The Crap We Missed – Monday 3.25.13

March 25th, 2013 // 534 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed which I hope you still have some gas in the tank for after justifiably going nuts over this Kim Kardashian post. I mean I don’t want this site to just turn into undignified shots of motherhood. That would be completely despicable. Instead let’s turn our attention to worthy targets like Criss Angel, who apparently has the magical ability to travel back in time to be my hair dresser in the 7th grade who made us pick styles out of an ‘Impressions’ catalog. Then there’s 50 Cent being shown a picture of what Chelsea Handler looks like if you have absolutely no drugs in your system, Patrick Schwarzenegger letting the grope flow through him, and finally, as if Hell wasn’t awful enough, now everyone there is going to have itchy junk.

Jackson Galaxy, today you are my Prince Charles,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Valerie Perrine Cleavage Yellow Teeth Genesis Awards Benefit Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    why…why would you do this to us?

  2. Valerie Perrine Cleavage Yellow Teeth Genesis Awards Benefit Gala
    Jentilly
    Commented on this photo:

    I want to make fun but she’s really kind of sad looking

  3. Melanie Griffith Antonio Banderas Balcony
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    “You’re married to who?”

  4. Melanie Griffith Antonio Banderas Balcony
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    You can only avoid looking at your wife during daylight for so long.

    BTW, I would NOT recommend looking at her in the direct vicinity of a balcony.

  5. Kevin Federline Fat High Tops Son Sean Preston Soccer Game
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Dad, why are you wearing my sneakers?”

  6. Kevin Federline Fat High Tops Son Sean Preston Soccer Game
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yo Kevin, what do you do for a living again?”

  7. Ben Affleck Jennifer Garner Bending Over
    ash
    Commented on this photo:

    tag on the stroller?

  8. Vida Guerra Butt Yoga Pants
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Kardashian lite.

  9. Jackson Galaxy The Humane Societys 2013 Genesis Awards Benefit Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    all that time spent on bad facial hair decisions…no time for crest white strips.

  10. Valerie Perrine Cleavage Yellow Teeth Genesis Awards Benefit Gala
    BbyBluThghHghs
    Commented on this photo:

    WHAT is THAT?!

  11. Paula Deen Excited LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    Lets get this out of the way….. “butter y’all!”

  12. Helen Mirren Empire Film Awards
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    I would happily bang Helen Mirren over at least 5 of the women in this group of pictures.

  13. 50 Cent All Things Fall Apart Premiere After Party
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s his reaction to the previous picture.

  14. Helen Mirren Empire Film Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    All of the really prestigious awards have a liquor brand on them.

  15. Nicole Kidman Omega Ladymatic Watches Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    Oops.. Time for another injection, Nicole’s face is starting show signs of life

  16. Ashley Sky Underwear Terry Richardson
    Commented on this photo:

    Black and white photos of a chick who looks like she thinks she’s making a terrible mistake? Must be a Terry Richardson session.

  17. Patrick Schwarzenegger Groping Woman
    Commented on this photo:

    “I swear this has NEVER happened before”

  18. Valerie Perrine Cleavage Yellow Teeth Genesis Awards Benefit Gala
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Honey, I can tell you’re a man. Nice try, though.” – RuPaul

  19. Daniel Radcliffe Empire Film Awards
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    “Pip pip and cheerio lads” which I believe is the new code for “yes I am light in the loafers”.

  20. June Shannon Eating Subway Drinking Mountain Dew
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that a Diet Dew?

  21. Crystal Hefner Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    She and Elin Nordegren are in competition for the biggest gold digger. Elin is currently in the lead, but never count out a fighter like Crystal. She can whore with the best of them.

  22. Verne Troyer Tuxedo Muhammad Ali Celebrity Fight Night XIX
    Commented on this photo:

    Phew – good thing he monogrammed his shirts.
    There was a huge confusion last time at the dry cleaners when he didnt.

  23. Pamela Anderson Devil Guy Cirque Performer One Night For One Drop Charity Event
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Between the devil and the Hep C

  24. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Pregnant Belly
    Commented on this photo:

    i try not to slam pregnant ladies’ bodies because it’s fucking ridiculous, but I’m sort of just amazed by this. At nine months, she is going to be something to behold.

  25. Julie Bowen Swinging Kid Around
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    “As punishment you will smell mommy’s farts for an hour young man!”

  26. Andy Dick DWTS Practice
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Gawd, I don’t understand why people think I’m gay!”
    *sucks on microphone*
    “Seriously, what are people seeing?”
    *cradles invisible balls*
    “It’s so annoying! I wish I knew how to make it stop!”
    *shoves microphone up his ass*

  27. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Butt Tight Jeans Jason Statham
    Commented on this photo:

    “I am NOT going into the store with a bunny and an Easter egg hanging in the window. I don’t care WHAT they’re selling”

  28. Criss Angel Little Boy Haircut One Night For One Drop Charity Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Geared up for the return of Fallout Boy

  29. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Pregnant Belly
    Commented on this photo:

    MooooooooOOoooooo.

  30. Mickey Rourke Red Hair Bicep Bandage
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s a creepy jumble of male/female/cartoon body parts and accessories.

  31. Melanie Griffith Antonio Banderas Balcony
    Matty
    Commented on this photo:

    Laser eye surgery?

  32. Valerie Perrine Cleavage Yellow Teeth Genesis Awards Benefit Gala
    The Pope
    Commented on this photo:

    Lindsay is out of rehab already?

  33. Naike Rivelli Nipples American Flag Outfit Brunswick Bowling 50th Anniversary Event
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Red, White, and Bolt-ons. God bless the USA!

  34. Paula Deen Excited LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey y’all!! They were right! Look what happened when I stopped eating that crap I convinced other people to make and eat.”

  35. Naike Rivelli Nipples American Flag Outfit Brunswick Bowling 50th Anniversary Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Kinda hot, until you work your way south down to those creepy man-hands.

  36. Ben Affleck Jennifer Garner Bending Over
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s been trying to convince her to try anal for years now. She’s just torturing him, dangling it in front of him.

  37. Kevin Federline Fat High Tops Son Sean Preston Soccer Game
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    - Dad, we’re down two points. Any suggestions?
    - Start with the jelly donuts. Remember, small sips of the milkshake or it fills you up too quickly… Did you know you can use donuts to keep score?

  38. Kevin Federline Fat High Tops Son Sean Preston Soccer Game
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait. They make clothes big enough to be over-sized and baggy on THAT? We’ve failed as a nation.

  39. Valerie Perrine Cleavage Yellow Teeth Genesis Awards Benefit Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    Shit is that seriously her??
    I had a huge crush on her back in the Superman days.

  40. Daniel Radcliffe Empire Film Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    “Take THAT Martin Short. I AM the new Ed Grimley”

  41. Ian Somerhalder Sipping Drink Built Of Barnwood
    Commented on this photo:

    “I thought this was lemonade”

  42. Melanie Griffith Antonio Banderas Balcony
    Commented on this photo:

    “We’ve got a few hours open this afternoon Antonio – wanna try out that new experimental plastic surgery college? You can get free facial work from the students!”

  43. Hayden Panettiere Wladimir Klitschko Miami Heat Game
    Commented on this photo:

    “If I lie on my back and you stand over me, my dick can reach up to your chin.”

    “Yeah, I love that.”

  44. Ben Affleck Jennifer Garner Bending Over
    Commented on this photo:

    Hold still honey, I’m going to attempt a reverse Argofuckyourself.

  45. Pamela Anderson Devil Guy Cirque Performer One Night For One Drop Charity Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Pam is very familiar with horny devils.

  46. Patrick Schwarzenegger Groping Woman
    sc4play
    Commented on this photo:

    Stand back…….I don’t know how big this thing gets!!!

  47. Melanie Griffith Antonio Banderas Balcony
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “If you divorced me, Antonio, I’d throw myself off this balcony right now.”
    “Wow! I was gonna push you, but . . .”

  48. Valerie Perrine Cleavage Yellow Teeth Genesis Awards Benefit Gala
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Meh who cares. We will always have pics and films of her in all of her young glory.

  49. Hayden Panettiere Wladimir Klitschko Miami Heat Game
    Commented on this photo:

    She is wearing 25″ heels.

  50. June Shannon Eating Subway Drinking Mountain Dew
    Commented on this photo:

    Just a small snack, waiting in line at the Golden Corral.

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