The Crap We Missed – Monday 3.10.14

March 10th, 2014 // 475 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed where I’ve been accused of shattering illusions about beloved TV shows (Just admit it, Fish, Cohle blew God so, so hard.) so I embraced it by leading off with Flynn White post coke-rape. While you’re trying not to think about Uncle Terry shouting “Call me Wendy!” at the moment of climax (Welcome to Carcosa, fuckers.), check out Kellan Lutz and The Woody Allen Dream Team, Tom Arnold going full Tom Arnold and Tyrese Gibson who knows he’s going to have to share those leftover southwest eggrolls goddamnit, if she wanted some, why didn’t she just order her own?

What was darker, the gleeful references to sexual assault or the projection of deep relationship resentments onto what was probably an innocent photo? Discuss,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Jonah Hill Douchy Clothes Douchy Friend
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    “I heard you’ve been kissing Leo’s ass…”
    “Are you kidding me? He’s the one that’s been all over me! You fool!”

  2. Sarah Jessica Parker Excited Shoe Line Launch Nordstroms
    Commented on this photo:

    Happy as a Shetland in the Edelweiss.

  3. Daryl Hannah LAX
    Helena Handbasket
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she still living in a tree?

  4. Pamela Anderson Panty Flash Upskirt
    jep
    Commented on this photo:

    They let her walk around unattended in Malibu?

  5. Robin Thicke Talking To Female Fan
    Commented on this photo:

    Still an improvement over Miley

  6. Lea Michele Crazy Face Album Signing The Grove
    Commented on this photo:

    Remember the creepy salt creature from Star Trek?

    Yeah …

  7. Aubrey ODay Butt Bikini Playing Chicken Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude! Her snatch ate that guy’s head. Save yourself!!!!!

  8. Mickey Rourke Shirtless Under Vest Drinking Coke Tattoo Parlor
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    Tell Bill I said have a Coke and a smile and shut the fuck up!

  9. Laurence Fishburne LAX
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    That bodyguard’s special weapon? Smothering with mammary goodness.

  10. Sarah Jessica Parker Excited Shoe Line Launch Nordstroms
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know Nordstrom’s carried horseshoes.

  11. Jonah Hill Douchy Clothes Douchy Friend
    jep
    Commented on this photo:

    Muffin top!!!!!

  12. Tyrese Gibson Sadface Hoodie Carrying Chilis Leftovers
    Commented on this photo:

    Dammit. I TOLD them no onions. Now I gotta pick ‘em out of my lunch for tomorrow!

  13. Daryl Hannah LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    Splat.

  14. Olivier Martinez Holding Giant Baguette Riding Motorcycle
    Commented on this photo:

    Nothing says badass like a baguette.

  15. Teri Hatcher Cameltoe Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Nope, not even a 10 foot pole.

  16. Teri Hatcher Cameltoe Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone get Martinez back here with that baguette. STAT!

  17. Daryl Hannah LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s like Kim Bassinger. Hot from one specific angle. Otherwise, a trainwreck!

  18. Sarah Jessica Parker Excited Shoe Line Launch Nordstroms
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    If any of those Nordstroms are in malls, she’s gonna face some tough competition from Fetlocker.

  19. Olivia Munn Guy Dropping Pictures In Front Of Her LAX
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    Leaving her headshots out just anywhere, this ho is getting really desperate.

    Even Abercrombie Steve is trying to give them back.

  20. Anastasia Ashley Butt Bikini Instagram
    MFer
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like she just got done taking a piss in the bushes.

  21. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Bikini Instagram
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    # of combined STDs in this photo?

  22. Mel Gibson Crazy Eyes Full Scruffy Beard Rehab Facility
    MFer
    Commented on this photo:

    And he, a crap on the concrete.

  23. Marysol Patton Nipples See Through Wet Shirt
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought ducks hung out by lakes not oceans…

  24. Olivier Martinez Holding Giant Baguette Riding Motorcycle
    coljack
    Commented on this photo:

    “Of courze, you can hev my baguette…just az zoon az you pry it from my cold, daid handz.”

  25. Robin Thicke Talking To Female Fan
    Senor Trout
    Commented on this photo:

    Robin had a very particular taste to satisfy when looking for a rebound chick: a woman who looked like Peter Griffin when he got super buff in that one episode of Family Guy.

    Mission accomplished.

  26. RJ Mitte Terry Richardson
    Commented on this photo:

    i just realized where I know RJ Mitte from, i didn’t recognize him not eating breakfast.

  27. Lea Michele Crazy Face Album Signing The Grove
    Commented on this photo:

    Jesus Christ, how big is that forehead that she is always hiding with those huge bangs?

  28. Olivier Martinez Holding Giant Baguette Riding Motorcycle
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Things just aren’t the same since Halle had the kid.

  29. Maitland Ward Cleavage Legs Spandex Minidress Joyce Giraud 7th Style Fashion Week LA
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    That Maitland woman usually smiles like a maniac for any camera.
    Something must be terribly wrong.

    • No, no. That’s just her giving me her smoldering bedroom eyes. Or picturing the nightmare of actually being in the bedroom with me.

      Yeah, looking at the picture again, it’s definitely the latter.

  30. Laurence Fishburne LAX
    Marthy
    Commented on this photo:

    Red Pill.

  31. RJ Mitte Terry Richardson
    Commented on this photo:

    Pedo Ter.

  32. Danny Trejo Best Friends Animal Society Pet Rescue Poster
    Commented on this photo:

    I saved my best friends, too. I didn’t send them a link to this picture.

  33. Danny Trejo Best Friends Animal Society Pet Rescue Poster
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    Sometimes a pimp just needs to show off his bitches

  34. Pamela Anderson Panty Flash Upskirt
    Commented on this photo:

    I presume her husband is just out of frame, since she always seems to be walking six steps behind him.

  35. Kellan Lutz Posing With Young Thai Girls Nikki Beach Phuket Grand Opening Celebration
    Commented on this photo:

    See, its tricky. I doubt any of them are a day younger than 50. Damn asians just don’t age like we do.

  36. AnnaLynne McCord Thong Sticking Out Of Jeans Belly Crop Top
    Commented on this photo:

    She seems to be successfully supporting only one of those three pieces of outerwear.

  37. Tom Arnold Derpface Supermensch Premire SXSW Music Film Interactive Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess The Price is Right gig really takes it out of a guy.

  38. Lea Michele Crazy Face Album Signing The Grove
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Maybe if you put “I’m still sad because my boyfriend is still dead”
    on the marquee, someone would have showed up for this thing.

  39. Robin Thicke Talking To Female Fan
    Commented on this photo:

    OK now she was gross, she tried to squeeze you
    But you’re an asshole, sonny, it’s in your nature
    “Just let me lubricate you
    Hey, hey, hey – (she said)
    You don’t need no rubber
    Hey, hey, hey”- (she said)
    Blurred Lines! I know you’re a fattie. But I’m really Horny!

  40. Lea Michele Crazy Face Album Signing The Grove
    Commented on this photo:

    i WANT a FUCKING Caramel Machioto NOW, or someone is going to have an ‘accident’ and be found tomorrow in a hotel room! Comprende Consuela??!

  41. Tyrese Gibson Sadface Hoodie Carrying Chilis Leftovers
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Nothing says “I’m a thug” like carrying your girlfriends left
    over house salad in a take home tray.

  42. Kellan Lutz Posing With Young Thai Girls Nikki Beach Phuket Grand Opening Celebration
    Commented on this photo:

    And the bidding will start at 100 baht. Do I hear 150?

  43. Victoria Silvstedt Bikini Looking Down Into Crotch
    Commented on this photo:

    OM NOM NOM. Or, “Feed me, Seymour, feed me all night long!” Or, “We’re gonna need a bigger boat.” Something like that.

  44. Mel Gibson Crazy Eyes Full Scruffy Beard Rehab Facility
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait, hold on, gotta call you back. I think I just spotted a Jew.

  45. Sarah Jessica Parker Excited Shoe Line Launch Nordstroms
    Commented on this photo:

    Excuse me, these shoes won’t stay on my feet.

    Sorry, ma’am, that’s because we haven’t nailed them yet.

  46. Mickey Rourke Shirtless Under Vest Drinking Coke Tattoo Parlor
    Commented on this photo:

    Tonight on “Who Wants to Be a Chippendale?”, Choate vs. Middlesex.

  47. Sarah Jessica Parker Excited Shoe Line Launch Nordstroms
    david(guest)
    Commented on this photo:

    not even with your dick…

  48. Robin Thicke Talking To Female Fan
    Commented on this photo:

    Robin, Robin, wait right there and hold still. And catch my legs also. Oh, and hold my phone. But don’t drop it when you catch my legs. Okay, so anyway, check out my twerk.

  49. Gerard Butler Wearing Eye Makeup
    Commented on this photo:

    Mmmmm, Sparta.

  50. Steven Tyler Helmet Goggles Straddling Motorcycle
    Commented on this photo:

    Poot.

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