The Crap We Missed – Monday 7.2.12

July 2nd, 2012 // 593 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed, which in today’s case happens to be a generous breast-filled smattering of all things not related to that sham marriage that miraculously lasted six years before getting alien-penised in the mouth. Anyway, we’ve got Kingston Rossdale who is going to want his mom to stop walking with him WAY before middle school, Jake Gyllenhaal who still has that beard, but at least she looks happy, Jonah Hill is hilarious again, and Arnold Schwarzenegger & Sylvester Stallone have the kind of macho fun that can only be found at the valet of a Beverly Hills salon.

Remember how hot Jane Seymour was in Wedding Crashers? Yeah…

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Selena Gomez Justin Bieber Eating Popsicles
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    spongebob with gumball eyes conquers all.

  2. Tyrese Gibson
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    I can almost taste the “nigga, please” in this picture.

  3. Selena Gomez Justin Bieber Eating Popsicles
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s practicing the skills that will get her half his money one day. He’s practicing the skills that will get him a chipped tooth one day.

  4. Jake Gyllenhaal Beard Mystery Woman
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    I think he has cankles.

  5. Simon Cowell
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Now, now, there’s enough Simon for all fat chicks.

  6. Selena Gomez Justin Bieber Eating Popsicles
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t think she could send him signals that are any more obvious… I can literally see the plan flying over his head…

  7. Simon Cowell
    Commented on this photo:

    You’d think being Cowell’s friend would land you better looking women…

    • mismy

      The thing is, none of those girls look like “women” to me. He gets that creepy, smug pimp look when he’s near teenage girls?? Gross…

  8. Amanda Seyfried Legs Butt Booty Shorts
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone’s been hitting the thrift stores with Miley, I see.

  9. Tyrese Gibson
    Commented on this photo:

    WHO YOU CALLIN’ SEAL?!?!?!?!

  10. Mary Carey Cleavage Minidress
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    If she doesn’t stand exactly like that, her panties fall down to her ankles.

  11. Tyrese Gibson
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess I would be a little put off if the crowd started chanting “Who Are You? Who Are You?” too.

  12. Kourtney Kardashian Pregnant Belly
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d rather raise Naomi Rapace’s baby.

  13. Jake Gyllenhaal Beard Mystery Woman
    Commented on this photo:

    Stop it… I do not have the cutest dimples… You’re embarrassing me…
    -Jake Gyllenhal, forever eroding manliness…

  14. Selena Gomez Justin Bieber Eating Popsicles
    Tom
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d love to see a real biker stomp the shit out of that little bitch. And by little bitch, I of course mean Bieber.

  15. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Pants
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    mmmmmMMMMMMOOOOOOOOooooooooo

    • uhhhhMOOO MOOO!!!!!!!

      • CranAppleSnapple

        MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
        coff
        MOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

      • Kojak

        Mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
        This ass can obviously nuke a bathroom!
        She isn’t armenian! Her family certainly come from north of Armenia, like Chernobyl… This explain the mutant ass…
        …in other hand, ucranian women are very pretty…
        Wait! There comes her mother DNA!

    • Sven Golly

      Cow-ass-a-basas, CA.

    • GeorgeWBush

      USDA Prime Pork

    • spartacus

      MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  16. Arnold Schwarzenegger Sylvester Stallone
    Commented on this photo:

    “Arnold, if we make it to Denny’s before 6, we’re a lock for the early bird special”….

  17. Morgan More Bikini
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    The hips make me wanna impregnate, the face makes me wanna deny it’s mine.

  18. Jennifer Lawrence
    JPC
    Commented on this photo:

    What the fuck? Did her tits double in size over the weekend?

  19. Gwen Stefani Tight Leather Pants Midriff Kingston Rossdale
    Commented on this photo:

    Can’t say I blame the kid… Easy there little Oedipus..

  20. Selena Gomez Justin Bieber Eating Popsicles
    Commented on this photo:

    Everyone who’s ever said that Justin Bieber was a box-muncher is now vindicated.

  21. Bruce Jenner Bad Nose Job
    Commented on this photo:

    Could someone please turn the lights down? My doctor warned me about melting…

  22. Sharon Stone Nipples
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    How much would we have to pay France to keep her? Because I’ll chip in.

  23. Jonah Hil Fat Pumping Gas
    Commented on this photo:

    [img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/02/timer-hartter-340_475.jpg[/img]

    Time for Timer!!!

  24. Simon Cowell
    Commented on this photo:

    “Whoever called this place ‘Providence’ must have been drunk at the time.”

  25. Richard Grieco Sparkly Shirt Red Sunglasses
    Commented on this photo:

    Whaddaya mean I’m not at a premier? AIDS? I got that back in ’89…

  26. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Pants
    JPC
    Commented on this photo:

    Fucking ridiculous. Looks like she’s wearing an XL adult diaper.

    • You know what’s even more ridiculous? This is what she wore to church. Granted, “church” takes place in a conference room at the Agoura Hills Sheraton, but it’s what she considers church all the same.

  27. Jermaine Dupri Straw Hat Tennis Clothes Tall Date BET Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, I know what I want for my birthday…

  28. Bruce Jenner Bad Nose Job
    Commented on this photo:

    His nose is just going to implode I think.

  29. Jake Gyllenhaal Beard Mystery Woman
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Only fame still could get you that kind of reaction out of a pretty girl when you’re dressed like a serial killer’s composite drawing.

  30. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Pants
    Viewer
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s getting hard to tell the difference between Kim’s ass and Kourtney’s stomach.

  31. Richard Grieco Sparkly Shirt Red Sunglasses
    Commented on this photo:

    Keep it shiny Grieco!

  32. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    The centaur lives again!!

  33. Arnold Schwarzenegger Sylvester Stallone
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    They’re trading stories from the 80′s…and also steroids.

  34. Carly Rae Jepsen Canada Day
    Commented on this photo:

    hate this bitch and her stupid song

  35. Jermaine Dupri Straw Hat Tennis Clothes Tall Date BET Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Did he just get off a paddle boat on the Mississippi circa 1890?

  36. Selena Gomez Justin Bieber Eating Popsicles
    Commented on this photo:

    Selena: “see, you just take it down like this..grrggllggg”
    Justin: “Usher likes me to use my molars, nom-nom-nom”

  37. Gwen Stefani Tight Leather Pants Midriff Kingston Rossdale
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like someone is trying to outrun her past.

  38. Carly Rae Jepsen Canada Day
    Commented on this photo:

    If you shoot enough water into her mouth, you get tickets.

  39. Bruce Jenner Bad Nose Job
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Can he be posed, or can we just change the clothes?

  40. Magic Johnson Ice Cream Cone
    Commented on this photo:

    AIDS cone! AIDS cone!

  41. Selena Gomez Justin Bieber Eating Popsicles
    Jarrod
    Commented on this photo:

    “No Justin, like THIS.”

  42. Jake Gyllenhaal Beard Mystery Woman
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Jake: “I bet your brother is gorgeous.”

    Girl [blushing]: “Oh, stop it.”

    Jake: “Is he?”

  43. Simon Cowell
    Commented on this photo:

    Ok ladies go ahead and line up, Simon is ready to judge “Miss Cankle, Providence 2012″

  44. Reese Witherspoon Pregnant Belly
    Commented on this photo:

    Man, she just keeps getting more and more unattractive each day.
    Once upon a time she was hot

  45. Jennifer Lawrence
    Commented on this photo:

    someone wants attention…

    • Mike

      She did “X-Men: First Class” and “The Hunger Games”. I don’t think she’s pulling any Spencer Pratt/Heidi Montag shit here.

  46. Kelly Bensimon Swimsuit Book Release
    Commented on this photo:

    Self-delusion is fun.

  47. Richard Grieco Sparkly Shirt Red Sunglasses
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t want to alarm anyone, but I’m pretty sure he’s turning into Tim Burton.

  48. Amanda Seyfried Legs Butt Booty Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    She has the gangly, pasty legs of a ….wait, WTF? Why do her feet point two different directions???

  49. Sharon Stone Nipples
    Jarrod
    Commented on this photo:

    “All Hail Hypnotoad!”

  50. Jermaine Dupri Straw Hat Tennis Clothes Tall Date BET Awards
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, Morris Day has grown.

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