The Crap We Missed – Monday 8.26.13

August 26th, 2013 // 670 Comments

Welcome to a post-awards-show-weekend Monday edition of The Crap We Missed. Roughly translated, that means there’s a ton of shit in here. I’m tempted to point you right to the end of this gallery for my favorite selections from the VMAs, starting here, followed by Tommy Lee DJaculating and all ending with news that Miss Butt Brazil is getting its own show. I can’t wait for you to get there, but I don’t want you to miss Flynn‘s 21st birthday party that’s supposedly taking place in a nightclub, but we all know it’s an IHOP, Gerard Depardieu still wondering why nobody took his cookie order yet, or John Malkovich trying to explain to this little girl why he’s wearing her grandmother’s pajamas.

Wait, Marc Anthony was at that Scientology Gala thing too?

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Carla Howe Melissa Howe Bikini Hugh Hefner Playboy Mansion
    Commented on this photo:

    And notice when he got married, we NEVER see his wife anymore. Publicity stunt?

  2. Sarah Jessica Parker Swimsuit
    Commented on this photo:

    For as old as she is, she has a rockin’ bod.

  3. Marc Anthony Kneeling Down Putting Face On Stage
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s upset that his palimony stopped and has to work for a living now.

  4. Orlando Bloom Post Romeo And Juliet Performance Broadway
    Commented on this photo:

    Got tweaked?

  5. Miley Cyrus Buttcheeks Bangerz Shirt Instagram
    Hugh Jazz
    Commented on this photo:

    The WORST way to promote a new hot dog line ever.

  6. Willow Smith Jaden Smith Arrogant Faces VMAs
    thecrazybetty
    Commented on this photo:

    posers.

  7. Evan Ross Joe Simpson Revolve Beach House
    Commented on this photo:

    Joe just uncorked…his ass.

  8. Marc Anthony Kneeling Down Putting Face On Stage
    Hugh Jazz
    Commented on this photo:

    (Sniff) someone did the splits here (sniff) a week ago (sniff) hispanic girl (sniff) mid 20s (sniff sniff) 3 days to menstruation.

  9. Harrison Ford Yelling At Crowd
    Commented on this photo:

    “Fuck off!”

  10. Terrence Howard Skullcap Indiana Jones Hat Yellow Sneakers
    Commented on this photo:

    So gangster with the scarf on his head.

  11. Farrah Abraham Cleavage Implants In Touch 6th Annual Idols & Icons Event
    Commented on this photo:

    How does she an ‘icon’ OR an ‘idol?’

    More like seat-filler.

  12. Kate Moss Nipple Slip
    Commented on this photo:

    With ALL the money she has earned and judging by the rock on her finger she CAN afford to get a real grill.

  13. Rihanna Tight Minidress VMAs Afterparty
    Commented on this photo:

    Judging by the look on the woman behind her: NOW we ALL know who farted in the elevator!

  14. Katy Perry Wearing Grill Leather Bra Miniskirt Knee High Socks VMAs Afterparty
    Commented on this photo:

    OH Katy! Nice try at looking bad ass, Smurfette.

  15. Foxy Brown Cleavage Spandex Dress Long Blonde Extensions VMAs
    Commented on this photo:

    Once again. Tit tats for the tacky.

  16. Tommy Lee Coked Up Insane Face DJ Set Gryphon Nightclub
    Commented on this photo:

    NO girls. That is NOT his tail.

  17. Miley Cyrus Buttcheeks Bangerz Shirt Instagram
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I wouldn’t mind taking my tongue for a few laps around her poop loop.

  18. John Malkovich Wearing Pajamas Talking To Child
    bdog821
    Commented on this photo:

    Somebody lost a bet!!!!!!!!!

  19. Justin Timberlake Looking Terrified Of Guy In Military Uniform
    Voice of Reisling
    Commented on this photo:

    “Don’t ask.”

    “Don’t tell.”

  20. Lena Dunham Carrying Food And Drinks
    Voice of Reisling
    Commented on this photo:

    “Where have you been! I’ve been waiting 2 hours!”

    “I got a little warm. I had to unbutton my sweater.”

  21. Candice Swanepoel MIdriff Crop Top
    Voice of Reisling
    Commented on this photo:

    Find the hermaphrodite.

  22. Sarah Jessica Parker Swimsuit
    Just_As_it_IS
    Commented on this photo:

    Her reenactment of that scene in The Emperor’s New Groove is stunning

  23. Milla Jovovich Nipples See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    I usually advocate the exact opposite but please a boob job wouldn’t be totally out of place here.

  24. Terrence Howard Skullcap Indiana Jones Hat Yellow Sneakers
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know why, but I’m actually kind of okay with that outfit.

  25. Farrah Abraham Cleavage Implants In Touch 6th Annual Idols & Icons Event
    beetlerace
    Commented on this photo:

    Shangela/Al Pacino mashup.

  26. Miley Cyrus Buttcheeks Bangerz Shirt Instagram
    KK
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that a nipple on her back butt cheek?

  27. Lady Gaga Breast Being Groped By Female Fan Outside Terry Richardson Studio
    Commented on this photo:

    Peewee Herman got implants?

  28. Milla Jovovich Nipples See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    The nipples that keep on giving and never stop. Ever.

  29. Bradley Cooper Groping Suki Waterhouse In Park
    Vladimir
    Commented on this photo:

    Working his way to the “silver linings”…

  30. Mischa Barton Fat Legs
    Commented on this photo:

    I can hear the cumulonimbus rumbling under that dress from here.

  31. Gwyneth Paltrow Nipples Sideboob No Bra Sundress
    Vladimir
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice Goops.

  32. Lena Dunham Carrying Food And Drinks
    Commented on this photo:

    Nacho cheese, salsa and guacamole. Not shown is the IV port she’ll plug them into.

  33. Carla Howe Melissa Howe Bikini Hugh Hefner Playboy Mansion
    Vladimir
    Commented on this photo:

    Makes me miss the classiness of Bob Guccione.

  34. Kate Moss Nipple Slip
    Commented on this photo:

    Incapable of being photographed without a nipple visible.

  35. Foxy Brown Cleavage Spandex Dress Long Blonde Extensions VMAs
    Commented on this photo:

    Boxy Frown.

  36. Lil Kim Huge Butt Mesh Leather Unitard VMAs
    Commented on this photo:

    That fabric was opaque before she stretched it to its very limit.

  37. JoJo Levesque Saggy Cleavage VIBE 20th Anniversary Celebration
    Schweddy Snatch
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty girl. Too bad she could only afford to get her right tit done.

  38. Gerard Depardieu Estaimpuis Belgium Honorary Citizenship Ceremony
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy Christ, there’s a Belgian George Hamilton!

  39. Lady Gaga Breast Being Groped By Female Fan Outside Terry Richardson Studio
    Commented on this photo:

    How edgy.

    Then again, this is Gaga in the vicinity of Richardson …

  40. Lena Dunham Carrying Food And Drinks
    Commented on this photo:

    ALL FOR HOMER

  41. Farrah Abraham Cleavage Implants In Touch 6th Annual Idols & Icons Event
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like a Dali painting of Jamie Farr.

  42. Iggy Azalea Butt See Through Dress VMAs
    Commented on this photo:

    Yawn. Next.

  43. Bradley Cooper Groping Suki Waterhouse In Park
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this like one of those ‘when you see it’ things, where we all realise that’s actually his own leg he’s grabbing?

  44. Lena Dunham Carrying Food And Drinks
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    ”This could very easily be taken out of context and I think it’s funny now, but I remember looking in the mirror as a kid and it would be like for an hour at a time and I’d be like, ‘I’m just so beautiful. Everybody is so lucky that they get to look at me,”’ she told the October edition of UK Marie Claire magazine.

    I think this needed to be posted under my handle, any other just wouldn’t have been appropriate.

  45. Richard Dean Anderson Fat Jowls Fan Expo Canada
    AnnaD.
    Commented on this photo:

    His current state makes me sad.

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