The Crap We Missed – Monday 7.11.11

July 11th, 2011 // 851 Comments

“Bloody Tom Cruise. ‘Just one more drink, David. You can sleep on the couch, David. Let me wash those knickers, David. It’s just my E-meter, David…’”

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed, loaded to capacity with Derek Jeter needing to die quickly, Hines Ward honoring Ryan Dunn, Robin Thicke by request and MacGyver about to build an actual cherry bomb or bore someone to tears about the importance of fiber.

Someone should make Ben Affleck and Mel Gibson grumble-fight,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Gisele Bundchen
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Gisele and Tom are so together! They share uniforms, and hairdos!

  2. Tori Spelling
    Rachel
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know Nancy Grace was pregnant again…

  3. Paris Hilton Popsicle
    Mark B
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor creamsicle’s gonna need an STD test now. :(

  4. Tara Reid
    Chinny
    Commented on this photo:

    Why do I get the feeling she’s waving to imaginary people just like Ronnie in the Xenadrine commercial.

  5. Emile Hirsch
    justuhbill
    Commented on this photo:

    Who would have thought the Corey Feldman look would come back into style…

  6. Ben Affleck
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    (……fatherhood is a helluva drug….)

  7. Paz De La Huerta
    UnholyKrep
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is she gonna tongue her grampa in a street side cafe?

  8. Brooke Shields
    Box
    Commented on this photo:

    hey! at least the Latisse is working for her.

  9. Goldie Hawn
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes, but which one is her?

  10. Paz De La Huerta
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    “Gonna bite that phone right outta his hand! Pay attention to ME!!!!”

  11. Lady Gaga See Through Skirt
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    Madonna?

  12. Marie Osmond
    CptCreep
    Commented on this photo:

    Why doesn’t she have to wear the magic underwear?

    • Lemmiwinks

      Good question. If her son had been wearing them he’d have bounced after jumping from that window instead of going ker-splat..

    • bbiowa

      The magic underwear would fit under this. But she’s been divorced twice, so she may no longer be worthy of the magic underwear.

  13. Richard Dean Anderson
    justuhbill
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey look – a Cherry Poppin’ Granddaddy!

  14. Brooke Shields
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m not certain that she really needs to draw attention to her eyes

  15. Ricky Martin
    Lemmiwinks
    Commented on this photo:

    Currently The Biggest Douche In Deutschland.

  16. Ashlee Simpson New Boyfriend Vincent Piazza
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Preggers already?

  17. Megan Fox
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    “Den da botox lady slipped an da needle hit my tongue”

  18. David Hasselhoff
    justuhbill
    Commented on this photo:

    Fun fact – he hasn’t taken that t-shirt off since 1997.

    • DKNY

      I know, right?

      Actually what would be even sadder is if he had an entire wardrobe of like 1000 of those tshirts, and nothing else.

  19. Paris Hilton Popsicle
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    What a challenge.

  20. Taylor Momsen Nipple Electrical Tape
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Jeez lady gaga, go home….

  21. Christoph Waltz
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “i’m zere for ze BARBEQUEeeeeee!”

  22. Ben Affleck
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    He Ben..what up with the hair?

  23. Taylor Momsen Nipple Electrical Tape
    UnholyKrep
    Commented on this photo:

    And in the end all talentless, would be, young female singers these days morph into an unfortunate slurry made up of equal parts Madonna, Courtney Love, and Everclear fuelled Tara Reid

  24. Taylor Momsen Nipple Electrical Tape
    PowerMuff
    Commented on this photo:

    Okay, we get it! We get it! You’re a dumpster slut.

  25. Jenny McCarthy See Through Shirt
    brooke
    Commented on this photo:

    i think that’s her nipple ring, actually.

  26. Brooke Shields
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    Okay, she had better be Morticia in the Addams Family or there is no excuse for this.

  27. Brooke Shields
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Man, Charlie looks like shit.

  28. Diddy
    PowerMuff
    Commented on this photo:

    Pubes on the chin must be all the rage in some circles…

  29. Tara Reid
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    This skeleton has weird tits

  30. Belen Rodriguez Bikini
    CptCreep
    Commented on this photo:

    Moar Pancakes!!!

  31. Jenny McCarthy See Through Shirt
    schmotze
    Commented on this photo:

    yup. she’s shining nippledness

  32. Jenny McCarthy See Through Shirt
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Well yes Jenny, I Always wear my see through shirts at the airport; TSA and all…

  33. Hines Ward Mugshot DUI
    Lemmiwinks
    Commented on this photo:

    Reigning champion of last season’s Dancing With The Breathalyzers.

  34. Tori Spelling
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    Notice how she now always wears the bag to cover the black hole in her chest.

  35. Tori Spelling
    Cam
    Commented on this photo:

    I really don’t know why she’s carrying all those bags when we all know her neck hole can hold twice that load.

  36. Ben Affleck
    UnholyKrep
    Commented on this photo:

    Chasing Lamey.

    No, wait. Caught.

  37. David Beckham Buttcheek
    Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    “BLIMEY, I haven’t seen this many dimples since Gary Coleman!”

  38. Tori Spelling
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s logical to assume that her water just broke and she’s picking up some food on the way to the hospital.

  39. Paris Hilton Popsicle
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “noooo….NOOOO… AHHHHH (garglegarglegargle)”

  40. Marie Osmond
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Michael Jackson?

  41. Penelope Cruz
    Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    “Now WHERE did Tom go? He handed me this E-meter and then ran off…sniff sniff…wait a second! This is his TAINT METER!!!!”

  42. Emile Hirsch
    UnholyKrep
    Commented on this photo:

    The one on the right looks nothing at all like Corey Haim. Stupid.

  43. Belen Rodriguez Bikini
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, but this time he’s saying it all with his gold watch

  44. Ricky Martin
    Jack
    Commented on this photo:

    “HE BANGS! HE BANGS!”

  45. Jersey Shore The Situation Mike Sorrentino
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Hahahahah!!! Fattyfattyfatfatfat!!!

  46. Richard Dean Anderson
    UnholyKrep
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah love ewe, Mahry.

  47. Paz De La Huerta
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    Who remembers Lifeforce?

  48. Keri Hilson
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m tossed between ‘you suck’ and ‘sucker!’

  49. Belen Rodriguez Bikini
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty sweet granny cans photo-bomb.

    • some guy

      +1

      Is it wrong that I rubbed one out to the topless granny? I figured I’d keep it real since I have no chance with this smokin hot brunette, whoever she is.

      • MrsWrong

        I think if those nips get u hard a mirror might make u happy 4-eva. I call it the Circle of Non-Life(Hakuna Matata). You are doing God’s work. Please, continue to not-produce. We thank you and your grandma-nipple-loving-freak-ass.

  50. Hines Ward Mugshot DUI
    BSting
    Commented on this photo:

    Photo credit: Supercuts

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