The Crap We Missed – Monday 6.6.11

June 6th, 2011 // 722 Comments

Apparently, “taking a step back” from your marriage means posting more bikini photos on Twitter so guys want to do you. I’m on board.

Welcome to The Crap We Missed: The part of the day where we sift through the ungodly amounts of photos at our disposal and then hurl the best ones in your face like some sort of Internet Rip Taylor. No homo. — Okay, a little. Today, we’ve got Jessica Simpson taking a tour of Yale and wondering when they get to play Quidditch like that college Harry Potter goes to, Chyna returning to her (he/she porn) roots, Black Heff‘s sheer existence canceling out Tila Tequila and the most unbelievable Kirstie Alley photo you’ll ever see in your life. I guess Scientologists really do know magic.

We’re all dead.

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Tara Reid
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    The American Pie money has, but the shaikh money from Rent-A-Starlet hasn’t yet.

  2. Kate Gosselin
    WilmaMankiller
    Commented on this photo:

    I heard she’s participating in a new game show competing with Maw Duggar and the octomom. If you make it thru to the end without your uterus falling out, you get to have your vag sewn permanently shut free of charge. It’s called Who Wants To Do The World A Favor?

  3. Jamie-Lynn Sigler
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    Shut up, Meadow.

  4. Polk
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d love to fill that perfect semen trough in the middle of her back.

  5. Jessica Simpson Jessica Alba Yale University
    Commented on this photo:

    Yale:
    Student body size: 11,500
    Average IQ of student body: 133
    Average IQ of student body, plus those pictured: 132

  6. Jersey Shore Snooki JWoww
    Devo
    Commented on this photo:

    Isn’t this a still shot from the scene in Dumb and Dumber when Lloyd and Harry go on the shopping spree?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4f4EsPBvTk

  7. Jocelyn Wildenstein
    Nice
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait, I don’t get it, is Heidi Montag flicking me off or trying to steal my soul?

  8. Tara Reid
    AT
    Commented on this photo:

    pearl necklace gone wrong.

  9. Kirstie Alley Thin Skinny
    adolf hitler
    Commented on this photo:

    good. now if she could just lose a few decades…

  10. Orlando Bloom Miranda Kerr
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow. I think he’s pretty (when he’s groomed), but next to her, he’s … well, looking satisfied, at least.

  11. Kourtney Kardashian Khloe Kardashian
    Chip Whitley
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like someone spliced the genes of Chewbacca, Miss Piggy and Boy George.

  12. Orlando Bloom Miranda Kerr
    AT
    Commented on this photo:

    luckiest bastard in the world.

  13. Jaime King
    adolf hitler
    Commented on this photo:

    you wanna talk about motherssssssss!!!!

  14. Jersey Shore Snooki JWoww
    Commented on this photo:

    JWoww is a good friend for helping Snooki wheel her sack lunch.

  15. Jocelyn Wildenstein
    Chip Whitley
    Commented on this photo:

    Lion-O can’t be happy about how much Cheetara has let herself go.

  16. Sarah Gilbert
    adolf hitler
    Commented on this photo:

    you know youre a redneck if you come from a rural area and behave as such.

  17. Kourtney Kardashian Khloe Kardashian
    adolf hitler
    Commented on this photo:

    whats up with the chyna pics today?

  18. Mr. T
    Commented on this photo:

    You know what Mr. T carries in his bag? Chuck Norris.

  19. Tara Reid
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, now she has to resort to stealing cars?

  20. Jack Black Kung Fu Panda 2
    WilmaMankiller
    Commented on this photo:

    I really owe those pants a big thank you just for being there.

  21. Kate Gosselin
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    I would toss it in her hair and then call her a bitch as I was walking out.

  22. Jocelyn Wildenstein
    Commented on this photo:

    Fish, what’s your mailing address? I need to bill you for a new computer. I just puked on mine.

  23. Jon Hamm
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, I guess he just saw that Chyna pic too.

  24. Andrew Dice Clay
    Commented on this photo:

    The Diceman falleth.

  25. Orlando Bloom Miranda Kerr
    Hugh Jass
    Commented on this photo:

    She has the same head as Tila Tequila…. just saying.

  26. Sophie Turner
    Commented on this photo:

    What porno is she in again?

  27. Kourtney Kardashian Khloe Kardashian
    Loulou
    Commented on this photo:

    These two CANNOT come from the same vagina. Impossible.

  28. Mark Ballas
    Mandi
    Commented on this photo:

    Be mine forever.

  29. Black Heff Ice-T Coco Renew Vows
    Commented on this photo:

    “Okay, for the first part of our reception party, we thought we’d do a decorate your own cup craft. Afterwards, we’ll be finger painting, and finally, cake and a piñata.”

  30. Mr. T
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    seriously thought he died from cancer a few years ago. way to go Mr. T!

  31. Venom

    Nice, you have to love women who are back on the market.
    She is going to be banging the snot out of a bunch of guys for the foreseeable future.

  32. Andrew Dice Clay
    The Pope of Cleveland
    Commented on this photo:

    Hello? 1990? Please pick up! Oh!

  33. Chyna Porn
    WilmaMankiller
    Commented on this photo:

    Khloe? Is that you?

  34. Kourtney Kardashian Khloe Kardashian
    Large Pun
    Commented on this photo:

    Obama in the background?

  35. Kate Gosselin
    meh
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice gams. Pretty legs, too.

  36. Delgo
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll have Congressman Weiner send her a direct message on Twitter for me.

  37. Jersey Shore Snooki JWoww
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    Which venereal diseases causes accelerated leg hair growth?

  38. Jack Black Kung Fu Panda 2
    tony
    Commented on this photo:

    Ha ha! How zany! This man must be a comedian!

  39. Kourtney Kardashian Khloe Kardashian
    WilmaMankiller
    Commented on this photo:

    Thank god she’s clothed. That nasty ass bathing suit pic made me vomit.

  40. Jack Black Kung Fu Panda 2
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Typical Hollywood star these days. No attractive, not particularly talented, and works cheap.

  41. Kirstie Alley Thin Skinny
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Not bad from the boobs up.

  42. Jack Black Kung Fu Panda 2
    Abby Normal
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, it’s like looking at a slightly less disgusting version of Christina Aguilera…

  43. Kourtney Kardashian Khloe Kardashian
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    I think I’ve got it. The Kardashians are really Hoss, Adam, and little Joe.

    This would be Hoss and little Joe of course.

  44. Jocelyn Wildenstein
    Mike Walker
    Commented on this photo:

    Five dolla fucky sucky! I no kid!

  45. Jessica Simpson Jessica Alba Yale University
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Students of Yale, we present to you today a cautionary tale of Hollywood. We have here two formerly hot women named Jessica…

  46. Mark Ballas
    Abby Normal
    Commented on this photo:

    The much coveted pit hair growing all down my arm tattoo. Good for him!

  47. Kirstie Alley Thin Skinny
    ahole
    Commented on this photo:

    I do her with Kate Gosselin’s cock,

  48. Jaime King
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    How did Lindsay get out of her compound, and where is her ankle monitor?

  49. Kourtney Kardashian Khloe Kardashian
    Mike Walker
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Mimi Fariña and Mama Cass at the Monterey Pop festival.

  50. Kirstie Alley Thin Skinny
    chev70
    Commented on this photo:

    Just think of all that excess skin. Mmmmm.

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