The Crap We Missed – Monday 7.30.12

July 30th, 2012 // 725 Comments

Welcome to another massive Monday The Crap We Missed that I’m just gonna jump right into with Michelle Obama, who’s apparently an awkwardly long hugger, Derek Hough butching it up for charity, Jeff Goldblum being just as surprised as all of us that those stupid hats may actually have something to do with jazz performance, Kellan Lutz thinking ‘Nope, still does nothing for me,’ and finally, it may seem like Brooke Mueller is shithoused drunk, but she’s probably just really, really high. On crack.

Later that evening, Nicole Kidman would confirm that her conditioner bottle was indeed empty, and Keith Urban would never comfortably ride a bicycle again,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Donnie Wahlberg Hat Dancing Blue Bloods Set
    Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    You’re over 40. You can’t pull that look off anymore. There’s a formula for that. Google it.

  2. Morgan Freeman One Glove
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    If Michael Jackson had lived.

  3. Catherine Bach Swimsuit
    Commented on this photo:

    Looking good, Boss Hogg!

  4. Nicole Kidman Frozen Face Keith Urban
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Did anyone ever inform Nicole that the filming of The Stepford Wives ended quite a while ago?

  5. Michelle Obama Hugging LeBron James
    Commented on this photo:

    Obama turns to his national security adviser and says “put him on the list.”

  6. Carnie Wilson Cleavage Head Wrap
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    You’d cry too if Carnie Wilson walked past you in a dress that is backless down to the knees.

  7. Catherine Bach Swimsuit
    Commented on this photo:

    Suddenly, 1979 seems like a long time ago.

  8. Pamela Anderson
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. WTF, man?

  9. Arnold Schwarzenegger Biking Spandex Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    They programmed him to ride a bike? Fuck, she’s never going to get away.

  10. Dr. Robert Rey V Neck Leather Jacket
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    This guy is so fucking weird. What woman would go near him let alone do surgery on her? I don’t even have words to describe what a fucked up human this guy is.

  11. Arnold Schwarzenegger Biking Spandex Shorts
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like he’s taken one too many dips in the plastic surgery well.

  12. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Fat Legs Tight Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Orange is a very slimming color, if you’re a traffic cone.

  13. Hilary Duff Legs Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    She has the shoes of an elf but the body of an orc.

  14. Catherine Bach Swimsuit
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    I hope the General Lee is a flatbed truck now . . .

  15. Hilary Duff Legs Short Shorts
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone please help this woman dress. Every time she goes out in public, she’s a train wreck.

  16. Dr. Robert Rey V Neck Leather Jacket
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone is up for the Jeff Goldblum part in the Jurassic Park reboot.

  17. Bret Michaels Shaved Armpits Bandana
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘The 30th Annual Quick Chek New Jersey Festival of Ballooning”, eh?
    **snicker!***
    Uh, next stop the ‘Mothers of the Revolution ” Gerogia Peach Pie
    Bake-Off?
    Rock On, Bret!

  18. Dr. Robert Rey V Neck Leather Jacket
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s so pretty!

  19. Jay Leno
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Jay’s been wearing that same fucking shirt for so long the buttons are starting to pop off.

  20. Haley Joel Osment Sunglasses Fat Face
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    Not pictured: a cane and a tin cup

  21. Molly Sims Bra Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    She just had a baby about a month ago.

  22. Michelle Obama Hugging LeBron James
    realist
    Commented on this photo:

    what’s with HUGGING? It ain’t fashionable unless it is your mom.

  23. Nicole Kidman Frozen Face Keith Urban
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    His head just keeps growing bigger and bigger under Nicole’s steady, intense gaze..

  24. Michelle Obama Hugging LeBron James
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that a drone coming?

  25. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Fat Legs Tight Pants
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    No Comment.

  26. Maggie Gyllenhaal Daughter Ramona
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s always looked like a mom with kids. Always.

  27. Michelle Obama Hugging LeBron James
    realist
    Commented on this photo:

    n.i.g.g.a.s. of the same negative energy reject each other like two negatives of a magnet.

  28. Donnie Wahlberg Hat Dancing Blue Bloods Set
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    oh yeah…donnie. I forgot.

  29. Catherine Bach Swimsuit
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Man, it’s really not even fair to post that pic. Just let us have our memories.

  30. Dr. Robert Rey V Neck Leather Jacket
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    No, I did NOT steal Adam Lambert’s luggage!

  31. Mitt Romney American Flag Ann Romney
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, what an agenda he’s got! A bunch of political gaffes in London, a quick trip to Israel to promise them anything they want – should he get elected – and back in time to catch an Olympic event and do some photo-ops holding an American flag.
    Go Mitt! Can’t wait to see how many fuck-ups he does in August…

  32. Mitt Romney American Flag Ann Romney
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    A very patriotic way to hide an erection.

  33. Hilary Duff Legs Short Shorts
    realist
    Commented on this photo:

    (HUGE) … Chucky (cottage) Cheese thighs.

  34. Jay Leno
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    I have 7,000 cars but I take a limo.

  35. Mischa Barton Swimsuit Sebastian Knapp
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, if I was dating her I’d hide my face from the cameras too…

  36. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Fat Legs Tight Pants
    lily
    Commented on this photo:

    MOOOOOOOO size 4 MY ASS. Hips dont lie.

  37. The Situation Sideways Hat
    icu
    Commented on this photo:

    Cheer up man, you don’t look a day over dead!

  38. Jeff Goldblum Playing Piano
    Commented on this photo:

    You know some asshole in the crowd just shouted: “Play some Skynyrd, man!”

  39. Haley Joel Osment Sunglasses Fat Face
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Those are actually specially made extra-wide-set sunglasses.
    And yet, his giant pasty noggin’ just eats ‘em up!

  40. Morgan Freeman One Glove
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    If Santa Claus was a Black cyborg pimp.

  41. Tyra Banks
    lily
    Commented on this photo:

    Yea yea she’s got spanx on, but they ALL use them…even the hott ones like Jessica Alba. Tyra looks damn good…not Sports Illustrated material like in her prime, but she’s no spring chicken!

  42. Arnold Schwarzenegger Biking Spandex Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    “Get to the choppa!!!”

  43. The Situation Sideways Hat
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    I must repeat: Are vehicles getting bigger, or are untalented fame-whores getting smaller?

  44. Mitt Romney American Flag Ann Romney
    Commented on this photo:

    Rock on Wayne!

  45. Pamela Anderson
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    As a thumbnail I cannot tell the difference between her and Britney.

  46. Sharni Vinson Bikini Life Vest Kellan Lutz Shirtless
    lily
    Commented on this photo:

    Haha he does have a small head! Nice body though

  47. Hilary Duff Legs Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s looking damn good to me these days.

  48. Michelle Obama Hugging LeBron James
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s one of the most awkward ‘hugs I”ve ever seen.

  49. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Fat Legs Tight Pants
    Mickey01232000
    Commented on this photo:

    So Kim Kardashian walks in a bar with a duck under her arm. The bartender says where did you find that pig. Kim says pig? It’s a duck. The bartender says I was talking to the duck.

  50. Arnold Schwarzenegger Biking Spandex Shorts
    Low Ball
    Commented on this photo:

    Ever suspicious of kitchen counters with maids on them hiding in the bushes ready to rape him.

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