The Crap We Missed – Monday 5.14.12

May 14th, 2012 // 683 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed which is bursting at the seams from a weekend full of hidden paparazzi gems. Gems like Goldie Hawn‘s timeless beauty, which applies to Brooke Shields as well. Big black microphones start to look small in Serena Williams‘ hands, Ryan Phillipe‘s dick becomes a divining rod, Simon Cowell gives side boob a shot, and Jeremy Renner hits up the Lakers game with Travolta‘s masseuse.

Remember when James Franco played James Dean? Because James Franco really wants you to remember when he played James Dean,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Christina Hendricks Cleavage
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    There is something different about Marcia Cross.

  2. Jada Pinkett Smith Tramp Stamp Backless Dress MIBIII
    guest
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is Rumor Willis dressed as the Church Lady and groping random breasts?

  3. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    Joaquin ingles
    Commented on this photo:

    “Oh yeah, Hasslehoff? Check THESE out, bitch.”

  4. James Franco Rebel Mural
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, it’s like a pictogram. R-douche-B-E-L.

  5. Jay-Z
    girl dylan
    Commented on this photo:

    as he thinks “I don’t know, I just don’t see what Kim keeps raving about…”

  6. Anthony Kiedis Everly Bear Scooter
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Good charlotte that’s embarrassing.

  7. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    girl dylan
    Commented on this photo:

    Bras are SO 1972.

  8. Kiersten Warren Nipples Cleavage Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    She puts the “tit” in “titian haired cutie.” yum yum.

  9. Jaime Pressly Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Even her son is staring at her ass.

  10. Val Kilmer
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Will Ferrell as Harry Carey without his glasses.

  11. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Oldie Hawn

  12. Christina Hendricks Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    A ginger with alabaster skin and a great rack. What more could I ask for?

  13. James Franco Rebel Mural
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like he auditioned for a spelling bee.

  14. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    What a smug prick. How about we get him and “the Hoff” to do a gladiator fight to the death on Pay-per-View…and then shoot the one who wins!

  15. Dominique Storelli Bikini
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Kelly Bundy?

  16. Jay-Z
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Thinking: “I still can’t believe I let that bitch talk me into a baby.”

  17. Rita Ora Panty Flash Upskirt
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s amazing what passes for talent these days.

  18. Brooke Shields
    Joaquin ingles
    Commented on this photo:

    I think something just came in between her and her Calvins.

  19. Ryan Phillipe
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    You see kids, if you let one go just right, you get liftoff.

  20. Jaime Pressly Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mommy, why are those guys staring at your boobies?”

  21. Pauly D
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Looking at the hot guy dancing above.

  22. Jennifer Love Hewitt Cellulite Legs
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Must be a leftie. That would explain the carpal tunnel bandage from all the dildo work.

  23. Dominique Storelli Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “Miss, I’m afraid if you’re going to be wearing that ass in public, you’re going to need a permit…”

  24. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    All I remember are two movies. “There’s a Girl in My Soup”, and “Butterflies are Free”.

  25. Jay-Z
    Commented on this photo:

    “Thank you ladies and gentlemen for the warm welcome. Here to give my announcement, because he knows nobody can do it better than he can, give it up for Kanye West…”

  26. Brooke Shields
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Really need to lay off the roids.

  27. Deena Cortese Butt Legs Tight Minidress
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Later that day: “A bandage dress worn by Deena Cortese snapped and killed 12 innocent bystanders.”

  28. Sienna Miller Pregnant Tight Dress
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    On her way to Maury Povich.

  29. Katherine Heigl Midriff Sports Bra Yoga Pants
    Dry Water
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks pretty good (except face). Probably trying to get back in the business. Maybe her mind cought up with her horse’s ass of a mouth and realized ditching a top TV series wasn’t such a good idea.

  30. Jada Pinkett Smith Tramp Stamp Backless Dress MIBIII
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    “Why yes, Will and I do swing, but your not our type.”

  31. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    browny
    Commented on this photo:

    SHOW US YOUR TITS, SIMON. COME ON, we’ve all seen your manboobs… c’mon

  32. Rita Ora Panty Flash Upskirt
    Whyask
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll bet I’m not the only person disappointed in Rita Ora’s crotch tonight.

  33. Rita Ora Panty Flash Upskirt
    Commented on this photo:

    My God, it’s Courtney Stodden’s mentor!

  34. Maria Menounos Bruises Legs Minidress
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Must have got it while she was heels over head.

  35. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Dat no ass.

  36. Anthony Kiedis Everly Bear Scooter
    Commented on this photo:

    “Team leader to Raven…as soon as he gets the kid into the car, open fire!”

  37. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Cleavage
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    That bikini would look hot on a hot girl.

  38. Holly Henderson Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, Lady, jump up and down a few times. I think I see my car keys.”

  39. Ryan Phillipe
    Commented on this photo:

    Imaginably banging imaginary sheep.

  40. Dominique Storelli Bikini
    Psycobiff
    Commented on this photo:

    Something tells me this chick would take it in the ass for a bottle of Grey Goose with a sparkler on it.

  41. Jaime Pressly Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    Commented on this photo:

    How fun it must have been getting her pregnant!

  42. Pauly D
    Commented on this photo:

    “OK, Pauly, now put the mic in your mouth, take off your shoes, and step into the puddle on the concrete floor…”

  43. Jennifer Love Hewitt Cellulite Legs
    Commented on this photo:

    I would be willing to rub out the dings in her legs.

  44. Big Sean Sagging Pants Crotch Grab
    Commented on this photo:

    No fucking wonder — he’s in fucking Carson in So. California. All 142 people who showed up are potential homies.

  45. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    I believe there are several sodomy and obscenity laws and ordinances that I would really enjoy violating with this woman.

  46. Val Kilmer
    Commented on this photo:

    Unfortunately some of Val’s fleas jumped onto that shapely woman’s legs and bit her shins all to hell.

  47. Jay-Z
    sgth
    Commented on this photo:

    could he be any uglier?

  48. Ian Somerhalder Nina Dobrev Legs Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    I just love that little space on her inner left thigh between her shorts and her skin…that’s where I’d like to sneak in a few fingers and a tongue. No, not all at the same time…sheesh!

  49. Brooke Shields
    Commented on this photo:

    “As a special surprise for Brooke we have flown in, at great expense, her old pal TOM CRUISE…c’mon out, Tom!”

  50. Katherine Heigl Midriff Sports Bra Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, Kate, when you get home you and I are going to fill up your belly button with the precious bodily fluid of your choice.

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