The Crap We Missed – Monday 7.2.12

July 2nd, 2012 // 593 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed, which in today’s case happens to be a generous breast-filled smattering of all things not related to that sham marriage that miraculously lasted six years before getting alien-penised in the mouth. Anyway, we’ve got Kingston Rossdale who is going to want his mom to stop walking with him WAY before middle school, Jake Gyllenhaal who still has that beard, but at least she looks happy, Jonah Hill is hilarious again, and Arnold Schwarzenegger & Sylvester Stallone have the kind of macho fun that can only be found at the valet of a Beverly Hills salon.

Remember how hot Jane Seymour was in Wedding Crashers? Yeah…

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Jake Gyllenhaal Beard Mystery Woman
    Commented on this photo:

    Tee Hee…alright I guess…but why would you want to call me “Maggie” in bed?

  2. Carly Rae Jepsen Canada Day
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    “And this is how I got my recording contract.”

  3. Jennifer Lawrence
    Commented on this photo:

    something looks different…I just can’t tell what
    [img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/02/[/img]

  4. Gwen Stefani Tight Leather Pants Midriff Kingston Rossdale
    Commented on this photo:

    The Adventures of Kingston and the Magical Aesexual Ostrich.

  5. Nicki Minaj Cleavage BET Awards
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought Blackface was no longer politically correct?

  6. Mary Carey Cleavage Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d like to see a set of photo’s spaced at 3 month intervals from the time she was 18 to now. That way we could tell the approximate time she stopped looking like a human being.

  7. Jane Seymour Wrinkles
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Unfortunately, even the hottest babes get old.

  8. Morgan More Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    I like how she feels it’s necessary to tug her waistband down a little to show us the tattoo. You know…in case her face doesn’t convey enough badass.

  9. Bruce Jenner Bad Nose Job
    Commented on this photo:

    Look, I’m only going to say this one more time…I do not have a daughter named Melissa, and I have never been married to a man named Edgar.

  10. Magic Johnson Ice Cream Cone
    IndySteel
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy sh*t, it’s Scatman Crothers!

  11. Jake Gyllenhaal Beard Mystery Woman
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey I know, lets go become Scientologists!”

  12. Morgan More Bikini
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    The song “Redneck Woman” comes to mind.

  13. Richard Grieco Sparkly Shirt Red Sunglasses
    Commented on this photo:

    If I make the 50 hairs on my head look all crazy, no one will even notice I’m almost bald!

  14. Jermaine Dupri Straw Hat Tennis Clothes Tall Date BET Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Whatchu talkin’ about, Willis?

  15. Bradley Cooper Cassius Clay Shirt
    Heathie
    Commented on this photo:

    He has surprisingly small hands.

  16. Simon Cowell
    doogleberg
    Commented on this photo:

    In every picture of a fat girl wearing shorts there’s a Simon Cowell in the background saying it all with a facial expression.

  17. Jane Seymour Wrinkles
    Taylor
    Commented on this photo:

    Dear Jane, please never purse your lips again.

  18. Carly Rae Jepsen Canada Day
    Commented on this photo:

    And that was BEFORE the guy behind her shoved that water bottle up her ass!

  19. Kelly Bensimon Swimsuit Book Release
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m guessing her book “I can make you hot” is 3 chapters:
    1. get fake boobs
    2. get fake tan
    3. profit

  20. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s the first time I’ve seen maternity pants with a stretch panel in the ass.

  21. Jermaine Dupri Straw Hat Tennis Clothes Tall Date BET Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Sure, it’s all adorable and trophy wifey until she locks you in a raccoon cage and you end up shooting yourself in the chest and crying about how much it hurts while you take an hour to bleed to death.

    I guess he isn’t that short.

  22. Sharon Stone Nipples
    Sheppy
    Commented on this photo:

    Pointy.

  23. Selena Gomez Justin Bieber Eating Popsicles
    anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow r these two still eating each other’s pussies? I thought they broke up.

  24. Nicki Minaj Cleavage BET Awards
    me
    Commented on this photo:

    this bitch is so fucking hideous. And to top it off she has a moronic voice.

  25. Jane Seymour Wrinkles
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s almost time to give Christopher Reeve his pocket watch back.

  26. Haylie Duff Cleavage Tight Minidress
    Josh
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess that it’s she, and not her sister, who’s taking it in the Duff for money these days.

  27. Kelly Bensimon Swimsuit Book Release
    Commented on this photo:

    She should read that book to her knees.

  28. Amanda Seyfried Legs Butt Booty Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    What the F! Superficial! If I want to see alot of pasty ass women in ill fitting shorts, I’ll go to Walmart.

  29. Reese Witherspoon Pregnant Belly
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s out looking for don’t bees.

  30. Nicki Minaj Cleavage BET Awards
    Dhaddo
    Commented on this photo:

    This is the face I make every time I see you too

  31. Mary Carey Cleavage Minidress
    Josh
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought this was Shauna Sand until I read the caption. She’s lost way too much weight. Tits on a stick… next!

  32. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Pants
    me
    Commented on this photo:

    Not attractive. How the fuck does she wipe her ass?!?!?!? There is no way she doesn’t leave brown streaks in her underwear.

  33. Tyrese Gibson
    Crissy
    Commented on this photo:

    “Bitch whatchusaid?”

  34. Jonah Hil Fat Pumping Gas
    Commented on this photo:

    This guy’s so lazy, he can’t even stand when he pumps gas. How about riding a bike, fatty.

  35. Sharon Stone Nipples
    Crissy
    Commented on this photo:

    Ok, Sharon we get it! You have boobs. With nipples. Ok, go away now!…

  36. Nicki Minaj Cleavage BET Awards
    Josh
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d hit that… in a Chris Brown sort of way.

  37. Arnold Schwarzenegger Sylvester Stallone
    Commented on this photo:

    Off to their bra fitting.

  38. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Like the stegosaurus the Kardashian is able to move its enormous bulk thanks to a secondary brain, twenty times the size of the one contained in its cranial cavity, located in the hip region of the spinal cord.

  39. Jane Seymour Wrinkles
    Commented on this photo:

    Dr, Quinn, Medicare Recipient.

  40. Alexis Bellino Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    More make-up please.

    • GeorgeWBush

      Ya, wish these trannys would at least make an effort to learn how to properly apply their war paint. If you’re going to try and pass off as a woman, go the extra mile. Wearing a thong, getting some implants, and knowing how to tuck your shlong is just the basics. Its the little details like shaving the moustache, faking the high pitch voice, and make-up, that takes it to the next level

  41. Kourtney Kardashian Pregnant Belly
    Mickey01232000
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like she swallowed a watermellon.

  42. Carly Rae Jepsen Canada Day
    Crissy
    Commented on this photo:

    So I’m guessing “Canada Day” makes a lot of men happy! Those Canadians are freaks, I tell you!

  43. Mary Carey Cleavage Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    For a moment there, I thought that she was holding Verne Troyer.

  44. Gwen Stefani Tight Leather Pants Midriff Kingston Rossdale
    Veronika Larsson
    Commented on this photo:

    She supervises the household staff, she eats once a week, she lives off her former musical glory–how does she manage all that and still find time to dress like a street corner hooker? She’s Super Mom!

  45. Jennifer Lawrence
    Veronika Larsson
    Commented on this photo:

    Victoria’s Secret had a sale on Wonderbras.

  46. Jermaine Dupri Straw Hat Tennis Clothes Tall Date BET Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like an extra from Chariots of Fire.

  47. Christina Milian Cleavage Bra See Through Shirt
    Veronika Larsson
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she sexually harassing herself?

    I love her hair!

  48. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Pants
    Crissy
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh Damnnnnnnn! Moooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

  49. Carly Rae Jepsen Canada Day
    Commented on this photo:

    This is the worst thing to come out of Canada since Nickelback.

  50. Sharon Stone Nipples
    Jonesy
    Commented on this photo:

    Thank you Ma’am for pointing me in the right direction, you’re such a sweet heart!!!

Leave A Comment