The Crap We Missed – Monday 8.25.14

August 25th, 2014 // 3 Comments

[Ed. Note: So it's 7:15 PM EST, and our server just now started working. Or at least enough for me to type this and then presumably crap out, so my apologies for the ensuing shooting spree if that happens. Anyway, I'll shut up now and gun up this post Photo Boy finished hours ago before we disappear into the ether again. There are other worlds than this... - SW]

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed which, judging by our server performance, you’ll probably never see. So, if you’re somehow reading this Obama’s Secret Muslim Socialist Society meetings are every Tuesday at 9PM at your local vegan cafe, bring donuts!, please enjoy all of the nipples, butts, and Simon Cowell walking by an old dude’s naked scrotum I managed to jam onto our site before it shit itself and died.

What do you mean why don’t we use all this tit money to get our shit fixed? Psh, you guys and your valid solutions to problems,

- Photo Boy

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Michelle Hunziker Butt Bikini Tomaso Trussardi
    MFer
    Commented on this photo:

    Rough day on the ol’ Superficial.

    • It’s a damn weak finish, I’ll grant you, but the site’s been up and down like a whore’s drawers today, and we got an Edit feature for the comments. All things considered, I’ll take it.

  2. Simon Cowell Lauren Silverman Nude Beach
    Odbarc
    Commented on this photo:

    Random nobody’s genitals! He’s going to sue for 10 million dollars now!

  3. Lena Dunham Blonde Hair Variety And Women In Film Emmy Nominee Celebration
    Commented on this photo:

    You’re a fucking multi-millionaire, hire a designer!

    • Ripley's Believe It Or Not

      She did hire a designer, more than one in fact. She just can’t seem to stop eating them, at least not before they’re done with their enormous task (so to speak).

  4. Enter Shikari Mouth Blown Open By Wind Leeds Festival
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Who photoshopped out the fist? And the flying chicklets and spittle?

  5. Coco Nipples See Through Shirt Instagram
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice car…too bad some beast crapped on it.

  6. Mickey Rourke Wig Insane Hairline
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Okay, if I blow my snot this way, maybe they won’t notice.

  7. Sarah Jessica Parker Nordstrom Fall Collection Launch
    Commented on this photo:

    “Who the fuck carries a salt cube?”

  8. Simon Cowell Lauren Silverman Nude Beach
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Jennifer Nicole Lee’s swimsuit finally fell all the way off.

  9. Sofia Vergara Cleavage Boob Window Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    On Southwest, two bags fly free.

  10. Kylie Jenner Sports Bra Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    #selfie #armenianwhore

  11. Simon Cowell Lauren Silverman Nude Beach
    Commented on this photo:

    I see two complete asses.

  12. Lena Dunham Blonde Hair Variety And Women In Film Emmy Nominee Celebration
    Commented on this photo:

    They finally brought back Purplesaurus Rex! Oh yeah!!!

  13. Coco Nipples See Through Shirt Instagram
    cletus
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice headlights.

  14. Enter Shikari Mouth Blown Open By Wind Leeds Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Somewhere Miley Cyrus is trying to figure out how to do this.

  15. Madonna Dude Helping Her Stretch Groin On Yacht
    Commented on this photo:

    Madonna anywhere.

  16. Taryn Manning Cleavage Entertainment Weekly Pre Emmy Party
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t remember those.

  17. Sarah Jessica Parker Nordstrom Fall Collection Launch
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Are you fuckin’ stupid? This ain’t a horseshoe!

  18. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Bra Hanging Out Buttons Undone On Dress Holding Norths Hand
    Commented on this photo:

    I live in North San Diego County and all weekend I thought they were practicing bombing on Camp Pendleton. But I guess it was just Kim Kardashian walking around La Jolla.

  19. Enter Shikari Mouth Blown Open By Wind Leeds Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Performing where? In a wind tunnel?

  20. Rumer Willis Nipples Midriff Tank Top
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey Rumer, why the long….hey! WTF!

  21. Britney Spears Nipples No Bra Saggy Boobs Legs Short Shorts Derpface
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    You have to admire her level of concentration when trying to walk and hold things in both hands all at once.

  22. Paramore Lead Singer Butt Tight Jeans Leeds Festival
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Never heard of him

  23. Serena Williams Huge Butt Yoga Pants Arthur Ashe Kids Day
    Sloppy Redneck
    Commented on this photo:

    I would eat a chili dog out of her butt

  24. Coco Nipples See Through Shirt Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    her man-jaw got photoshopped HARD.

  25. Madonna Dude Helping Her Stretch Groin On Yacht
    Commented on this photo:

    “Deeper and Deeper”? “Into the Groove”?

  26. Madonna Dude Helping Her Stretch Groin On Yacht
    JohnnyP!
    Commented on this photo:

    And this, boys, is how you pry open a cold grilled cheese sandwich.

  27. Lena Dunham Blonde Hair Variety And Women In Film Emmy Nominee Celebration
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Hmm, why does the Cheshire Cat come to mind?

  28. Sarah Jessica Parker Nordstrom Fall Collection Launch
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll get you, and your little dog toooooo

  29. Paramore Lead Singer Butt Tight Jeans Leeds Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    ah, a more annoying singer you’ll be hard pressed to find.

  30. Natasha Henstridge Cleavage Spandex Dress Entertainment Weekly Pre Emmy Party
    Commented on this photo:

    yes please.

  31. Simon Cowell Lauren Silverman Nude Beach
    Commented on this photo:

    *barf*

  32. Serena Williams Huge Butt Yoga Pants Arthur Ashe Kids Day
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m man enough to climb that mountain!

  33. Madonna Dude Helping Her Stretch Groin On Yacht
    cletus
    Commented on this photo:

    The fifth angel sounded his trumpet. …and when he opened the Abyss, smoke rose from it like the smoke from a gigantic furnace.

    The sun and sky were darkened by the smoke from the Abyss. And out of the smoke locusts came down upon the earth and were given power like that of scorpions of the earth.

  34. Mickey Rourke Wig Insane Hairline
    Commented on this photo:

    “those hot chicks know sexy man with sexy hair when they see it!”

  35. Cole Frate Famke Janssen Riding Tandem Bicycle
    Billy McFinklesteen
    Commented on this photo:

    Xenia Ondaback

  36. Kylie Jenner Sports Bra Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    #thirsty #lookatmenotmysisters #willhavesex4attention

  37. Madonna Dude Helping Her Stretch Groin On Yacht
    Commented on this photo:

    “nope. still gay.”

  38. Lena Dunham Blonde Hair Variety And Women In Film Emmy Nominee Celebration
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor thing just doesn’t know what to do with her hands when she’s not holding a couple of sloppy joe’s.

  39. Enter Shikari Mouth Blown Open By Wind Leeds Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Richie Cunningham having a seizure

  40. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Bra Hanging Out Buttons Undone On Dress Holding Norths Hand
    Commented on this photo:

    yeah, I remember when I was a young lad. Mom would take me to get icecream, and we’d walk hand in hand…laughing at how wonderful and new the world was, and mom would let her tits hang out.

  41. Angela Bassett Cleavage 66th Emmy Award Performers Nominee Reception
    Commented on this photo:

    I respect Angela Bassett as much as anyone who saw Strange Days and nothing else that she’s done, but come on…if your tits look like that, wear a high neckline.

  42. Madonna Dude Helping Her Stretch Groin On Yacht
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Madonna travels with her own chiropractor and not one but two gay best friends.

  43. Rumer Willis Nipples Midriff Tank Top
    Commented on this photo:

    That aint her! What the hell did they do with her forehead and chin?

  44. Lena Dunham Blonde Hair Variety And Women In Film Emmy Nominee Celebration
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s daring us…just looking us in the face and daring us to say she’s ugly. Well, challenge accepted. Lena, you’re an aggressively unattractive woman.

  45. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Bra Hanging Out Buttons Undone On Dress Holding Norths Hand
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    If there was ever a bra in there it has been soundly defeated.

  46. Simon Cowell Lauren Silverman Nude Beach
    Commented on this photo:

    That dude’s scrote is among the least offensive things in this picture.

  47. Lena Dunham Blonde Hair Variety And Women In Film Emmy Nominee Celebration
    rican
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s Madame Blueberry!

  48. Mickey Rourke Wig Insane Hairline
    Commented on this photo:

    Thats pretty much everyone’s reaction to a toupee

  49. Crystal Hefner Cleavage Nipple No Bra Tank Top Instagram
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    What has she done with the remains? It’s not right that the man never had a proper send off. Where is Hugh?

  50. Serena Williams Huge Butt Yoga Pants Arthur Ashe Kids Day
    Commented on this photo:

    How many kids did Arthur Ashe have?? Or have I misunderstood the nature of the event?

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