The Crap We Missed – Monday 7.25.11

July 25th, 2011 // 864 Comments

I’ll have what she’s having unless it involves Pilates. *checks caption* Sonofabitch!

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed so full of celebrity random, I’m not even going to try to start calling shit out. All you need to know is Val Kilmer and Kirsten Dunst are slowly morphing into the same person, and Phoebe Price learned a valuable lesson about bringing a younger, hotter sidekick to dress up like Slave Leia at Comic-Con because we will crop your eight million freckled ass right out. Which we did.

Skinny Jonah Hill should not exist,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. David Hasselhoff
    Commented on this photo:

    He just saw the open bar.

  2. Olivia Munn Cleavage
    Derp
    Commented on this photo:

    Still gross as shit.

  3. Val Kilmer
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    Sammy Hagar got a flat iron?

  4. Courtney Love
    Commented on this photo:

    By “performing” I guess you mean her act where she stands upright for 30 seconds with no assistance?

  5. Aubrey O'Day Kim Lee Katrina Chubarova Cleavage
    Oh my
    Commented on this photo:

    In this picture: 3 girls The Superficial readers will claim are disgusting, but wouldn’t hesitate for a second to let suck their dick. We all love whores around here, let’s stop the denial.

  6. Alessandra Ambrosio Sex Face Pilates Orgasm
    Axa
    Commented on this photo:

    Over rated.

    • Jill_Ess

      Agreed. It would be much hotter if she was wearing make up. She looks like she just woke up and when I look at this photo I think ‘bad breath.’ I’m so thankful I am not a celebrity.

      • PoorMaryKelly

        Sure. Being given jewelery and designer clothing is a real downer. Being able to dominate everyone around you and having them agree with every word you say sucks. And screwing male models? Fuck that! It’s for losers!

    • eatme

      bukakke time :)

  7. Val Kilmer
    King
    Commented on this photo:

    That was my SKULL. I’m sooo wasted.

  8. Kirsten Dunst Double Chin
    Axa
    Commented on this photo:

    The fuck!??

  9. Olivia Munn Cleavage
    Axa
    Commented on this photo:

    Over-rated

  10. Ozzy Osbourne Sharon Osbourne
    Commented on this photo:

    Every time he sees a hairy beast he tries to bite the head off.

  11. David Beckham Crotch Grab
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    Yep, still there…and still fabulous!

  12. Kirsten Dunst Double Chin
    Becky
    Commented on this photo:

    Grandpa?

  13. Artofwar

    ….I must admit and digress–that is the best taking-it-up-the-ass-face that I have seen in quite sometime….Artofwar

  14. David Beckham Crotch Grab
    your mom
    Commented on this photo:

    Did he spend a night in Paris recently?

  15. Angelina Jolie
    Jenna
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweety don’t pull so hard or mommy’s arm will fall off.

  16. David Duchovny
    Axa
    Commented on this photo:

    David leaving after nailing 20 women in 10 minutes…

  17. Jonah Hill Skinny
    guy rossi
    Commented on this photo:

    “Thank you Chazz Bono!”

  18. David Duchovny
    i want to believe
    Commented on this photo:

    OH No, the grays got Mulder!

  19. David Duchovny
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he shrinking? Looks like he’s using painter’s tape to hold his shoes on.

    • PoorMaryKelly

      Jeebus! He must be suicidal. His shoestrings are missing and, you’re right, they’re replaced with tape? How sad.

  20. Angelina Jolie
    Axa
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder when the last picture of her eating food was taken…

    This broad is all kinds of fucked up

  21. Kirsten Dunst Double Chin
    Jill_Ess
    Commented on this photo:

    oh my good Lord. Again, I’m so thankful I am not a celebrity.

  22. Kirsten Dunst Double Chin
    JesusCan'tHitACurveball
    Commented on this photo:

    Philip Seymour Hoffman checks a text while on the set of his new Fabio biopic.

  23. David Beckham Crotch Grab
    King
    Commented on this photo:

    Bollocks! Got anuva skibble wibble on me scrubblie dublie.
    God save va queen!

  24. Harrison Ford Calista Flockhart
    Commented on this photo:

    One guess as to which one was the alien.

  25. Jessica Biel Moustache
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty lame when girls start changing their appearance to lure back their lost loves.

  26. January Jones Pregnant
    Becky
    Commented on this photo:

    Kirsten is looking good lately

  27. Jessica Biel Moustache
    Axa
    Commented on this photo:

    Biel with a moustache looks better than Ambrosio with hers

  28. Kirsten Dunst Double Chin
    Norm
    Commented on this photo:

    Bahahahahahahaha!! And people find her attractive!

  29. Jonah Hill Skinny
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    *secret* – Right now, I’m actually three times as high as that guy in the background…

  30. Val Kilmer
    Commented on this photo:

    “Val! Val! Do that bite thing from Top Gun!”

  31. David Duchovny
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    Wet spots on his shirt. Wet spots on the ground. Paperbacks in hand.
    I hope he didn’t just come from an E-Reading.

  32. Ryan Kwanten
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    This has to have something to do with bukkake. Just has to.

  33. Aubrey O'Day Kim Lee Katrina Chubarova Cleavage
    Jill_Ess
    Commented on this photo:

    What fun this party would be! Though I’m confused about why there is a “Hangover II’ party now. Is the celebrating the DVD release? If so, that would explain the D List attendees.

  34. Olivia Munn Cleavage
    JesusCan'tHitACurveball
    Commented on this photo:

    Normally the things I want to eat are on top of a gingham table cloth, not below it.

  35. Paula LaBaredas Slave Leia Cosplay
    Axa
    Commented on this photo:

    It was the frumpy footwear that always ruined the costume for me.
    Why not sexy gladiator sandles that went all the way up? Why even shoes at all? Don’t most slaves not own any shoes… even in this universe?

    Why did Lucas dump her into a pair of socks he’d already beaten off into

    • I am man that grew up in the 70′s and 80′s and based a good potion of my life on these films and can say honestly that I’ve never even noticed there were shoes with this outfit until now.

      • no shit, WTF axa? were there shoes in the movie? There’s been 30+ years of Slavegirl Leia cosplay going on now and not once have I ever noticed the shoes.

        Do you know how I know you’re gay?

  36. Paula LaBaredas Slave Leia Cosplay
    Axa
    Commented on this photo:

    vey, those socks….

  37. Kirsten Dunst Double Chin
    ChickenHawk
    Commented on this photo:

    Kirsten Dunst portraying Sally Struthers in “Jabba the Hut’s Revenge”

  38. Val Kilmer
    JesusCan'tHitACurveball
    Commented on this photo:

    Kirsten Dunst doing publicity for her competing Fabio biopic.

  39. David Hasselhoff
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    He just saw Wayne Newton wearing the same jacket.
    I hope this is not the pose they’ll use for his wax figure. Come to think of it, he already looks as though he is made of wax!

  40. Alessandra Ambrosio Sex Face Pilates Orgasm
    Commented on this photo:

    whatever Pilates is supposed to be, it looks a lot like taking a standing dump through a telephoto lens.

  41. January Jones Pregnant
    Jill_Ess
    Commented on this photo:

    I think I am going to photoshop the purse out and a leash in, an make her walking the missing dog in the posting behind her. That image makes me happy.

  42. David Hasselhoff
    ChickenHawk
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this Siegfried or Roy?

  43. Alan Cumming
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Is Pee-Wee gay now?

  44. Kirsten Dunst Double Chin
    Commented on this photo:

    Hello Truman Capote.

  45. Nicolas Cage Idris Alba
    King
    Commented on this photo:

    Stringer Bell saw those shoes and is rolling over in his fictional grave.

  46. Kirsten Dunst Double Chin
    Commented on this photo:

    I hope she’s texting her financial adviser to move her movie earnings into safe investments. Her earning years are behind her.

  47. Enrique Inglesias Crotch Picture
    Commented on this photo:

    @ricky_martin

  48. Al Pacino Headband
    edamame
    Commented on this photo:

    This is what an Italian bromance looks like.

  49. Olivia Munn Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she cos-playing as Queen Titslip?

  50. David Beckham Crotch Grab
    Jill_Ess
    Commented on this photo:

    You could make a daily desk calendar of all these shots. Crotch-a-day. Do you the rights to print and sell these photos?

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