The Crap We Missed – Monday 5.14.12

May 14th, 2012 // 683 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed which is bursting at the seams from a weekend full of hidden paparazzi gems. Gems like Goldie Hawn‘s timeless beauty, which applies to Brooke Shields as well. Big black microphones start to look small in Serena Williams‘ hands, Ryan Phillipe‘s dick becomes a divining rod, Simon Cowell gives side boob a shot, and Jeremy Renner hits up the Lakers game with Travolta‘s masseuse.

Remember when James Franco played James Dean? Because James Franco really wants you to remember when he played James Dean,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Big Sean Sagging Pants Crotch Grab
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Courtney Love got lucky last night.

  2. Big Sean Sagging Pants Crotch Grab
    Commented on this photo:

    This just looks unhygienic.

  3. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    Commented on this photo:

    Informing the crowd that her secret to success is that she’s always angry

  4. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    metoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Rain Man’s counting cigarettes…

  5. Pauly D
    Commented on this photo:

    He only plays beats that sound like Douche! Douche! Douche! Douche! Douche! Douche!

  6. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Beauty in its most natural form.

  7. Nicki Minaj Butt Underwear See Through Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like 2 baked hams in a cage match, where the cage is made of mosquito netting.

  8. Val Kilmer
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    No, not that Batman movie…the shitty one.

  9. Val Kilmer
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, Val. We’ll always have “Willow”.

  10. Jaime Pressly Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she mom enough?

  11. Jennifer Love Hewitt Cellulite Legs
    Commented on this photo:

    Guess which leg is airbrushed.

  12. Jennifer Love Hewitt Cellulite Legs
    Dick Hell
    Commented on this photo:

    From the chin down… now THAT’S a cankle!

  13. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    StayPuft Overlord
    Commented on this photo:

    I wish I had three hands, so I could give those tities three thumbs down!

  14. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA BRA.

  15. Ian Somerhalder Nina Dobrev Legs Short Shorts
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Does he shop at Douchebags-R-Us?

  16. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    what a fucking douche bag.

  17. Big Sean Sagging Pants Crotch Grab
    Commented on this photo:

    By the looks of the empty seats, Big Sean isn’t so big.

  18. Big Sean Sagging Pants Crotch Grab
    Dick Hell
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess it explains why the first 12 rows of seats are empty.

  19. Deena Cortese Butt Legs Tight Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    Amercia’s got talent. Yessiree.

  20. Brooke Shields
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Here mirror just told her that she hasn’t been the fairest of them all in 25 years.

  21. Jay-Z
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Those lips….those eyes…I am reminded of my childhood freshwater aquarium, and the giant oscar that ate earthworms from my hand all day long until it died from it.

  22. Pauly D
    Commented on this photo:

    “Why does the marquee say “Pauly D-bag’… ohhhhhhhh.”

  23. Katherine Heigl Midriff Sports Bra Yoga Pants
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    She almost looks like she’s trying to smile in this picture. Must be a trick of the light.

  24. Nicki Minaj Butt Underwear See Through Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s the Stay Puff No Talent Whore….

  25. Ryan Phillipe
    Anon
    Commented on this photo:

    Schwing~!

  26. Christina Hendricks Cleavage
    The Winchester
    Commented on this photo:

    This one still image contains more emoting than all of January Jones filmography.

    And a better rack.

  27. Maria Menounos Bruises Legs Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    The price you pay for rejecting the Dinklage…

  28. Maria Menounos Bruises Legs Minidress
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Chris Brown is quick.

  29. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage
    BlackAndWhite.Minstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    So it’s O Day as in O Day exploit for the genetic code?

  30. James Franco Rebel Mural
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    His physical appearance and demeanor negate his spray-painted thought bubble.

  31. James Franco Rebel Mural
    Commented on this photo:

    “If only I didn’t have the handwriting of a 5-year old; Then people would remember me for the rebel I played in that movie that one time.”

  32. Deena Cortese Butt Legs Tight Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    just caught myself thinking of eating this ones ass. better call my neurosurgeon to see if i have brain tumor…

  33. Snooki Baby Bump Legs Short Shorts
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh shit, I forgot my dignity!

  34. Val Kilmer
    Commented on this photo:

    Iceman ate Slider.

  35. Brooke Shields
    Dick Hell
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like her complimentary celebrity gift-bag should have included a tube of Preparation-H.

  36. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    For a second I thought it was a pale Mickey Rourke.

  37. Anthony Kiedis Everly Bear Scooter
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    That is a good choice of garb to be worn while out in traffic on a scooter…with your kid.

  38. Ian Somerhalder Nina Dobrev Legs Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    Who?

  39. Mariah Carey Cleavage
    Dick Hell
    Commented on this photo:

    OMG, her camel toe reaches all the way up to her chest!

  40. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    kimmykimkim
    Commented on this photo:

    That looks like it’s gonna hurt. Only for a little bit though.

  41. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    His hairy side (man)boob is nasty but I suspect more than a few that come to this site would still love to hit it anyway. ;)

  42. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    pssstt…we really don’t.

  43. Brooke Shields
    Commented on this photo:

    Vince Vaughn in drag?

  44. Jaime Pressly Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    SOB
    Commented on this photo:

    MILF

  45. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    Commented on this photo:

    “Haahahahaha… been there, done this….hahahahahhaha”

  46. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    I swear to God my collie did that when I tried to chain him up in the backyard.

  47. Jennifer Love Hewitt Cellulite Legs
    Commented on this photo:

    Out of frame: running appliance repairman.

  48. Jennifer Love Hewitt Cellulite Legs
    metoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Even her knees have cellulite.

  49. Deena Cortese Butt Legs Tight Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    *My eyes*

  50. Sienna Miller Pregnant Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Do not want.

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