The Crap We Missed – Monday 8.29.11

“Mom?” Ke$ha asked, sensing her journey was, at last, at an end.

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed which somehow managed to swim its way out of the afterbirth of the VMAs for your viewing pleasure, so snuggle it close. On that note, Photo Boy and I are pretty much beat over here, so let’s cut to the chase: In this new post-apocalyptic world, horses drive cars, midgets smuggle themselves in suitcases seeing as they’re now currency and old men take what they want, ass cracks rippling with force.

Is it creepy if I say, “My, how JoJo has grown up?” Because she has and I mean that in a strictly legal child-bearing way. (Read: I Googled her age.),

- The Superficial

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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN