Toldcha Bieber Smurfed that.
Welcome to another exciting edition of The Crap We Missed. Thrill at the sight of Christina Aguilera being seconds away from telling Matthew Rutler to “mole her!” Marvel at Samantha Ronson’s new girlfriend who may or may not be Rashida Jones! And be astounded by the other-worldly crime-fighting skills of the Los Angeles Police Department!
All this.. and Paris Hilton contemplating eating food. GASP!
- The Superficial
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Photos: Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Too early for flapjacks?
I doubt Rashida Jones went lesbian on us considering she used to bang Sam’s brother Mark….that would also be really awkward
Personally, I think it is Ali Lohan dressed to look like Rashida….Sam can’t let Lindsay know she is actually sleeping with her younger sister, now that Linds is headed for jail! Hey, at least she is keeping it in the family!
“Does this side make me look like a fame whore?”
“If I stand just so, does it hide how much like Kim Kardashian’s, my ass really looks?”
The guy kissing Christina is playing Russian roulette because a woman who spends as much time completely shitfaced as she does could puke at any second.
This is a clear betrayal of the unspoken “masturbater/masturbatee” contract we had, Ms. Knightly.
She isn’t eating it….the missing bite was taken by her “food tester” to make sure it wasn’t poisoned. She can’t even pose pretending to eat something, if it has been poisoned!
“Now, I know my profession consists entirely of me grabbing other men, and now I’m on a dancing show, and, yes, I’m going to Perez Hilton’s birthday party in this cute shiny vest that totally matches my shirt’s cuffs, but I’m here with a hot woman. Totally straight.”
Hot woman???? Zero tits, none, nada, zip, zilcho, not a single sign of where they should be. She’s kinda cute in the face.
why is she so sad, it should be the guy who should be.
That’s one of the best tuck jobs I’ve ever seen.
Wow, Big Daddy Kane hasn’t aged a bit.
They’re not kissing, she drank the last beer in the mini-fridge and he’s trying to get it back.
EWWW! Not as gross as the photo, though!
“I was eating it, but then we went somewhere where it was bright and I saw that it was made by a black and made an excuse and left. I can’t stand sandwiches made by black guys. I would never touch one. It’s gross. (pauses). Does that guy look black to you?”
She has to wear the label so everyone will believe she is trash, not just a trash wannabe!
Is she slumping so her hair looks longer?
Oh, look, the whores come with little heart labels now. Like beanie babies.
“And you can take that to the bank”
He keeps trying to give blood, but all they can draw is vinegar and water.
Sarah Connor?
There’s a car seat in the back for LiLo. Who needs kids when you have trainwreck next-door exes?
Hey look, its Julia Stiles’ frumpy twin sister Leotta.
You could make the caption “Paris Hilton eating meat” only no one would bother looking.
+1
Your roots are showing. So is your bra strap. Oh, also your deep seated resentment for your father.
Looks like she prematurely blue herself.
Says a lot about the lass that the first thing I thought was ‘no shit stain on the skirt. Good for her!’
Too bad she’s not running while she’s eating it.
What, Josh Duhamel has tiger blood now too?
If you have to advertise what a bitch/slut/whore you are, you may be suffering from Avril Lavigne Syndrome. Check with your doctor.
Pretty much, there’s owning a persona and just being a moron about it. “so trash” she might as well throw her blocks in a fit.
How can somebody so hot can be so boring?
McLovin !
She looks like shit, and she is yesterdays news.
Keira,you should clean yourself up next time after you flap off.
Daria has finally came out of the closet.
Hahaha!!!!!
Rashida has been friends with the whole Ronson family for years and years and she was engaged to Mark. She is so not Samantha’s girlfriend!
talk about jumping to conclusions. two women are riding in the same car so now they are dating? so stupid
You realize you’re scolding a guy who writes for a site called “The Superficial,” right?
This costume seems out of place until you consider that Perez went as Ruby Rhod and Justin Bieber as Leeloo.
Pippi Longstocking: The Prostitute Years
When did Glad start making sequined trash bags?
Those legs are smoother than Irina Shayk’s.
Those legs are smoother than Fergie’s!
I haven’t seen such a profound lack of ass since that one round of Kesha pictures. I’m misquoting someone here, but it looks like some stood a frog up on its hind legs.
Please, NO. Don’t encourage more Ke$ha photos.
“See that bird over there? Shagged her. And that one there? Shagged her. And that one? Didn’t shag her yet. But that one over there? Totally shagged her.”
Where’s McNulty?
Even the sunglasses look like they have a third chromosome.
hilarious.
you read my mind
She’s like the Marcie to Ronson’s Peppermint Patty.
I would give Rashida Jones a cat bath.
little girl blue. she needed the money–OH!!
I doubt Perez has anywhere near as much a Selena does money wise, I think she was there on behalf of her boyfriend who is in Europe and couldn’t attend… and she is wearing his costume !
It seems like he’s using the Red Power Ranger as a living mirror…
Obviously staged for the camera. Why else would be covering her extra chins?
That’s the smile of someone thinking, “Come on and snap it already, I gotta take a dump!”
Is it snowing? Oh, that must be cocaine on the lens.
He should punt.