The Crap We Missed – Monday 7.15.13

July 15th, 2013 // 357 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed, our daily feature of celebrity schadenfreude where I also sometimes clumsily take a stab a relevant cultural events. This weekend saw the end of a high-profile murder trial that’s resulted in a new discussion about race relations in Ameri- OW! *grabs shock collar* Okay, alright, here’s Jay-Z‘s custom made fart-scented mic, the Hugh Jackman photoshop fantasy photo, and you know what? I don’t care, this needs to be said. It’s now become crystal clear to anyone with a brain that black people are still forced to follow a completely different set of social cues than white peo- AHH! OW, FUCK!! *opens Internet Constitution, flips to Article Four: Section Two – Bloggers shall not transpose the discussion of politics, race, or religion with the images of lesbians making blowjob faces or Gwen Stefani‘s hot ass in hotass leather hot pants*

Fine, point taken, you guys wi–WHY DID HE GET OUT OF THE CAR? YOU CAN’T SILENCE ME! (I look forward to your unbridled hate in the comments below),

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Nick Cannon Me Sexy Shirt Universal CityWalk Outdoor Concert Series
    Why oh why
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s not an oversized ball cap, it’s a helmet and cranial plate to protect his swollen cerebrum as he recovers from Mariah sitting on his head

  2. Kelly Monaco Cheryl Burke Grabbing Shanna Moakler Breasts Bikini Nipple Slip
    anonym
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d still fuck all 3 of them together.

    I’m nasty like that

  3. Daniel Radcliffe Dark Circles Under Eyes Pale Skin
    Steve
    Commented on this photo:

    Meth: it’s what’s for dinner.

  4. Selma Blair Nipples No Bra Son Arthur
    Commented on this photo:

    “Charlie Sheen fired… my… mom. Imagine what my life is like…”

  5. Nikolaj Coster Waldau Neckbrace The Other Woman Set
    Commented on this photo:

    “DINKLAGE!!!!”

  6. Anthony Weiner Laughing Hysterically
    Dan
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s one happy Wiener.

  7. Samuel L Jackson Wife LaTanya Richardson
    Jade25479
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m sorry, did my bulge break your concentration?”

  8. Justin Bieber Shirtless Playing With Old Guys Hair Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    In Jackass 4, Steve-O agrees to have Justin Bieber piss in his mouth from 10 feet away.

  9. Jose Canseco Girlfriend Leila Knight Bikini Alex Thomas Celebrity Golf Tournament Pool Party
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Something tells me his hand on the back of her neck is a very frequent thing.

  10. Gwen Stefani Butt Leather Pants
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s always taken being a fashionista pop star very very seriously.
    *wolf whistle*

  11. Pamela Anderson Haggard Face Obliphica Booth Cosmoprof Convention
    Commented on this photo:

    “Pamela Anderson at the Obliphica booth at the Cosmoprof Convention in Vegas.”

    Oh, come on, Photo Boy. If you don’t know exactly where this is from, you don’t have to make up words.

  12. Pamela Anderson Haggard Face Obliphica Booth Cosmoprof Convention
    @&^@*#!~&
    Commented on this photo:

    That dress… It’s like some kind of code, right?

  13. Pamela Anderson Haggard Face Obliphica Booth Cosmoprof Convention
    Commented on this photo:

    so this is the part where pam finds out theres not gonna be any free booze.

  14. Anthony Weiner Laughing Hysterically
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Do it New York!
    I dare ya!

  15. Mariah Carey Cleavage Bruised Shoulder Glittery Sling
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought it was Wendy Williams at first.

  16. Prince William Charity Polo Match
    the old man
    Commented on this photo:

    Yee Haw!! Cotton-Eyed Joe!

  17. Anthony Weiner Laughing Hysterically
    Commented on this photo:

    hes not wearing any pants.

  18. Samuel L Jackson Wife LaTanya Richardson
    WhyHaveMoney?
    Commented on this photo:

    Sam has to have money after acting in 200+ movies. Do yourself a favor and get a Trophy Wife at this point! Damn!

  19. Nick Cannon Me Sexy Shirt Universal CityWalk Outdoor Concert Series
    Suburban Meyer
    Commented on this photo:

    CityWalk Concert. Those are free.

  20. Kelly Monaco Cheryl Burke Grabbing Shanna Moakler Breasts Bikini Nipple Slip
    WhyHaveMoney?
    Commented on this photo:

    That “blonde” bitch is psycho

  21. Gwen Stefani Butt Leather Pants
    MrNasty
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d lick her butthole….that’s all

  22. Daniel Radcliffe Dark Circles Under Eyes Pale Skin
    Suburban Meyer
    Commented on this photo:

    PRESHHHOUSSSSS

  23. Kelly Monaco Cheryl Burke Grabbing Shanna Moakler Breasts Bikini Nipple Slip
    Commented on this photo:

    I think it’s her stomach that needs to be held up.

  24. Jose Canseco Girlfriend Leila Knight Bikini Alex Thomas Celebrity Golf Tournament Pool Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously, what kind of psycho does she have to be to be Jose Canseco’s girlfriend?

  25. Hugh Jackman The Wolverine Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    Love to see this guy without his wig.

  26. Hugh Jackman The Wolverine Press Conference
    AWOL
    Commented on this photo:

    …and then when I have him pretty worked up, I’ll switch to a Western grip like this.
    It isn’t long then before I get a face basting!

  27. Snoop Lion High As Shit
    Commented on this photo:

    Aaron Hernandez = Not Guilty. Right, Snoop?

  28. Constance Marie Legs Butt Short Shorts Crouching Down With Child Mickey Through The Years Collection Launch
    LLBL
    Commented on this photo:

    Little girl is thinking “Bitch Please!”.

  29. William Fichtner Capri Pants Pissed Off Look On Face
    Commented on this photo:

    Doesn’t ring a bell…

  30. Anthony Weiner Laughing Hysterically
    Commented on this photo:

    his nose is migrating into his mouth.

  31. Samuel L Jackson Wife LaTanya Richardson
    Commented on this photo:

    Royale with cheese.
    Cottage cheese.
    Lotta cheese.

  32. Prince William Charity Polo Match
    AWOL
    Commented on this photo:

    “You have failed me for the last time, Right Foot.
    I shall be obliged to take drastic measures.
    Have at you!”

  33. Pamela Anderson Haggard Face Obliphica Booth Cosmoprof Convention
    AWOL
    Commented on this photo:

    I doesn’t seem as if either of these guys are having a problem not looking at her tits.
    It is truly over.

  34. Selma Blair Nipples No Bra Son Arthur
    AWOL
    Commented on this photo:

    “…yeah, I’m tapping those.”

  35. Nick Cannon Me Sexy Shirt Universal CityWalk Outdoor Concert Series
    Zeorge Gimmerman
    Commented on this photo:

    is this anywhere near Fruitvale Station?

  36. Mario Lopez North America Hairstyling Award
    AWOL
    Commented on this photo:

    “and I couldn’t be more proud to accept this beautiful award…

    It is modeled on my own sphincter after spending a weekend at a hairstyling awards show. Thank you all who worked so very, very hard to make this possible, you know who you are.”

  37. Snoop Lion High As Shit
    HairQueen
    Commented on this photo:

    He needs to get his roots done.

  38. John Cusack Scooter Headband All Black Outfit
    Commented on this photo:

    $2 Dollars!!!!!

  39. Constance Marie Legs Butt Short Shorts Crouching Down With Child Mickey Through The Years Collection Launch
    Commented on this photo:

    Speaking for all band aids, the one on her ankle has never been happier.

  40. Jane Lynch Blowjob Face Annie Broadway Final Performance
    Commented on this photo:

    She is having a Flashback to her ex porn/The New Main Street Singers days.

  41. Justin Bieber Shirtless Playing With Old Guys Hair Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Ya, lots of teeth old man that’s how I like it.

  42. Prince William Charity Polo Match
    blerg
    Commented on this photo:

    Two tampon strings?

  43. Serena Williams Butt Leg Stretch Yoga Pants WTA Tournament
    Dr. Oz
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh I get it, it’s one of those visual illusions – if you keep staring at it it switches from a field goal kicker facing left and a pregnant woman facing right.

  44. Jane Lynch Blowjob Face Annie Broadway Final Performance
    Dusty
    Commented on this photo:

    Just ate a bar of soap – a la three stooges

  45. Jay-Z Yahoo Wireless Festival
    MomsErectNipples
    Commented on this photo:

    So they’re advertising e-cigarrettes using Joe Camel?

  46. Matthew McConaughey Scarlett Johansson Dolce & Gabbana Commercial Set
    Notes From The Set
    Commented on this photo:

    “His constant farting left her exhausted.”

  47. Prince William Charity Polo Match
    Jenn
    Commented on this photo:

    Your Highness, the Dept of Silly Walks is one street over.

  48. Samuel L Jackson Wife LaTanya Richardson
    Jules
    Commented on this photo:

    I wouldn’t go so far as to call the wife fat. She’s got a weight problem. What’s the n****r gonna do, her mom named her “LaTanya”.

  49. Kelly Monaco Cheryl Burke Grabbing Shanna Moakler Breasts Bikini Nipple Slip
    brian
    Commented on this photo:

    Lucky bitch. I’ve wanted to squeeze Shanna’s tits for years!

  50. Daniel Radcliffe Dark Circles Under Eyes Pale Skin
    The_Ouroboros
    Commented on this photo:

    Cocaine is a hell of a drug – Rick James.

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