The Crap We Missed – Monday 7.30.12

July 30th, 2012 // 725 Comments

Welcome to another massive Monday The Crap We Missed that I’m just gonna jump right into with Michelle Obama, who’s apparently an awkwardly long hugger, Derek Hough butching it up for charity, Jeff Goldblum being just as surprised as all of us that those stupid hats may actually have something to do with jazz performance, Kellan Lutz thinking ‘Nope, still does nothing for me,’ and finally, it may seem like Brooke Mueller is shithoused drunk, but she’s probably just really, really high. On crack.

Later that evening, Nicole Kidman would confirm that her conditioner bottle was indeed empty, and Keith Urban would never comfortably ride a bicycle again,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Catherine Bach Swimsuit
    tidbit
    Commented on this photo:

    Redefining fashion yet again with Daisy Pukes.

    • Johnny P!

      ‘Daisy Pukes’… do we have a new name for the ones who shouldn’t wear them now? If so, I’m in!

  2. Derek Hough Perv Stache
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    A poor mans Brad Pitt.

  3. Christian Audigier Nathalie Sorensen Jetski
    diego
    Commented on this photo:

    No, I swear, that’s the ass douche that created Ed Hardy, not me!

  4. Dr. Robert Rey V Neck Leather Jacket
    USDA Prime McBeef, MD
    Commented on this photo:

    Alright, come on now… Who has the more believable MD?

  5. Arnold Schwarzenegger Biking Spandex Shorts
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    is that the bike seat or is he popping a chubby?

  6. Maggie Gyllenhaal Daughter Ramona
    Kathleen Turner
    Commented on this photo:

    4 months after the baby and she still looks like this? This chick is really letting herself go.

  7. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Fat Legs Tight Pants
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Gotta love a fat girl in corduroy

  8. The Situation Sideways Hat
    I'mCool
    Commented on this photo:

    When trying too hard meets not trying hard enough, it rips a hole in the douche-time continuum.

  9. Dr. Robert Rey V Neck Leather Jacket
    Basement Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    This douche makes The Situation look like Mitt Rommey

  10. Hilary Duff Legs Short Shorts
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    those thighs could suffocate me

  11. Dr. Robert Rey V Neck Leather Jacket
    Alice Pooper
    Commented on this photo:

    can’t believe this guy’s a het. i doubt the gays want him either. where does this uber douche go?

  12. Dr. Robert Rey V Neck Leather Jacket
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    dr. doosh dooshenstein

  13. Sharni Vinson Bikini Life Vest Kellan Lutz Shirtless
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Roid woody dressing right

  14. Jeff Goldblum Playing Piano
    Commented on this photo:

    OH CRAP! All my presets reset to default!

  15. Kym Marsh Bikini
    Basement Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    Where’s Bret Michaels? It’s a Rock of Love Skanks, Bitches and Ho’s pool party

  16. Jeff Goldblum Playing Piano
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    not pictured here – guy under keyboard

  17. Carnie Wilson Cleavage Head Wrap
    Brian Wilson
    Commented on this photo:

    Stealing food from toddlers AGAIN, shame on you!

  18. Arnold Schwarzenegger Biking Spandex Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    “I spy with my little eye something beginning with … Maid”

  19. Jay Leno
    Commented on this photo:

    You ever notice you never see him and Rosie O’Donnell in the same photo?

  20. Michelle Obama Hugging LeBron James
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Must not look down her sweater.

  21. Jay Leno
    Basement Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    For the last time, I don’t steal other comedians’ jokes!

  22. Jeff Goldblum Playing Piano
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, what a time for the drugs to wear off.

  23. Kelly Brook Butt Floral Pants
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    stupendous turd cutter

  24. Morgan Freeman One Glove
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    i see he’s sporting his robot hand

  25. Jay Leno
    Commented on this photo:

    Barnie Frank never changes.

  26. Pamela Anderson
    Alice Pooper
    Commented on this photo:

    zombie sees meat!

  27. Kelly Brook Butt Floral Pants
    Basement Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    She has got to be the most fashion-challenged celeb on the planet. She should stick to what she’s good for: nudes.

  28. Mitt Romney American Flag Ann Romney
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    “Willard, dear, that isn’t a poor person down there, is it?”
    “Someday we’ll get them all, dear. Someday we’ll get them all.”

  29. Rebecca Romijn Lingerie Jesse Tyler Ferguson The Producers
    Alice Pooper
    Commented on this photo:

    come all yee penises, the gate is open!

  30. Pamela Anderson
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    holy fucking swamp donkey

  31. Nicole Kidman Frozen Face Keith Urban
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh shit, she’s gone into targeting mode. Someone hit the override before she kills him!

  32. Bret Michaels Shaved Armpits Bandana
    Commented on this photo:

    You know your career is in the shitter when you’re performing at a ballooning festival.

  33. Rebecca Romijn Lingerie Jesse Tyler Ferguson The Producers
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    jizz in my pants

  34. Cheryl Burke Bikini Kelly Monaco Bikini
    Basement Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    Who? And Who?

  35. Brooke Mueller Drunk Falling Down Jason Lowenstein
    Basement Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    I faw down go boom

  36. Donnie Wahlberg Hat Dancing Blue Bloods Set
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    sadly he’s the cooler brother

  37. Donnie Wahlberg Hat Dancing Blue Bloods Set
    Alice Pooper
    Commented on this photo:

    dude can sure attract the fatties

  38. Pamela Anderson
    Basement Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    Hep C is a bitch

  39. Mischa Barton Swimsuit Sebastian Knapp
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s just confessed to him that she cheated on him with one of her drug-induced hallucinations.

  40. Catherine Bach Swimsuit
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    All you smoking hot bitches just getting outta high school, this is your future !

  41. Morgan Freeman One Glove
    Dave
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait, I thought it was Samuel L. Jackson who got his arm cut off in Revenge of the Sith…

  42. The Situation Sideways Hat
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this an impromptu tribute to that dead Beastie Boy?

  43. Dr. Robert Rey V Neck Leather Jacket
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    So they give MD’s in douchebag now?

  44. Sharni Vinson Bikini Life Vest Kellan Lutz Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    That guy’s head is way too small.

  45. Arnold Schwarzenegger Biking Spandex Shorts
    sofa king
    Commented on this photo:

    is it just me or would the “jaws” theme music go well with this picture?

  46. Jeff Goldblum Playing Piano
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Unfortunately they let him on stage before anyone realized it wasn’t Elvis Costello.

  47. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Fat Legs Tight Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Which one is Kim?

  48. Rebecca Romijn Lingerie Jesse Tyler Ferguson The Producers
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s going on in this picture can be best described as something that rhymes with edge jack you lay shun.

  49. Jay Leno
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    In all fairness, I would probably get a little pissed to if everywhere I went people screamed “You suck! Conan was better!” It’s got to be especially painful in bed when his own wife says it.

  50. Haley Joel Osment Sunglasses Fat Face
    Commented on this photo:

    I see dead careers.

Leave A Comment