“Even Shia LaBeouf didn’t shit on our craft like this.” – Banksy
Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed, your weekend’s bounty of celebrity tomfoolery not worthy of Fish’s words. I’m not going to lie, today there’s a whole bunch of butt shots in here, for the candid behind is my prey, upon which I silently stalk from the wilderness of this couch cushion fort I make my mother call ‘The Office.’ (She cries herself to sleep most nights.) Anyway, amidst the ass parade, we’ve also got Dominic Cooper who is probably chewing through duct tape in the back of a windowless van right now, DMX who is probably going to jail again very soon, January Jones in that fat suit on Mad Men was Kristy Swanson this whole time, and finally, I guess Lady Gaga has noticed the press ignoring her lately so they got treated to a lens full of almost bare cheeks today.
I told you, straight-up booty bonanza,
- Photo Boy
Click Here to Start The Gallery
Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
We’re going to need a bigger boat.
Or lake.
Or bag of pork rinds.
That kid probably got shot.
Nice ass. Who cares who it’s attached to.
Just don’t turn around.
No difference between her ass and her face. Cheeks are oversized and nothing but shit comes out of there.
Those oversized cheeks are a hell of a lot sexier than the boney boy asses you have in your spank bank.
Don’t know what either one of you are talking about. It looks flat as a sheet of paper to me.
The carpet doesn’t match the drapes.
Uhmmm there is not carpet… It’s been barren for many years…
I’ve heard of trimming the hedges, but she done scorched the earth.
God, she’s blacker than Janet Jackson. Is she one of the O’ De Doo Da Days?
Funny, doesn’t look like a buffet table to me.
“Awwwwhhh I told you she blew a handle thinking it was the VIP section’s security!!!”
That’s fuckin’ right buddy, just like I said, the Higgs fucking Boson!
Whoa, I thought celebs only wore their hair like that for mug-shots.
Is he starring in the George Michael biopic?
It’s called ” A Stroll In The Park”.
R.I.P Ernest Borgnine, 1917-2012.
Her spanx are showing.
Legs like that don’t need spanx.
Her legs may not but her thighs and love handles may.
Nah. Too easy.
Dominic… uhmmm … behind you, dude…
She’s wearing clogs, fo sho.
How nice of that guy to wipe his chin after he finishes.
Yes yes yes. I’d eat through those pantyhose to nibble on that ass. And I have a fabric in the mouth phobia but for her, I’d do it.
this makes me proud!
Omg her bags and the rippling. UGH….my eyes.
“Guys, I know there’s been some malicious rumors going around… And I just want to clear things up: Snookie’s baby is not mine…”
His fan-base is balding?
Look at that greasy face. George Lopez demands a paternity test.
“I twa I twa a paparazzi…”
Wake me up before you go-go
Don’t leave me hanging on like a yo-yo!
Wake me up before you go go,
I don’t want to miss it when you hit that high
“Yo Yo YO!”
“Everybody having a good TIME?”
“I can’t HEAR you!”
Press Play
And I’ve just “been a DJ”
Thank you.
Ooh, that looks fun, let me try:
“Check, check”
“Kickin’ it on the 1′s and 2′s”
“Single ladies, put yo hands up!”
“Somebody ..anybody ..SCREEEEAM!!!”
Now where’s my $10,000?
I always wondered what happened to the dude from EMF
A hug after a $20 blowjob? That’s odd.
I don’t like her but….she’s got ‘the diamond’.
Reasoning that he hasn’t had a good cavity search in a while, Val Kilmer decided to send out an open invitation…
The cabbie looks uncomfortable.
Hahaha! There’s no creamy center here… just bones.
The irony.
nice.
Chick on the left want the dick…
Good eye. I was about to say the same thing.
“D! D, you fool! Do I LOOK like a bicycle?”
That’s the closest she’s come to cream in a while…
Wow, Andrew Ridgely really went to hell while George Michael looks fresh as can be. Must be all the dick.
“My buddy just IMDB’ed, and she WAS in the Big Lebowski. You BOTH owe me $100! HA!”
Why would he call someone else to IMDB when he’s on a smartphone?
a) He’s not too bright.
b) He’s on as many or more substances than Tara.
c) Shut up, it was funny.
Sid & Nancy Redux.
Couldn’t fit her in there anymore huh?
is that vomit??
I think it is actually…charming.
Mom-Jean butt looks so hot on a 21-year-old. You rock’em gurl!
Brazil called, they sent this one back…
No, no, dude, it was Spain OVER Italy 4-0
perfect couple
I heard he just introduces himself as “Val Kill-me” with a sigh nowadays.
Pauly “Don’t ever look like me!”
Pauly “Dipshit”
Pauly “Douchbag”
Pauly “Dumbass”
Everybody join in
I always just assumed the D was for Diarrhea
D is for ‘Derp’.
This is also the title to his upcoming autobiography.
“D” is for Downy
Dicklick, Dicksmack, Dickfuck, Dickface…
That smile says, “I’m about to eat fifteen pork chops.”
Your move, Paula.
I’d have grabbed her ass. How could you not?
Gayness? And perhaps lots of security.