The Crap We Missed – Monday 5.14.12

May 14th, 2012 // 683 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed which is bursting at the seams from a weekend full of hidden paparazzi gems. Gems like Goldie Hawn‘s timeless beauty, which applies to Brooke Shields as well. Big black microphones start to look small in Serena Williams‘ hands, Ryan Phillipe‘s dick becomes a divining rod, Simon Cowell gives side boob a shot, and Jeremy Renner hits up the Lakers game with Travolta‘s masseuse.

Remember when James Franco played James Dean? Because James Franco really wants you to remember when he played James Dean,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. James Franco Rebel Mural
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Rebel, without a clue.

  2. James Franco Rebel Mural
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh he’s a rebel alright. He doesn’t play by societies rules. Laws be dammed!

  3. Eva Longoria Butt Ass Jeans
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder if she’ll have any trouble getting a cab.

  4. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder what would happen if I walked around like that. Like it was the fucking 70s with my shirt unbuttoned to my navel. I’ll tell you what…lot’s of pussy!

  5. Jay-Z
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    “H to the izz-O, V to the fake pregnancy! Oops, y’all didn’t hear that, okay?”

  6. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Did she win the Most Unlikely Dildo Award?

  7. Jeremy Renner Penny Marshall
    Commented on this photo:

    His boyfriend is even making the BJ sign with his mouth. Way to keep it in the closet Jeremy!

  8. Jeremy Renner Penny Marshall
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Hang on their sweetie, I got to get my smokes.

  9. Ryan Phillipe
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    I think I know where the second purple thermos disappeared to.

  10. Dominique Storelli Bikini
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    At a certain point, why even bother with the pretension of clothing?

  11. Jaime Pressly Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mommy, how come daddy keeps calling me Oedipus Junior?”

  12. Jay-Z
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Stop laughing at me, mom!

  13. Dominique Storelli Bikini
    Cardinal Fang
    Commented on this photo:

    This is the answer for erectile disfunction. No need for pills.

  14. Jaime Pressly Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    Commented on this photo:

    That kid is gonna have a lot of friends.

  15. she is soo hot !

  16. Cristiano Ronaldo Feeds Irina Shayk Chocolate
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m pretty sure that any food from a guy with that haircut is going to have a roofie in it.

  17. Jay-Z
    KungFu Panda
    Commented on this photo:

    If I was a Kardashian, you wouldn’t see this mic.

  18. Pauly D
    Commented on this photo:

    So you’re saying to be a DJ, I have to put these headphones around my neck all askew and press this play button?

  19. James Franco Rebel Mural
    Commented on this photo:

    Please let that paint be his actual blood he used in a coke binge…

  20. Rita Ora Panty Flash Upskirt
    KungFu Panda
    Commented on this photo:

    I see London, I see France, I see Rita’s underpants!

  21. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    Commented on this photo:

    Black microphone and this statue? You call this a challenge?!?!?!? BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  22. Big Sean Sagging Pants Crotch Grab
    Commented on this photo:

    So you’re saying to be a rapper, I just have to put my brand new hat on backwards and pull my pants down while holding my penis?

  23. Rita Ora Panty Flash Upskirt
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s the British Lindsay. She’s only going to do 6 episodes a season instead of 20, will have a much smaller budget, and will probably feature a bunch of BBC regulars.

  24. Jay-Z
    Commented on this photo:

    That is a straight up challenge to Kanye…

  25. Val Kilmer
    Commented on this photo:

    YES! What a bloated fucking freak he is! And his hair is like hay. Just sticking out in all directions. Awesome!

  26. Anthony Kiedis Everly Bear Scooter
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    And you were embarrassed by YOUR dad.

  27. Ryan Phillipe
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he waiting for Beckham to show up?

  28. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    bbiowa
    Commented on this photo:

    Ribbed for her pleasure.

  29. Ryan Phillipe
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s keeping on his toes in case someone offers him a movie role.

  30. Ian Somerhalder Nina Dobrev Legs Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    Hmmm. Wonder what I’ll wear today…

    Oh I know. This stupid fucking hat and v neck tee that I wear every fucking other day.

  31. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    Commented on this photo:

    “HAHAHA! A white microphone! It’s funny because it’s true”.

  32. Big Sean Sagging Pants Crotch Grab
    Commented on this photo:

    Big Sean is performing R. Kelly covers, now?

  33. Jeremy Renner Penny Marshall
    Commented on this photo:

    Now is the time on Sprockettes when we sit.

  34. Brooke Shields
    Commented on this photo:

    Just imagine the sound a screech owl makes while looking at this picture.

  35. Jaime Pressly Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Imagine when he tells his kindergarten class “My mommy plays white trash for a living.”

  36. Jay-Z
    ComedySilliness
    Commented on this photo:

    Somewhere in these pics there’s always a black guy saying it with his eyes and a big black microphone … wait .. sorry – mixed memes for a second

  37. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Reached behind his seat and snatched a Kool from the pack.

  38. Cristiano Ronaldo Feeds Irina Shayk Chocolate
    bbiowa
    Commented on this photo:

    If he really cared he would have chewed it first.

  39. Simon Cowell Chest Hair Man Boobs Open Shirt
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    For anyone feeling a little oversexed right now….a little hot n bothered with no relief in sight, just take a peek down the shirt. You’ll cool right down.

  40. Brooke Shields
    KungFu Panda
    Commented on this photo:

    Reporter: “Brooke, who are you wearing?”
    Brooke: “Depends.”

  41. Katherine Heigl Midriff Sports Bra Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s probably just bouncing along and whistling a happy little tune. Such a happy gal.

  42. Aubrey O'Day Cleavage
    Me
    Commented on this photo:

    What a boob. (Take that as you will.)

  43. Goldie Hawn Nipples No Bra Yoga Pants
    Razdrazsharp
    Commented on this photo:

    Upon seeing those man boobs I initially thought this was another shot of Val Kilmer…

    • USDA Prime McBeef

      i honestly thought that was Kristen Dunst. but the tits are obviously not hers. i won’t even be that mean.

  44. Pauly D
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Uh, idn’t there supposed to be an audience?

  45. Deena Cortese Butt Legs Tight Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh god.

  46. Ryan Phillipe
    Commented on this photo:

    Invisible Shetland pony.

  47. Val Kilmer
    Commented on this photo:

    I have not yet begun to defile myself.

  48. James Franco Rebel Mural
    metoo
    Commented on this photo:

    His next role is Charles Manson: The Emo…

  49. Jennifer Love Hewitt Cellulite Legs
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Just act natural…no one knows about the guy locked in the basement.

  50. Serena Williams Trophy Madrid Open
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    If that doesn’t scratch the itch nothing will.

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