The Crap We Missed – Monday 5.19.14

May 19th, 2014 // 498 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed, a super-sized selection of what happened to be a weekend of a zillion events, even though I definitely focused way too hard on The Expendables 3 premiere at Cannes. But there’s also stuff from The BAFTA Awards where Helena Bonham Carter somehow managed to look not homeless as well as Jason Statham discovering MDMA and I’m talking the good shit that can only delivered to you vaginally from Lindsay Lohan, not whatever bullshit Banderas slipped everybody at lunch.

And duh, butts. There will always be butts,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Alec Baldwin Hilaria Baldwin Daughter Carmen Hamptons
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ha Ha …what’s in your diaper ?”

  2. Sam Neill Moustache TV BAFTA Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    “Table for two ..please follow me Monsiuer.”

  3. Busta Rhymes Fat Belly High As Shit Bodyguard
    Commented on this photo:

    Woo-hah! Got ya all in check! (Except you, blood sugar.)

  4. Robert Pattinson Surprised Face The Rover Premiere 67th Cannes Film Festival
    Freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m surprised he’s still around since the Twilight franchise ended.

  5. Melanie Griffith Bra Cleavage See Through Shirt
    renotastic
    Commented on this photo:

    Paz de la Huerta called. She wants her shine back.

  6. Viggo Mortensen Jauja Photo Call 67th Cannes Film Festival
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Je t’aime
    Only because I don’t have to live with him amid the bohemian funk of incense, turpentine, cigarettes and BO.

  7. Coco Butt Side Boob String Bikini Leg Stretch Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Acromegaly is no laughing matter. I think it’s great that Coco is making it work for her.

  8. Coco Butt Side Boob String Bikini Leg Stretch Instagram
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t realize it was that sunny in Newfoundland at this time of year.

  9. Jay Leno Pulling Up Pant Leg Che Tempo Che Fa
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Actually, this looks a bit like my dad recounting the story of how he was bitten by a viper.

  10. Lena Dunham Striped Green Pants
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘Okay look, I’ll lower my price to a dollar…okay 50 cents…alright I’ll pay you.’

  11. Helena Bonham Carter Cleavage TV BAFTA Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d like to do her while she was dressed as her character in Harry Potter.

  12. Naomi Campbell Cleavage TV BAFTA Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    The fucking you’d get would not be worth the fucking you’d take.

  13. Arnold Schwarzenegger Shirtless Filming With Ipad On Balcony Cannes
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Arnold tweets ‘Gerry Lee Lewis guy never ages, huh? #whatshissecret #antiaging’

  14. Helena Bonham Carter Cleavage TV BAFTA Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s never been the same still last week when someone broke in and stole all her rags.

  15. Jason Statham Drunk High Gotha Club
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Here’s to my 53rd mediocre, formulaic action movie.

  16. Pamela Anderson Nipple Slip Cleavage Drunk High Tired
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he wearing sweat pants or is he half a Hasidic Jew?

  17. Antonio Banderas Sylvester Stallone Kelsey Grammer The Expendables 3 Photo Call Cannes
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Hyah, the Texas Minute Men strike again!

  18. Anastasia Ashley Butt Bikini Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she has scoliosis. Whats wrong with me?

  19. Robert Pattinson Surprised Face The Rover Premiere 67th Cannes Film Festival
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    So, a number of young women from British Columbia are saying you are the the father of their child.

  20. Harrison Ford Kelsey Grammer Sylvester Stallone The Expendables 3 Photo Call Cannes
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    A clip on…pfft.

  21. Alec Baldwin Hilaria Baldwin Daughter Carmen Hamptons
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Speaking of which, isn’t Ireland tweeting pics of her ass any more?

  22. Gerard Depardieu Yelling From Backseat Cannes
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s reacting like I would to the sight of an unwaxed Kardashian.

  23. Harrison Ford Kelsey Grammer Sylvester Stallone The Expendables 3 Photo Call Cannes
    JungleRed
    Commented on this photo:

    Suck it dude’s! Time’s a bitch for everyone.

  24. Prince Charles Camilla Dutchess of Cornwall Exiting Plane
    JungleRed
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t judge me!

  25. Viggo Mortensen Jauja Photo Call 67th Cannes Film Festival
    Liz
    Commented on this photo:

    Yep, I’d still hit it.

  26. Lea Seydoux Cleavage Bitchface Saint Laurent Premiere Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    What I’ve taken from this site is that women named “Lea” really want you to see their boobs.

  27. Lena Dunham Striped Green Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Man, Bruce Jenner looks terrible.

  28. Kelly Rowland Cleavage Legs Slit Dress Billlboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    God damn, she is HOT!

  29. Lea Seydoux Cleavage Bitchface Saint Laurent Premiere Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks talented.

  30. Samuel L. Jackson
    Tommy
    Commented on this photo:

    You think the giant, red “X” on only one of his bags is some sort of secret signal to the aliens?

  31. Mel Gibson Bring Back Our Girls Sign Kellan Lutz Antonio Banderas The Expendables 3 Premiere Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    Hating on Mel is so much fun!

  32. Samuel L. Jackson
    Commented on this photo:

    YESSS Photoboy. Kudos

  33. Arnold Schwarzenegger Shirtless Filming With Ipad On Balcony Cannes
    Voice of Reisling
    Commented on this photo:

    Two and a Half Menz

  34. Mischa Barton Huge Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    She should not be smiling.

  35. Kaley Cuoco Butt Riding Pants Horeseback Equestrian Tournament
    Commented on this photo:

    This picture wins the day — spanktacular!

  36. Dita Von Teese Cleavage Lingerie Launch Bloomingdales
    Commented on this photo:

    HAG

  37. Naomi Campbell Cleavage TV BAFTA Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Fake ass hair – PASS

  38. Coco Butt Side Boob String Bikini Leg Stretch Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    At least she doesn’t have peg legs to go with her balloon ass.

  39. Chris Christie 2nd Annual Champions Of Jewish Values Gala
    Spleen
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuckbag

  40. Mel Gibson Bring Back Our Girls Sign Kellan Lutz Antonio Banderas The Expendables 3 Premiere Cannes
    anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    Kellan Lutz looks more like Kellan Putz with that permanent goof look.

  41. Robert Pattinson Surprised Face The Rover Premiere 67th Cannes Film Festival
    anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    “Who has the smaller dick? You or Kristen?”

  42. Sofia Vergara Butt Bandage Dress Brad Pitt Annual Make It Right Gala
    anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    Is it just me or is she walking around with something sticking out of her ass?

  43. Gerard Depardieu Yelling From Backseat Cannes
    anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    “Remember when Katherine Heigl played your daughter in Green Card and she wore a thong?”

  44. Jay Leno Pulling Up Pant Leg Che Tempo Che Fa
    Commented on this photo:

    ..And this is where Joey Lawrence bit me when I said he couldn’t have any of my Doritos!

  45. Harrison Ford Kelsey Grammer Sylvester Stallone The Expendables 3 Photo Call Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does Stallone always buy his suits one size too small?

  46. Taylor Swift Crazy Skinny Legs Heels
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like a boring prude.

  47. Coco Butt Side Boob String Bikini Leg Stretch Instagram
    lawn
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s times like this that I kind of miss Randall.

  48. Arnold Schwarzenegger Shirtless Filming With Ipad On Balcony Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    “Vhat is an eleven letter vurd for Latina Houzekeeper? It vould be M- E- _ – I- C- A-_ M- A- I-_?

  49. Pamela Anderson Nipple Slip Cleavage Drunk High Tired
    Commented on this photo:

    WTF? Is that her little boy?

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