA
    sooooooosuperficial
    Commented on this photo:

    Last time I saw a mouth like that it had a hook in it.

  24. Joe Rogan
    stratacat
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t tell where Affliction stops and Ed Hardy begins.

  25. Jude Law Scruffy Beard
    Commented on this photo:

    “Well, are you gonna sign it or are you gonna stand there and jerk me off? Whoa, really?”

  26. Ian Somerhalder Teen Choice Awards TCA
    Commented on this photo:

    That is the look of a man who’s going to get some choice teen at the Teen Choice awards.

  27. Daniel Craig Harrison Ford Olivia Wilde Cowboys & Aliens
    Commented on this photo:

    Are they remaking Regarding Henry?

  28. Paris Hilton Michael Champion
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like the Terminator just spotted Sarah Connor.

  29. Tom Cruise Katie Holmes Katy Perry Concert
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    Five minutes later, Cuba Gooding, Jr. came out of the car and announced his conversion to Scientology.

  30. Brad Pitt Zahara
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    (Jesus christ. Which one is this again? Shit, I can’t even tell if it’s a boy or girl)

    “HEY Angie! Where do you want it???”

  31. Antonio Banderas
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d kill myself too if I married that poorly.

  32. chev70

    Fit bird.

  33. Lea Michele Glee Premiere
    SteveG
    Commented on this photo:

    Taken at the exact moment a gust of warm air blew up inside her snow-pussy.

  34. Wilson Cruz
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice tits. That’s Serena, right?

  35. Wilson Cruz
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude needs a sports bra.

  36. Jojo Levesque Teen Choice Awards TCA
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey “Jojo” are you 18 yet? Your skirt and shoes say yet, but your babyface says “check I.D.”

  37. Flavor Flav Crown
    Commented on this photo:

    This picture is why people are afraid to go to the dentist.

  38. Antonio Banderas
    Commented on this photo:

    “If you call me the Latino Obama again, I’ll blow you’re brains out….my friend.”

  39. Tiffani Thiessen
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Saved by the Bell: the middle aged and fat years

  40. Patrick Stewart
    Ras Malfoof
    Commented on this photo:

    Captain Jean-Luc Picard has apparently never heard of dressing his age. Or maybe I’m just jealous of his boyish figure.

  41. Jonah Hill Skinny Jeans
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Ok, now he just looks like he’s dying.

  42. Patrick Stewart
    Commented on this photo:

    Metrosexual Willie Nelson looks metrosexual.

  43. Lacey Schwimmer Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like she left her “indoor” head on for the pool party.

  44. Jamie Jungers Tiger Woods Mistress DUI
    TheImmortalWombat
    Commented on this photo:

    Note the BJ smear on the right lower lip? Clearly it wasn’t a good one, or she wouldn’t have been arrested.

  45. Hayley Joel Osment
    Commented on this photo:

    I see stupid people looking at the Superifical.

  46. Ian Somerhalder Teen Choice Awards TCA
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    I literally beat a kid up for making this face at a beer pong tournament in colege when I missed a shot in the semi’s.

    • I literally beat up a kid for thinking beer pong was cool.

      Seriously, you need a game to get drunk? When I was in college we’d slam beer bongs and shots of JD, then fuck whatever chick was drunkest. You kids today make me sick.

    • If it weren’t for drunken hookups regretted the next day, half of you little bastards wouldn’t be here…and the other half got their abortions paid for by 3 or 4 dudes and kept your skank moms in drinking money to buy Boon’s Farm for another week.

  47. Jojo Levesque Teen Choice Awards TCA
    Masha
    Commented on this photo:

    Who?

  48. Hayley Joel Osment
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like an adult-sized fetus.

  49. Joe Rogan
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    I heard he was “Solid Gold” tattooed on his butt cheeks with an arrow pointing to his asshole.

  50. Wilson Cruz
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    “Neo, this is loco”

Leave A Comment