The Crap We Missed – Monday 5.14.12

May 14th, 2012 // 683 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed which is bursting at the seams from a weekend full of hidden paparazzi gems. Gems like Goldie Hawn‘s timeless beauty, which applies to Brooke Shields as well. Big black microphones start to look small in Serena Williams‘ hands, Ryan Phillipe‘s dick becomes a divining rod, Simon Cowell gives side boob a shot, and Jeremy Renner hits up the Lakers game with Travolta‘s masseuse.

Remember when James Franco played James Dean? Because James Franco really wants you to remember when he played James Dean,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Lease agreements available for daily, weekly or monthly rentals.

  2. Pauly D
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    “If Paris can be a DJ, I can be a fuckin’ DJ! Now, how come I can’t hear the music I’m spinnin’?!?”

  3. Val Kilmer
    Commented on this photo:

    I was named after St. Christopher….

  4. Jay-Z
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    ” . . . yo! there’s a white Honda, license plate ABC 123 in the lot with its lights on . . .”

  5. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Are her shoulders made of clay?

  6. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Can you imagine the size of the balls on this douche? As he looks in the mirror- “Who’s your daddy? I’M your fuckin’ daddy.”

  7. Rita Ora Panty Flash Upskirt
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow. I would not have expected underwear on her.

  8. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She needs more hair extensions.

  9. Big Sean Sagging Pants Crotch Grab
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    The bleachers were full until about 30 seconds ago…

  10. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    At first, I was drawn to the overly-taut and stretched-out face, receding hairline, man hands, fupa, and chasm between her formerly perky boobs (which have now descended to a spot 3″ above her waistline). But then I saw it…she pulled an “Iron Sheik”…she pissed herself! Or maybe it’s just swamp vag…I don’t know. Either way – AWESOME!

  11. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    Commented on this photo:

    Do they not test Tennis players for steroids?!

  12. Ryan Phillipe
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    THAT is the pose of a man who is at a kids’ football game and has his balls stuck to his leg.

  13. Ian Somerhalder Nina Dobrev Legs Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    As usual, hot chick with a douchebag.

  14. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    For a woman her age, who’s spent most of her life in the sun, she’d still make a wayyyyyy better centerfold than Tan Mom.
    Just sayin’…

  15. Brooke Shields
    Commented on this photo:

    How many fucking award functions are there?

  16. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Anyone (else) bear witness to this aggrandizing zilch on “Celebrity Apprentice”? Honey, you may very well be a (self-annointed) genius compared to the likes of Deborah Gibson, Clay Aiken and Arsenio Hall; but they’re all blithering idiots, so…

  17. Ian Somerhalder Nina Dobrev Legs Short Shorts
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Manicured, pedicured, exfoliated and accessorized to within an inch of their lives.

  18. Deena Cortese Butt Legs Tight Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    And she is there because she’s singing now? Someone needs to drop a bomb on New Jersey before any more off the tools get out. Just make sure to let the cool people know before setting it off.

  19. Sienna Miller Pregnant Tight Dress
    fetish
    Commented on this photo:

    prettiest pregnant woman. its between her an kristin cavallari

  20. Deena Cortese Butt Legs Tight Minidress
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    “K.I.S.S.” = “Keep It Simple, Stupid”.
    “K.I.I.S.” = “Keep It Indoors, Slut”.

  21. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    BlackAndWhite.Minstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    my best friend’s mom makes $6000 an hour on a yacht….

  22. Mariah Carey Cleavage
    fetish
    Commented on this photo:

    hot

  23. Sienna Miller Pregnant Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Where’s her schleprock, emo baby maker? He sure as hell ain’t carrying the luggage. The guy makes Beiber look like a fuckin’ badass…

  24. Nicki Minaj Butt Underwear See Through Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Fat ass in a little tutu, Fat ass in a little tutu

  25. Nicki Minaj Butt Underwear See Through Skirt
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    No self-respecting tranny would ever dress like this woman.

  26. Jay-Z
    Commented on this photo:

    “We always knew when it was time for Mr. Z’s num nums.”

  27. Kendra Wilkinson Bikini
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does she even wear clothes? I think I’ve actually seen her tonsils from the bottom up at this point.

  28. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    “Thank you very much! Now, gentlemen, if there are no other viewing requests, shall we start the bidding at…$1,000 for the night?”

  29. Maria Menounos Bruises Legs Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s hot unlike the previous 2 posted who are worthless pieces of the white specks on top of chicken shit.

  30. Mariah Carey Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    How does she have time to peddle sneakers? Aren’t she and Mr. Carry busy renewing their vows…again?

  31. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    “I can’t believe no one placed a bid on me.”

  32. Snooki Baby Bump Legs Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    No she thinks she’s Lady Gagme. I hope this bitch falls on her fat ass and breaks everything.

  33. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Now that’s a flat ass.

  34. Jeremy Renner Penny Marshall
    tito
    Commented on this photo:

    while glad the staples center installed port-a-potty seats she still has to remind herself to bring enough toilet paper if she’s going to go for the tuesday two-fer burrito special.

  35. Jay-Z
    dooood
    Commented on this photo:

    philly is such a shithole. still it’ll be interesting to see what happens when all his idiot fans encounter the nitrous mafia.
    i’m sure they’ll work things out rationally and peacefully.

  36. Maria Menounos Bruises Legs Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    Just…a…little…bit…higher…PLEASE!

  37. Dominique Storelli Bikini
    tito
    Commented on this photo:

    i hear martin scorcese is considering her for a role in…ahahahahahah, sorry i couldn’t get it out.

  38. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought this chick had bolt ons? Why does she have the padded top?

  39. Rita Ora Panty Flash Upskirt
    tito
    Commented on this photo:

    im not sure if her vagina looks like that or if my mind just keeps blanking it out.

  40. Cristiano Ronaldo Feeds Irina Shayk Chocolate
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mr Ronaldo demonstrates a vomit-inducing technique he learned from Kiera Knightley.”

  41. Big Sean Sagging Pants Crotch Grab
    tito
    Commented on this photo:

    from that angle it either looks like “small sean” or “it’s really cold out” sean.

  42. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    tito
    Commented on this photo:

    kirsten dunst is looking…oh wait.

  43. Katherine Heigl Midriff Sports Bra Yoga Pants
    tito
    Commented on this photo:

    jesus, wasn’t one goldie hawn pic enough?

  44. Cristiano Ronaldo Feeds Irina Shayk Chocolate
    dooood
    Commented on this photo:

    aww that’s cute.
    next time, make your god damn penalty kicks!
    and tell ramos that he sucks

  45. Sienna Miller Pregnant Tight Dress
    tito
    Commented on this photo:

    she used to be siena miller lite.

  46. Pauly D
    BlackAndWhite.Minstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    You know, I’ve some great ringtones on my phone but will the big clubs let me play them? Will they fuck, it’s all politics.

  47. Maria Menounos Bruises Legs Minidress
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    shit, that ain’t nothing. i would have her screaming the predetermined safe word.

  48. Rita Ora Panty Flash Upskirt
    dooood
    Commented on this photo:

    tease…. hey is that nick cannon behind her?
    british nick cannon perhaps?

  49. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    tito
    Commented on this photo:

    it looks like her stomach is trying to suffocate her vagina with a napkin.

  50. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    i almost want to believe that’s a tampon string, but she hasn’t needed one of those for at least 10 years.

Leave A Comment