The Crap We Missed – Monday 2.3.14

February 3rd, 2014 // 528 Comments

Don’t even act like you don’t know who that is.

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed where I’ll just shoot it to you guys straight. It’s snowing like a motherfucker here and that puts me in a mood most foul, so instead of trying to make this post seem more interesting than a goddamn flaming-hammer-of-justice wielding ambulance chaser I’ll just go ahead and lower that bar. There’s Dexter spitting in the general direction of the paparazzi – SCANDAL!, David Hasselhoff driving what must be one of those french fry grease powered cars, and Woody Allen who’s apparently allowed to bring his own treats into sporting events.

What? Oh, I crossed the line? My apologies, he’s real stand-up dude, I shouldn’t have,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. April Rose Cleavage Maxim Big Game Weekend Super Bowl Party
    Commented on this photo:

    If Danika Patrick was a girl…

  2. Heather Locklear No Makeup
    Son of Flubber
    Commented on this photo:

    My 80′s boner just died.

  3. Kylie Jenner Legs Slit Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    She has such good taste in men. First Jaden Smith now this guy. He looks like a gay Jonathan Rhys Meyers.

  4. Michael C Hall Spitting At Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    hahahaha

  5. Ireland Baldwin Butt Yoga Pants Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Thought it was Coco. My bad. (Or hers?)

  6. Ireland Baldwin Butt Yoga Pants Instagram
    Butt Plugger
    Commented on this photo:

    I would definitely tongue punch her dirt star from that position

  7. Nina Agdal Butt Yoga Pants DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Son of Flubber
    Commented on this photo:

    I wanna declare Jihad on her lady parts.

  8. Chrissy Teigen Cleavage Boob Window Dress SHAPE And Mens Fitness Super Bowl Concert Dinner Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Beautiful woman.

  9. Ashton Kutcher Mila Kunis Pregnant Fat Face Weight Gain
    Commented on this photo:

    That shirt: Knocked up or “bad angle”?

  10. Jennifer Tilly Cleavage Holding Alex Trebeks Hand 2014 Writers Guild Awards Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    Trebek knows a sure thing when he sees it.

  11. April Rose Cleavage Maxim Big Game Weekend Super Bowl Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh yeah….stepped into my limo baby

  12. Pink Backup Dancer Feeling Her Crotch
    Commented on this photo:

    Four dudes and a microphone.

  13. David Beckham Huge Crotch Poster Bodywear Launch
    Commented on this photo:

    And she’s actually very pretty!

  14. Woody Allen Holding Daughters Shoulders Knicks Game
    Son of Flubber
    Commented on this photo:

    The black van with the painted out windows, and bags of candy in the back, is our ride. Here, smell this new perfume, just breathe in deep…

  15. Tom Arnold Skinny Weight Loss DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Commented on this photo:

    Stephen Colbert in 10 years.

  16. Heather Locklear No Makeup
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like she was left in the washing machine too long.

  17. Stephen Baldwin Rutger Hauer Michael Madsen Sights Of Death Pre Berlinale Party NUR BAR
    Commented on this photo:

    Of course they are at the “Sights of Death Party.” It would just be “Party” if they weren’t there.

  18. Joanna Krupa Cleavage See Through Dress PreGame Bash Hyde Bellagio
    Commented on this photo:

    Now I can’t see a pic of her without thinking of the words, “Dis how Chicken______”

  19. Steven Tyler Howard Sterns Birthday Bash SiriusXM
    Son of Flubber
    Commented on this photo:

    “Johnny Depp, I’m your father.”, “NOoooooooo!”

  20. Woody Allen Holding Daughters Shoulders Knicks Game
    Commented on this photo:

    He has such a good track record with Asian chicks.

  21. John McCain Yellow Teeth Laughing Dinner For The Munich Security Conference At Munich Residenz
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone stole Flavor Flav’s gold teeth. Or his regular teeth.

  22. Joanna Krupa Cleavage See Through Dress PreGame Bash Hyde Bellagio
    Commented on this photo:

    “Joanna! Who are you pulling for in the big game?”

    “Dis how chicken wake human: Cock.”

    “Errrrr……pardon?”

    “A Dewdle Dew”.

  23. Queen Elizabeth Peeking From Behind Tree Church Service
    kafak
    Commented on this photo:

    “Is that… Morrissey? I’ll give you a crown jewel if you nail him in the back of the head with a spit ball right now.”

  24. Rod Stewart Holding Nose Penny Lancaster Backseat
    Commented on this photo:

    Are they in a hearse?

  25. Adrienne Bailon Cleavage Airbnb Rock Nation Sports Celebration 4040 Club
    Richard R
    Commented on this photo:

    look at that schnnozz

  26. Woody Allen Holding Daughters Shoulders Knicks Game
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that his wife or kid?

  27. Kim Kardashian Fat Stuffed Into Tight Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    Gross.

  28. Kylie Jenner Legs Slit Dress
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Their love of black penis bonds them.

  29. Alyssa Milano Cleavage Maxim Big Game Weekend Super Bowl Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes please!

  30. Hilary Duff Butt Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Agdal does it better

  31. Queen Elizabeth Peeking From Behind Tree Church Service
    Commented on this photo:

    Tired with the Olson Twins, Bob Saget decides to try a cougar.

  32. Jon Gosselin Sticking Tongue Out Maxim Big Game Weekend Super Bowl Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Gross

  33. Shia LaBeouf Skinny Jeans Tucked Into Combat Boots Blue Socks
    Bubba
    Commented on this photo:

    “You guyyyyyyyysssss……come on! I’m retired from public liiiiiiife-uh. Ahhhhhhh.”

  34. Kim Kardashian Fat Stuffed Into Tight Clothes
    Son of Flubber
    Commented on this photo:

    They called me mad at Harvard Medical when I graphed a female head on a fat cows body. Who’s laughing now!?!

  35. Heather Locklear No Makeup
    Commented on this photo:

    Finally Jocelyn Wildenstein is getting some of her money’s worth.

  36. Woody Allen Holding Daughters Shoulders Knicks Game
    Commented on this photo:

    What a wonky, pink eyed old pedophile.

  37. Chris Christie Holding Helmet Super Bowl XLVIII Handoff Ceremony
    Fancy Face
    Commented on this photo:

    He would have gotten there sooner, but traffic was murder

  38. Ashton Kutcher Mila Kunis Pregnant Fat Face Weight Gain
    kafak
    Commented on this photo:

    Funny, the look on his face is the same one she gets on hers while he’s doing her.

  39. John McCain Yellow Teeth Laughing Dinner For The Munich Security Conference At Munich Residenz
    Judd
    Commented on this photo:

    OMG! I think its the twin brother of Jerry Sandusky!

  40. Queen Elizabeth Peeking From Behind Tree Church Service
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    “Oh how I love to hide behind Edward III’s tombstone, then jump out and scare the commoners!”
    “Yes, Your Higness. A most entertaining game.”

  41. John McCain Yellow Teeth Laughing Dinner For The Munich Security Conference At Munich Residenz
    Commented on this photo:

    “High five, Senator McCain!”
    “Oh, hahaha. You got me you fucking bastard.”

  42. Tracy Morgan Fat Belly Lifting Shirt Up Loss DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    “C’mon, Black Quato, come on out! Don’t be shy, now!”

  43. Pink Backup Dancer Feeling Her Crotch
    kafak
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know if it’s the lighting or not, but I’m definitely seeing bulge on Pink.

  44. Michael C Hall Spitting At Paparazzi
    Commented on this photo:

    That looks more like his character form “Six Feet Under” than Dexter.

  45. Pink Backup Dancer Feeling Her Crotch
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    “Some day, I’ll be promoted from penis squisher to real dancer,” thought bald black guy.

  46. Steven Tyler Howard Sterns Birthday Bash SiriusXM
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Her tits are too small and her goatee is too big.

  47. Jon Gosselin Sticking Tongue Out Maxim Big Game Weekend Super Bowl Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Trying to get that Miley money.

  48. Hannah Davis Butt Yoga Pants DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Commented on this photo:

    Very nice.

  49. Steven Tyler Howard Sterns Birthday Bash SiriusXM
    Commented on this photo:

    I loved his character in Gremlins.

  50. Shia LaBeouf Skinny Jeans Tucked Into Combat Boots Blue Socks
    Senor Trout
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s 27. Let’s say 35.5 is the over/under on the age when he wakes up one morning and realizes he has been a fucking moron most of his adult life.

    I’ll take the over.

    • The Pope

      Well if he’s 27 then he’s definitely going to die this year. It would be too original to die when he’s 28.

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