The Crap We Missed – Monday 3.28.11

March 28th, 2011 // 357 Comments

Toldcha Bieber Smurfed that.

Welcome to another exciting edition of The Crap We Missed. Thrill at the sight of Christina Aguilera being seconds away from telling Matthew Rutler to “mole her!” Marvel at Samantha Ronson’s new girlfriend who may or may not be Rashida Jones! And be astounded by the other-worldly crime-fighting skills of the Los Angeles Police Department!

All this.. and Paris Hilton contemplating eating food. GASP!

- The Superficial

Click Here to Start the Gallery

Photos: Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Selena Gomez
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Read who the party was thrown for & it makes a little more sense.

  2. Selena Gomez
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    So Canadian semen really *is* blue…huh.

  3. Christina Aguilera Matthew Rutler
    tits
    Commented on this photo:

    look at that poor driver’s face.

  4. Jude Law
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    The first and last time Jude Law will ever be referred to as leaving “The Box.”

  5. Josh Duhamel
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s married to Fergie, so he’s no stranger to public weirdness in behavior & garb.

  6. Selena Gomez
    Commented on this photo:

    THIS is what pesci meant by “funny like a clown”

  7. Josh Duhamel
    IRockSoxOff
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is he hanging out with the Black Eyed Peas without Fergie?

  8. Jude Law
    Commented on this photo:

    dude you look like stallone, and i don’t mean in a cool way

  9. Josh Duhamel
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    Josh Duhamel teaches the Power Rangers the technique he uses to fend off Fergie’s sexual advances.

    • felix

      “Back, I say!! My ass is just now healed up enough to where I don’t walk around shitting my pants involuntarily. On guard!”

  10. Christina Aguilera Matthew Rutler
    LeelaGoLucky
    Commented on this photo:

    The precise moment the smell from their open mouths wafted to the front of the car

  11. Olivia Munn Comedy Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    wow she looks… FEMININE! impressive..

  12. Christina Aguilera Matthew Rutler
    Jess
    Commented on this photo:

    “please stop”

  13. Charlie Sheen
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s cocaine that you see flying around in the air.
    Charlie provided the distraction while his sobriety coach threw the 80 kilos out the turret window.
    Winning!

  14. Charlie Sheen
    Ed
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve seen cops fired for less . . .

  15. Charlie Sheen
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    Apparently this photo was taken in the blast radius of one of Charlie’s seven-gram rocks.

  16. Selena Gomez
    john
    Commented on this photo:

    I love her no matter what she wears or what color her hair is.

  17. Lindsay Lohan
    Jon Hex
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh man, I did not expect Lindsay was meant to be her new hooker name.

  18. Selena Gomez
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought Perez Hilton was universally reviled by celebrities because he posts pics of their kids on his blog and draws penises on their faces? Why are they celebrating him instead of giving him the vicious sack beating he so richly deserves?

  19. Keira Knightley
    Ed
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s her Wednesday Adams impression.

  20. Kim Kardashian Kris Humphries
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    Fun fact: his jeans are actually tight on Kim.

  21. Lindsay Lohan
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Swiss shepherdess braids plus African influence print plus no pants….she must be on her way to court again.

  22. Samantha Ronson
    LA0811
    Commented on this photo:

    Rashida Jones used to be engaged to Mark Ronson. That’s her, but she’s probably not Samantha’s gf.

  23. Kim Kardashian Kris Humphries
    Jon Hex
    Commented on this photo:

    Boyfriend? That guy’s black?

  24. Christina Aguilera Matthew Rutler
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    Suddenly the disaster in Japan doesn’t seem so bad.

  25. Christina Aguilera Matthew Rutler
    Jon Hex
    Commented on this photo:

    He was about to say “Get a room” until he realized he was driving them there.

  26. Kim Kardashian Kris Humphries
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Make a sex tape with him & immediately release it.

  27. Vivian

    I don’t get it. Is it like a costume or.. not..

  28. Christina Aguilera Matthew Rutler
    Commented on this photo:

    too bad it’s not henri paul driving..

  29. Kendra Wilkinson
    Anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m pretty sure your ankle isn’t suppose to be the same diameter as your thigh.

  30. Christina Aguilera Matthew Rutler
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Everyone’s job sucks.

  31. Keira Knightley
    Jon Hex
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like a rags to riches before picture.

  32. Michelle Hunziker
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait. Wait, wait, wait. If you ever…EVER…post a photo of a model at the beach wearing JEANS again, I will sue you in federal court. That’s a borderline hate crime.

  33. Keira Knightley
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugh she dresses like an olsen twin. so much for that sexy ass video on the bike the other day

  34. Keira Knightley
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I was made to wear this dress but you can’t make me stand up straight or comb my hair.

  35. Fergie
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuggie

  36. Christina Aguilera Matthew Rutler
    Anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is he leaning into frame?

    • huh?

      He is being subjected to an utterly revolting display, and you think he’s worried about the fucking paps?

  37. Paris Hilton
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    Wasn’t “Paris Hilton Eating a Fatburger” the sequel to “One Night in Paris?”

  38. ThisisnotTigerWoods

    I’d hit it.

  39. Chris Jericho
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I have no idea who he is but the blogger has provided me reasons to hate him immediately.

  40. Taylor Momsen
    Ed
    Commented on this photo:

    At least get her face in the picture. Have some respect for your craft you no good scum sucking pap.

  41. Taylor Momsen
    Josephus
    Commented on this photo:

    The drummer knows that if he makes eye contact, he’s going to prison.

  42. Keira Knightley
    Anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like an embarrassed 12 year old boy that was forced to wear his sister’s dress and get his picture taken.

  43. Michelle Hunziker
    Commented on this photo:

    do like skinny girls too but that lighting makes her look emaciated

  44. Fergie
    Anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    When I shut my eyes I’m invisible to everyone around me.

  45. Christina Aguilera Matthew Rutler
    Dr. Hufurrrrr
    Commented on this photo:

    …and it was at that precise moment that Armando realized that his life, did in fact, suck out loud.

  46. Chris Jericho
    Commented on this photo:

    no idea who the dude is but that chick looks hot, is she that cross eyed one from the other day? lookin mighty fine here

  47. Taylor Momsen
    Commented on this photo:

    drummer looks like stuttering john

  48. Paris Hilton
    Anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    I see you Billy Connolly.

  49. Taylor Momsen
    Anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    Babyyyy ruuuuth?!

  50. Olivia Munn Comedy Awards
    Snooki's Taint
    Commented on this photo:

    She was there studying the craft, so next time she shows up on The Daily Show, she might actually be funny. Save your breath honey and our time. Women, and lawyers aren’t funny. Take off your top.

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