The Crap We Missed – Monday 2.3.14

February 3rd, 2014 // 528 Comments

Don’t even act like you don’t know who that is.

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed where I’ll just shoot it to you guys straight. It’s snowing like a motherfucker here and that puts me in a mood most foul, so instead of trying to make this post seem more interesting than a goddamn flaming-hammer-of-justice wielding ambulance chaser I’ll just go ahead and lower that bar. There’s Dexter spitting in the general direction of the paparazzi – SCANDAL!, David Hasselhoff driving what must be one of those french fry grease powered cars, and Woody Allen who’s apparently allowed to bring his own treats into sporting events.

What? Oh, I crossed the line? My apologies, he’s real stand-up dude, I shouldn’t have,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Naomi Watts Liev Schreiber Climbing Rope
    Commented on this photo:

    Liev’s trying to escape up the rope after giving that girl and epic vag wedgie.

  2. Rod Stewart Holding Nose Penny Lancaster Backseat
    Hugh G. Rection
    Commented on this photo:

    I haven’t kept up with Rod Stewart, but I’m guessing Penny Lancaster isn’t his daughter.

  3. Ireland Baldwin Butt Yoga Pants Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Presenting….

  4. Cate Blanchett 29th Santa Barbara International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    “And then I told him, ‘Well, I’m sorry, but I DID date John Hamm for a few weeks. I mean, it’s not your fault it feels this small to me.’”

  5. Kim Kardashian Fat Stuffed Into Tight Clothes
    Ralph
    Commented on this photo:

    What a fat pig.

    • MarketingMike

      Make that “Nasty” Fat Pig.
      Finally a shot without Photoshop.
      Bet she has Cellulite on her Cellulite…

  6. Taylor Swift Fan Being Thrown Out Of Concert
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn it! The assassin I sent failed. Oh well, my backup agent in the tutu is in postion.

  7. Jennifer Tilly Cleavage Holding Alex Trebeks Hand 2014 Writers Guild Awards Ceremony
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    What is big titties?

  8. Shia LaBeouf Skinny Jeans Tucked Into Combat Boots Blue Socks
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yes, I did invent Space Paranoids, Matrix Blaster, Vice Squad…a whole slew of them.”

  9. Woody Allen Holding Daughters Shoulders Knicks Game
    Hugh G. Rection
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d like to hope he hasn’t done anything inappropriate with the kids he had with his step-daughter turned wife. Wow, my keyboard didn’t fry after typing that sentence.

  10. Heather Locklear No Makeup
    Commented on this photo:

    Cocaine is a hell of a drug

  11. Ireland Baldwin Butt Yoga Pants Instagram
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    Look closely, there’s cameltoe!

  12. Jon Gosselin Sticking Tongue Out Maxim Big Game Weekend Super Bowl Party
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    God, please don’t twerk….please don’t twerk.

  13. Joanna Krupa Cleavage See Through Dress PreGame Bash Hyde Bellagio
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey you know at least she puts out.

  14. Naomi Watts Liev Schreiber Climbing Rope
    Commented on this photo:

    “EEEK A MOUSE!”
    “Stop being a pussy, Joe Jonas.”

  15. Tracy Morgan Fat Belly Lifting Shirt Up Loss DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Commented on this photo:

    That never gets old.

  16. Steven Tyler Howard Sterns Birthday Bash SiriusXM
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude look like a cancer victim.

  17. Shia LaBeouf Skinny Jeans Tucked Into Combat Boots Blue Socks
    meeps!
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is it never THIS guy found with a needle in his arm?

    (too soon…?)

  18. Kylie Jenner Legs Slit Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    And a gay friend

  19. Kim Kardashian Fat Stuffed Into Tight Clothes
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Thank god Kevin Smith was on hand to make a movie about her.

  20. Heather Locklear No Makeup
    Commented on this photo:

    Her face is showing her age but, still would.

  21. John McCain Yellow Teeth Laughing Dinner For The Munich Security Conference At Munich Residenz
    Commented on this photo:

    “John, you been eating Cheetos?”
    “No, why?”
    “Uhh….nevermind.”

  22. Heather Locklear No Makeup
    meeps!
    Commented on this photo:

    Aaaaand, scene.

  23. Micaela Schaefer Naked Body Paint Huge Stuffed Bear Berlinale
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    I really need to move to Germany.

  24. David Beckham Huge Crotch Poster Bodywear Launch
    Commented on this photo:

    It always restores David’s faith in humanity when he meets a woman that can actually express an emotion other than “soulless cunt”

  25. Pink Backup Dancer Feeling Her Crotch
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    By the way, which one is Pink ?

  26. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Pants Nina Agdal DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Smapdi
    Commented on this photo:

    Later, Menounos and Agdal teamed up and beat Peyton Manning and Broncos coach John Fox 52-0. Said Manning, “I was masturbating this time too.”

  27. Dr Oz AJ Calloway DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Commented on this photo:

    “TAKE IT. TAKE THE GREEN COFFEE BEAN PILL.”

  28. Nina Agdal Butt Yoga Pants DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Commented on this photo:

    I would make the I would wreck that for hours comment but truth is that is so tight I am sure i would splurge in 30 seconds..good news is she is so hot I would be hard again minutes later for my 2nd shot to wreck it and that time I would last at least a minute… ok right about a minute…
    Now the 3rd time…….aw heck with just let her sit on my face for the next couple hours :)

  29. Stephen Baldwin Rutger Hauer Michael Madsen Sights Of Death Pre Berlinale Party NUR BAR
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor Rutger, how the mighty have fallen.

  30. Kim Kardashian Fat Stuffed Into Tight Clothes
    tom
    Commented on this photo:

    More like Kim Lardashian to me.

  31. Shia LaBeouf Skinny Jeans Tucked Into Combat Boots Blue Socks
    Commented on this photo:

    Like my outfit? I copied it off some fucking asshole.

  32. Hannah Davis Butt Yoga Pants DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Commented on this photo:

    Spanktastic

  33. Kelly Brook Cleavage Lingerie Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    This may be an old picture, but she’s still as beautiful as ever.

  34. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Pants Nina Agdal DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Commented on this photo:

    damn so fine

  35. Rod Stewart Holding Nose Penny Lancaster Backseat
    Commented on this photo:

    *sniff sniff*

    “Fuck, i think I touched Adrian Grenier as I walked by him…”

  36. John McCain Yellow Teeth Laughing Dinner For The Munich Security Conference At Munich Residenz
    Commented on this photo:

    “No. I’m not English. Why do you ask?”

  37. Chrissy Teigen Cleavage Boob Window Dress SHAPE And Mens Fitness Super Bowl Concert Dinner Party
    Commented on this photo:

    “Wanna see my choo choo?”

  38. David Hasselhoff Screaming Race Car 2014 Acceleration Press Conference Katwijk The Netherlands
    Commented on this photo:

    Dammit Ned! You’re no KITT!

  39. Adrienne Bailon Cleavage Airbnb Rock Nation Sports Celebration 4040 Club
    Commented on this photo:

    Oompa Lumpy.

  40. Joanna Krupa Cleavage See Through Dress PreGame Bash Hyde Bellagio
    Commented on this photo:

    I would love to have her and Kelly Brook at the same time. Disappointing two women at once would be awesome.

  41. Gwen Stefani Huge Pregnant Belly
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    The monster truck car thing in the background is more interesting

  42. Kelly Brook Cleavage Lingerie Instagram
    pumpanddump
    Commented on this photo:

    You’re not foolin us anymore, Kelly. We saw those wide load pics of you with your douchebag boyfriend.

  43. Jon Gosselin Sticking Tongue Out Maxim Big Game Weekend Super Bowl Party
    Commented on this photo:

    The event security. This explains a lot.

  44. Adrienne Bailon Cleavage Airbnb Rock Nation Sports Celebration 4040 Club
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s always been sexy. But she did date a Kardashian for while. That’s a serious demerit.

  45. Kim Kardashian Fat Stuffed Into Tight Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    Hahahaha

  46. Heather Locklear No Makeup
    Commented on this photo:

    Gary Busey.

  47. David Hasselhoff Screaming Race Car 2014 Acceleration Press Conference Katwijk The Netherlands
    Commented on this photo:

    “SOBRIETY’S FUN, THEY SAID. YOU CAN STILL ENJOY LIFE, THEY SAID!”
    (rams car through wall of Burger King)

  48. Dr Oz AJ Calloway DIRECTV 8th Annual Celebrity Beach Bowl
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’ll show you demonic!”

  49. Cate Blanchett 29th Santa Barbara International Film Festival
    Son of Flubber
    Commented on this photo:

    Cate does impromptu finger puppets of Woody fondling young little girls: “Let me finger bang you”, “No”,”Come on, I’ll put you in a movie.”

  50. Kylie Jenner Legs Slit Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    oh jesus

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