The Crap We Missed – Monday 7.11.11

July 11th, 2011 // 851 Comments

“Bloody Tom Cruise. ‘Just one more drink, David. You can sleep on the couch, David. Let me wash those knickers, David. It’s just my E-meter, David…’”

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed, loaded to capacity with Derek Jeter needing to die quickly, Hines Ward honoring Ryan Dunn, Robin Thicke by request and MacGyver about to build an actual cherry bomb or bore someone to tears about the importance of fiber.

Someone should make Ben Affleck and Mel Gibson grumble-fight,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Belen Rodriguez Bikini
    Slouch
    Commented on this photo:

    Boobies in the background!

  2. Ricky Martin
    Commented on this photo:

    Penis Button docking station.

  3. Marg Helgenberger Bikini
    Mandi
    Commented on this photo:

    Whoa, Marg… Wasn’t expecting that body!

  4. Tobey Maguire
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    Complete jerk with a douchey beard and married with kids and I DON’T CARE NOM NOM NOM.

  5. Nicholas Cage
    Commented on this photo:

    so these are the next two he’s gonna ruin?

  6. Gisele Bundchen
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    This is why Tom Brady doesn’t care about the NFL lockout.

  7. Rosie O'Donnell
    Rough's goop du jour
    Commented on this photo:

    But in all seriousness, if Popeye doesn’t have a can of spinach near by, he’s toast.

  8. Robin Thicke Shirtless
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    Y’know, I had no idea who Robin Thicke was before this. I always assumed it was a chick.

  9. Selma Blair Pregnant Jason Bleick
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    How long has she been pregnant? Like, three years?

  10. Rosie O'Donnell
    Steve
    Commented on this photo:

    Apparently Brett Hart has been alive all this time… living on a steady diet of funnel cakes.

  11. Taylor Momsen Nipple Electrical Tape
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Has anyone heard what the music sounds like coming out of this daddy’s nightmare that is fueled by attention ?

  12. Ashlee Simpson New Boyfriend Vincent Piazza
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    So a baby can really grow in there?

  13. Ricky Martin
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    “Come with me! I show you the way to the hershey highway”

  14. Taylor Momsen Nipple Electrical Tape
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    In less than a year, the tape comes off, as well as more clothing.

  15. Jersey Shore The Situation Mike Sorrentino
    Commented on this photo:

    He hates when he steps in gonorrhea.

  16. Ricky Martin
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “Dyin’ of AIDS la loca!”

  17. Taylor Momsen Nipple Electrical Tape
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    This belongs on a motivational picture called “Daddy’s little FAIL”

  18. Marie Osmond
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    Where did those things come from?

  19. Ben Affleck
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know Ben had down syndrome

  20. Ashley Greene
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    Who was ranting before about girls wearing t-shirts of albums cut before they were born? Boy, is he or she going to be mad when he or she sees this.

    • Lemmiwinks

      Unlikely she has any idea there was an album by that name. Unlikely she has any ideas, period.

    • If she were also wearing a half-windsor knotted tie, McFeely’s head would explode.

      • I’m not doing too well as it is.

        Yet ANOTHER hollywood prostitot who thinks she’s being clever wearing t-shirts from 15 years before she was born. Way to discover one of the most popular albums of all time there princess…very cutting edge.

  21. Penelope Cruz
    Johnny Pepper
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugly bitch. Although, with a bag in her face things could really work well between me and her.

  22. Brooke Shields
    Porter
    Commented on this photo:

    Glamour…FAIL.

  23. Tobey Maguire
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    Anyone else see this as practice for being pedophile?

  24. Paz De La Huerta
    Dina
    Commented on this photo:

    Finally, someone is sucking out what’s left of Mel Gibson’s soul.

  25. David Beckham Buttcheek
    Commented on this photo:

    “do these effectively hide my thunder?”

  26. Jenny McCarthy See Through Shirt
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    You can just see the crazy radiating off of her

  27. Megan Fox
    Steve
    Commented on this photo:

    Her career seems to be going well… Is this sequel to Kazaam?

  28. Richard Dean Anderson
    GuidotheRed
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hold on a sec while I McGuyver myself an erection.”

  29. Brooke Shields
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    She is getting into makeup for the Addams Family shoot. Read the hat.

  30. Ricky Martin
    UnholyKrep
    Commented on this photo:

    Heeekory Deekory Doc
    La raton ran up the clock…HO!

    thus spake Andrew Dice Martin.

  31. Paz De La Huerta
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    (in Bobcat Goldthwait voice)

    “DarllING…you dRAnk my LAST FUCKING DRINK. Puke it INTO MY MOUTH. RarrrraahhhHHH!”

  32. Hines Ward Mugshot DUI
    justuhbill
    Commented on this photo:

    He really had to bite down on his bottom lip to prevent his smile from shining through!

  33. Tobey Maguire
    Dina
    Commented on this photo:

    “Sorry sweetie, but daddy lost you in a poker game last night. I had three-of-a-kind, it was a lock!”

  34. Nicholas Cage
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    Juicy. She is a juicy. It’s too bad his first born wasn’t smart enough. You always go for a juicy. They’ll stick with you no matter what!

  35. Paris Hilton Popsicle
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    She is just keeping in practice.

  36. Ashlee Simpson New Boyfriend Vincent Piazza
    justuhbill
    Commented on this photo:

    I hear if she gets caught faking it in bed that she gets up, does a stupid irish jig, and immediately exits the room.

  37. Rosie O'Donnell
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    I seriously thought that was Jack Black for a minute..

  38. Tori Spelling
    Dina
    Commented on this photo:

    “Om nom nom nom”

  39. Rosie O'Donnell
    Mark B
    Commented on this photo:

    If we are going to go with the wrestling theme, that is a younger brunette version of Greg The Hammer Valentine.

  40. Kathy Griffin
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    My precious..

  41. Tori Spelling
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    She has been looking *extremely* pissed lately.

  42. Belen Rodriguez Bikini
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    Thats right, lick my belly clean.

  43. Rosie O'Donnell
    GuidotheRed
    Commented on this photo:

    Hurley returning to the Island

  44. Ricky Martin
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Thank god he didn’t grab his crotch! Then people might think he’s not gay!

  45. Minka Kelly Derek Jeter
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d stare at his ass too

  46. Hines Ward Mugshot DUI
    UnholyKrep
    Commented on this photo:

    “Dat bahtendah was plick! Porrice man was bastahd! I was flamed!
    When I carr my goo flen Ben Rongrastname, you be clying in ya own meerk!”

  47. David Beckham Buttcheek
    Lemmiwinks
    Commented on this photo:

    That is one remarkably hairless mofo. I had no idea soccer required body waxing.

  48. Ben Affleck
    justuhbill
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he shooting a flashback episode of House?

  49. Brooke Shields
    Oh Snap
    Commented on this photo:

    Are they making a black swan part 2?

  50. Belen Rodriguez Bikini
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    good eye. But I still have no clue who this chic is.

    • Does it really matter. 3 photos in and I don’t care if she just came from shooting the pope in the taint with a pellet gun. I am only interested in one thing only. bending her over that kid and giving it to her long and hard.

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