“Up next is Tatiana. She’s from Russell Simmons‘ personal collection, only used twice and of course, speaks almost no English. Let’s start the bidding at $100.”
Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed which I’m not going to lie is almost entirely random T&A. I know, you’re all terribly disappointed. Anyway, for the two of you still left reading this, the few exceptions include Courtney Stodden‘s dad, who makes Papa Joe look like goddamn Ward Cleaver, Amber Rose ready to deliver what appears to be a dozen of Wiz Khalifa‘s children at any moment, and finally Deena Cortese and Lil Kim walking a runway presumably to make burn victims feel really, really awesome about themselves.
In every photo like this there’s always a Sigur Ros fan fondly remembering penis,
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Dude in the red jacket saw nipple.
This is what a ladybug looks like to someone on acid.
So, she’s becoming a taxi driver AND the taxi?
Wow.
Is that PhotoShopped?
I know she has a helluva body under there, so the question is do you make her wear the paper bag in bed even though the lights are already out?
I say yes. In fact, double bag it.
She ate a bunch of Sour Patch Kids before she walked out.
The more she covers up the better .
“I’m open! Double penetration!”
Props for being an awesome singer and the Springsteen t-shirt.
I don’t get this thing where the kids today are wearing T-shirts for bands and tours that were on before they were even born. I don’t remember anyone my age wearing “Peter, Paul & Mary at The Bitter End ’65″ shirts.
Is it a tacit acknowledgment that today’s music sucks and the best music is from previous generations? Okay. I can live with that.
It definitely is.
They should probably listen to the bands before they wear the shirts. Clarkson could have saved a lot of anguish if she’d found out in advance that Springsteen sucks.
OMG that is such a white boy.
Oh goodness, if I don’t get your ass-train straightened out, you’ll just look silly.
Manliest sashay I’ve ever seen
If Secretariat was Asian.
Then it would be Secleteliat.
I’ve had enough of her. Where’s Regular Sized Kim?
Is this typical winter garb in NY NY?
They’re making life sized BRATZ dolls now?
Every scratched square releases the pleasing scent of vodka or cheeseburgers!
“Sorry, you’re showing a little too much leg for network TV. Let me get that black band back up.”
Nice job hiding the penis.
You’re not fooling anybody with that 2 fingers jazz. We know you like the whole fist.
In a porn parody of M*A*S*H she would be Cockeye.
Never saw M*A*S*H but I’d watch the porn parody if she was in it.
I’m sorry to say that IMO it all looks awful.
You never get a second chance to make a first impression.
So, “The Reality of AIDS” is that if things don’t change, we’re all going to be dressing for the Thunderdome?
You never go full Betty Page.
“I’ve got two of them parked in my ass.”
It’s so nice they let actual AIDS patients get up on the runway during the charity event. It has to be a big boost to her self-esteem.
I don’t know any of these women. Are they buried deep in cable TV programming?
“Oh, hey there John Ha….”
Upper body muscle with ant legs…Check.
Overblown self-absorbed ego… Check.
He’s got the role of Johnny Bravo for sure.
♫Come on baby, let’s do the twist ♫
Must’ve just seen this years Budweiser Clydesdale ad on one of those big Piccadilly Circus tv screens
Lurch?
“Oh, yeah. Gimme some sugar, ba- Sorry, sweetheart! Thought you were your mom . . . again.”
I’ve heard of “kiss OF death”, but not “kissed BY death”
Ah ha! So SHE’S the villain in the next Star Trek!
When did Ryan Seacrest became a Chippendales dancer?!
One girl, two cups …
I think I saw that on YouTube.
Looks like a goth bobblehead.
100% Kardashian — Findus
“Why yes, I’d LOVE a lump of sugar!”
I laughed so hard I nearly delivered
She’s a little bit Heat Miser a little bit Snow Miser. I like it.
Still would.
“Why yes, I’d LOVE a lump of sugar!”
This was meant for Chelsea Handler’s picture, another horse-face, no idea why it showed up on this one…
I’ll bet she does.
Almost life like. Almost.
What about the reality of fucked up plastic surgery?
Healthy looking woman.
This kid just exudes manliness.
She can’t sleep lying down, it’ll stop her heart.