The Crap We Missed – Monday 5.5.14

May 5th, 2014 // 373 Comments

Welcome back to regular installments of The Crap We Missed. I know you’ve all been experiencing some terrible withdrawl, just curled up in the shower, rocking yourselves and mumbling “What’s going on with Gerard Butler? Is he still traveling the world making love to strangers in temporary crappers? Did any whores totally whore themselves on Instagram? Do d-list celebrities even have butts anymore?! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SHOW US!!”

Whoa. Calm down now, shh, shh…we’ve got you covered with an extra side of urban contemporary Tom Berenger. You’re all going to be fine,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Heidi Klum Bikini Eating Popsicle Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    So she’s sucked off white guys, black guys, Asian guys, and American Indian guys. Fine, but who’s the green guy?

  2. Joanna Krupa Naked Angel PETA Ad Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Of course a chicken is pro-vegetarianism.

  3. Macaulay Culkin Slicked Back Hair The Pizza Underground Show
    Commented on this photo:

    EDDIE LIVES!

  4. Meghan McCain Cleavage John McCain 100th Annual White House Correspondents Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    Careful john. She already ate Cindy and seems to be eyeballing you.

  5. Jame Lynn Spears Daughter Maddie Briann Aldridge Watching Britney Vegas Show
    Commented on this photo:

    My money’s on Maddie for being the highest-functioning Spears.

  6. Macaulay Culkin Slicked Back Hair The Pizza Underground Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Sons of Menarche.

  7. Heidi Klum Bikini Eating Popsicle Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    This is the rich supermodel equivalent of an OK Cupid profile…

  8. Khloe Kardashian Tiny Waist Huge Ass Mirror Selfie Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    The door actually has curved moldings.

  9. Donatella Versace Anna Wintour Costume Center Grand Opening
    Beltliner
    Commented on this photo:

    This must be from the episode where Gollum used a fake ID to rent a car, then drove to the Knoxville Wig Outlet with Milhouse, Nelson, and Martin.

  10. Macaulay Culkin Slicked Back Hair The Pizza Underground Show
    Commented on this photo:

    All kidding aside, he looks healthier.

  11. Khloe Kardashian Tiny Waist Huge Ass Mirror Selfie Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Only a Kardashian would buy a warped door so that people can’t accuse her of photoshop….

  12. Steven Tyler Bending Over 21st Annual Race To Erase MS Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yes, I do think that once we’ve elucidated the full immunologic etiology of multiple sclerosis, we can proceed to other demyelinating diseases, including leukodystrophies, tabes dorsalis, and even Gullain-Barré syndrome. SHIBBIDDA SHABBADDA SHAPPATTA WoOoOoOoO!”

  13. Jame Lynn Spears Daughter Maddie Briann Aldridge Watching Britney Vegas Show
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mommy, these ear plugs are great! I can barely hear auntie’s music…”

  14. Jake Gyllenhaal Antoine Fuqua Making Fists Mayweather VS Maidana Pre Fight Party
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet someone could Photoshop a few microphones in there.

  15. Gerard Butler Grabbing Womans Arm
    Commented on this photo:

    “Come with me if you want to pee… And fornicate…”

  16. Kendra Wilkinson Huge Pregnant Belly Cleavage Hank Baskett Hank Jr
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, she has one of those Disneyland balloons in her shirt.

  17. Serena Williams Cleavage Crazy Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    “HULK LOVE TAPAS!”

  18. Serena Williams Cleavage Crazy Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    Somewhere, big bird is crawled up featherless in the fetal position mumbling something about a black she-hulk…

  19. Donatella Versace Anna Wintour Costume Center Grand Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    More like Donatello.

  20. Shauna Sand Bikini
    Cuddles
    Commented on this photo:

    I almost didn’t recognize her without her 8 inch clear plastic stripper shoes.

  21. Meghan McCain Cleavage John McCain 100th Annual White House Correspondents Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, I can think of at least 2 ways John might have improved his poll numbers…

  22. Brooklyn Decker Cleavage 100th Annual White House Correspondents Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    Dayummmmm

  23. Alessandra Ambrosio Legs Daisy Dukes
    Commented on this photo:

    Looking at TheSuperficial Mobile.

    “Godammit, Don Zaloog…”

  24. Donatella Versace Anna Wintour Costume Center Grand Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    Does this mean Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem is getting back together?

  25. Macaulay Culkin Slicked Back Hair The Pizza Underground Show
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess since Michael died, he doesn’t need to crack pipe to sleep anymore.

  26. Kourtney Kardashian Nipples Carrying Daughter Penelope
    Commented on this photo:

    “Honey. I know you don’t want to see Aunt Chewie, but it’s only for a few minutes. Come on!”

  27. Coco Cleavage Instagram
    Pickle Nose
    Commented on this photo:

    Are we sure this isn’t Megan McCain with lots of fake tanner?

  28. Heidi Klum Bikini Eating Popsicle Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    All the colors of the rainbow, right in her mouth.
    So, just a typical weekend for her.

  29. Dita Von Teese Bra See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Still waiting to see a picture of her that includes either human complexion or emotion.

  30. Jame Lynn Spears Daughter Maddie Briann Aldridge Watching Britney Vegas Show
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Training the future generation on how to be a good money-train.

  31. Shauna Sand Bikini
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    The photo makes me think of her as a largemouth bass carefully accessorized with lipstick, implants, tattoos, spray tan and a sex tape.

  32. Jennifer Love Hewitt Fat Post Baby Weight Brian Hallisay Baby Daughter Autumn
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Why are her eyes glowing red all the time?? And are these fucking HORNS??

  33. Donatella Versace Anna Wintour Costume Center Grand Opening
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Behold one of the planet’s trendsetters and famous fashionistas….aren’t we beautiful?

  34. Donatella Versace Anna Wintour Costume Center Grand Opening
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    The inventor of still photography didn’t account for this.

  35. Jame Lynn Spears Daughter Maddie Briann Aldridge Watching Britney Vegas Show
    Commented on this photo:

    DUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHhhhhh

  36. Tom Berenger Beret Scarf
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    I think that’s Tom Berenger.

  37. Prince Harry With Guy Screaming At Young Woman
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    HEY, I’M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU AGAIN, THE PRINCE NEEDS A PBR, PRONTO!!!

  38. Kourtney Kardashian Nipples Carrying Daughter Penelope
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    When informed by Maury that Scott Disick was indeed her father, Penelope was inconsolable.

  39. Macaulay Culkin Slicked Back Hair The Pizza Underground Show
    Commented on this photo:

    You ever been to Pomona?

    Culkin has…Culkin has.

  40. Scott Speedman Basketball Hipster Clothes
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Hello Scott, this is Siri. We really need to talk about your fashion choices…

  41. Donatella Versace Anna Wintour Costume Center Grand Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    my penis demands an apology

  42. Heidi Klum Bikini Eating Popsicle Instagram
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Proving she is an anti-racist by blowing the United Colors of Benetton

  43. Jennifer Love Hewitt Fat Post Baby Weight Brian Hallisay Baby Daughter Autumn
    Doctor_Joystick
    Commented on this photo:

    His t-shirt is missing the word “animal” in the middle.

  44. Heidi Klum Bikini Eating Popsicle Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    She can suck on my Popsicle anytime.

  45. Meghan McCain Cleavage John McCain 100th Annual White House Correspondents Dinner
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Let me guess, he married her for her intellect.

  46. Macaulay Culkin Slicked Back Hair The Pizza Underground Show
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Mila ain’t coming back, even if you are the bad boy in the band.

  47. Macaulay Culkin Slicked Back Hair The Pizza Underground Show
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s the best I’ve seen him look for a long time.

  48. Meghan McCain Cleavage John McCain 100th Annual White House Correspondents Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    Fatty and the T. Rex.

    This Fall on NBC.

  49. Gerard Butler Grabbing Womans Arm
    Sterling Silver
    Commented on this photo:

    Tell me that’s not Noomi Rapace.

  50. Katharine McPhee Cleavage Boob Window Dress Google Netflix White House Correspondents Weekend Party
    Commented on this photo:

    my #1 celebrity crush. Oh, this woman.

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