The Crap We Missed – Monday 10.8.12

October 8th, 2012 // 545 Comments

What do you mean this isn’t an unedited photo of her in the morning? YOU LIE.

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed coming at you earlier than usual because we have hard, turgid, possibly purple-headed data (No idea why I just made that into a dick joke.) that says most of you have the day off today. So enjoy this random smattering of celebrity schadenfreude which actually has a Final Five that isn’t Rita Rusic or Scotty Pippen’s old lady because Elderly Week ended Friday with our annual “Mmmm, You Take Out Those Dentures” Festival. In fact, it’s Nicole Scherzinger who somehow looks more and more breastacular right down to the fifth shot. Trust me on this one.

Fall back into my arms and I will catch- Ooh, a quarter…

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Russell Simmons Shirtless Leila Lopes Bikini
    Ana
    Commented on this photo:

    The look on his face: Haha, motherfucker!
    The look on her face: Ha.. ha… motherfucker. -.-

  2. David Beckham Stretching
    sheldon
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t believe someone photoshopped out Tom Cruise.

  3. Steven Tyler Scarf Gay Friend
    Skeezix
    Commented on this photo:

    “Next on BRAVO, ‘The Real Housewives of New Jersey’ “

  4. Christina Aguilera Naked New Album Cover
    Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    Reverse bukkake — everywhere except her face.

  5. Matthew McConaughey Skinny Moustache
    Commented on this photo:

    I get elderly but they stay the same age.

  6. Russell Simmons Shirtless Leila Lopes Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “Haha, the water just got all warm!”

  7. Halle Berry Cleavage 4th Annual Power of Women Event
    Jman
    Commented on this photo:

    The power of women who have illegitimate babies with errant men.

  8. Steven Tyler Scarf Gay Friend
    Commented on this photo:

    Paps almost got a photo of them holding hands, so close…

  9. Daryl Hannah Blocking Construction Equipment
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yar! YOU SHALL NOT PASSSSSSSS! “

  10. Elizabeth Hurley
    Commented on this photo:

    You know you’ve got some money when you can pay Tim Gunn to follow you around all day with an umbrella!

  11. Brett Ratner Fanita Presman 8th Annual GLSEN Respect Awards
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    This lady must be 340 years old based on the size that her ear grew to.

  12. Sean Penn Hat Ponytail Sunglasses Checking Out Random Woman
    Jman
    Commented on this photo:

    Say what you want about Sean but when you wear Asics and a take-off RUN DMC t-shirt you’re alright in my book.

  13. Rita Ora Signing Fans Butt Cheek
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m surprised you can’t see vapor trails coming out of that butt crack.

  14. Heidi Klum Eating Popsicle
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    She is so multicultural.

  15. Carl Weathers Fedora Charity Poker Tournament
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “You’re an asset! An expendable asset! And I used you to get the job done, DAMN IT!”

  16. Kim Kardashian Nipples No Underwear Maxi Dress
    anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    Hate this bitch but this is probably the best she’s looked in a while. At least she not wearing stupid shoulder pads or those tights that make her look like she’s wearing a pamper and needs to be changed ASAP.

  17. Steven Tyler Scarf Gay Friend
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Once, just once, I want one of these fucking hipsters like that guy on the left to come to an Eagles tailgate. Just once.

  18. Christina Aguilera Naked New Album Cover
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Christina Aguilera, promoting the skills of someone with great Photoshop talent.

  19. Peter Dinklage Yarmulke The Angriest Man In Brooklyn Set
    anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    Obviously going to the taller chair to sit in just to fuck with the dude who has to sit in the shorter chair.

  20. Heidi Klum Eating Popsicle
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Practice makes perfect!

  21. David Beckham Stretching
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Ghosts.. everywhere, ghosts. Even up my bum!

  22. Sean Penn Hat Ponytail Sunglasses Checking Out Random Woman
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Mmmm.. titties.

  23. Tamara Ecclestone Cleavage Legs Minidress
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Say what you want, but I’m THAT GUY that would be pushing her head down into my lap as soon as she got into the limo.

    That guy, given the opportunity that is.

    • Miranda Veracruz De La Hoya Cardenal

      THIS is an opportunity?

      • I don’t believe that’s what he said. Of course this isn’t an opportunity. But there are so many people in here denigrating this woman that “The Deacon” felt compelled to stand up for her. As do I. So when she’s finished with you, Deacon, pass her on over.

      • Deacon Jones

        Man, they’re really ganging up on us with this one, Vito

  24. Steven Tyler Scarf Gay Friend
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    First pic I’ve seen in a while where Steven Tyler actually looks like a man. Oh wait.. nevermind.

  25. Tamara Ecclestone Cleavage Legs Minidress
    bethy
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought Russell Brand enjoyed blurring the gender lines, but clearly he has made his decision.

  26. Elijah Wood Sitges Film Festival
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is this man trying to look like a 6 yr old boy? Is this some new look that I’m not aware of?

  27. Nicole Scherzinger Cleavage Tight Dress
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    (they’re looking at me for my talent :-), I HAVE made it…)

  28. Kim Kardashian Nipples No Underwear Maxi Dress
    skyokow
    Commented on this photo:
  29. Steve-O Naked Dick Pushed Between Legs
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    This is why I haven’t chosen sobriety yet, people.

  30. Christina Aguilera Naked New Album Cover
    Commented on this photo:

    “What the Munchkins want to know is are you a good witch or a bad witch?”

  31. Steve-O Naked Dick Pushed Between Legs
    bethy
    Commented on this photo:

    It has vowed to never untuck itself, due to all of the past abuse.

  32. Kim Kardashian Nipples No Underwear Maxi Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    A cow in a mu mu, how ironic.

  33. Kim Kardashian Nipples No Underwear Maxi Dress
    Kelly
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim had planned to announce that she was becoming a buddhist later in a large press conference until she found out she would need to shave her head. Now she’s just an idiot in Egyptian Cotton.

  34. Amber Rose Cleavage Pregnant Belly
    Jill_Ess
    Commented on this photo:

    Anne Hathaway always takes her character roles so seriously. I can’t wait to see ‘Robopocalypse!’

  35. Matthew McConaughey Skinny Moustache
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he playing an English chap with cancer?

  36. Heidi Klum Eating Popsicle
    Commented on this photo:

    Obligatory rainbow pseudo-penis reference…

    [img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/08/rainbow-dildo-300_300.jpg[/img]

  37. Steven Tyler Scarf Gay Friend
    BillEBuoy
    Commented on this photo:

    On his way to visit Russel Brand, I see.

  38. Daryl Hannah Blocking Construction Equipment
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Ironically, they were building a hippie commune.

  39. David Beckham Stretching
    Commented on this photo:

    “Beckham has taken a terrible shot…he’s shaking like a dog passing peach pits…”

  40. Steven Tyler Scarf Gay Friend
    Jman
    Commented on this photo:

    I think Out of the Closet used clothing stores do a pretty good job myself.

  41. Christina Aguilera Naked New Album Cover
    Animal
    Commented on this photo:

    All whited out so you can’t see anything. Doesn’t she have the balls to show us her stuff? Or perhaps this is because she actually has balls?

  42. Brett Ratner Fanita Presman 8th Annual GLSEN Respect Awards
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    So if I go to these stupid awards and pretend to respect women, I can still bang chicks on the casting couch, right?

  43. Sean Penn Hat Ponytail Sunglasses Checking Out Random Woman
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    He probably just wants to educate her about Haiti.

  44. Carl Weathers Fedora Charity Poker Tournament
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    When did Apollo Creed turn into Fred Sanford?

  45. Ashley Greene Cleavage 4th Annual Power Of Women Event
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll empower women by showing my titties.

  46. Kim Kardashian Nipples No Underwear Maxi Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    “All right, Kanye, a joke’s a joke, but you need to take off my dress. I can’t walk around in this bed sheet all day…”

  47. Steven Tyler Scarf Gay Friend
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty sure his stylist is the same guy that does costumes for The Waking Dead.

  48. Matthew McConaughey Skinny Moustache
    Commented on this photo:

    “C’mon home, son, and eat a peanut butter sandwich…or maybe a few.”

  49. Russell Simmons Shirtless Leila Lopes Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, y’all, guess where my index finger is…”

  50. Elijah Wood Sitges Film Festival
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s that Lassie? I’m dressed like a douchebag?

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