The Crap We Missed – Monday 10.8.12

October 8th, 2012 // 545 Comments

What do you mean this isn’t an unedited photo of her in the morning? YOU LIE.

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed coming at you earlier than usual because we have hard, turgid, possibly purple-headed data (No idea why I just made that into a dick joke.) that says most of you have the day off today. So enjoy this random smattering of celebrity schadenfreude which actually has a Final Five that isn’t Rita Rusic or Scotty Pippen’s old lady because Elderly Week ended Friday with our annual “Mmmm, You Take Out Those Dentures” Festival. In fact, it’s Nicole Scherzinger who somehow looks more and more breastacular right down to the fifth shot. Trust me on this one.

Fall back into my arms and I will catch- Ooh, a quarter…

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Matthew McConaughey Skinny Moustache
    vandinz
    Commented on this photo:

    WTF, is he dieing?

  2. Kim Kardashian Nipples No Underwear Maxi Dress
    Crissy
    Commented on this photo:

    A cow wearing a moo moo, how fitting…

  3. Brett Ratner Fanita Presman 8th Annual GLSEN Respect Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, the Crypt Keeper cleans up pretty well.

  4. Heidi Klum Eating Popsicle
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t get her wrong: she loves chocolate, but every so often she likes a change of pace.

  5. David Beckham Stretching
    IndySteel
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugh, I never should’ve borrowed these shoes from Michael Lohan.

  6. Tamara Ecclestone Cleavage Legs Minidress
    Crissy
    Commented on this photo:

    Anyway you can blur out the face a bit?

  7. Heidi Klum Eating Popsicle
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Barely gets a ‘C’ for effort.

  8. Christina Aguilera Naked New Album Cover
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s rising from a vat of whipped cream? Sounds about right.

  9. Heidi Klum Eating Popsicle
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s big, coloured and a mouthfull. Guess she’s still grieving her last relationship…

  10. Steve-O Naked Dick Pushed Between Legs
    Crissy
    Commented on this photo:

    If only Gaga could learn to tuck so well…

  11. David Beckham Stretching
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Dammit! Victoria and her anal beads!

  12. Daryl Hannah Blocking Construction Equipment
    Troll's Nighmare
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess she watched Avatar too many times and started to believe it could work in the real world too.

  13. Christina Aguilera Naked New Album Cover
    Commented on this photo:

    Halfway there.

  14. Joe Jonas Nick Jonas
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    Meth?

  15. Steven Tyler Scarf Gay Friend
    dmbishop
    Commented on this photo:

    Tyler’s looking good, but Timberlake is looking a little worn out.

  16. Christina Aguilera Naked New Album Cover
    Commented on this photo:

    You can almost taste the Photoshop

  17. Russell Simmons Shirtless Leila Lopes Bikini
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Haha, here’s an albacore for your hooha!

  18. Peter Dinklage Yarmulke The Angriest Man In Brooklyn Set
    Commented on this photo:

    I just know the script to this movie has a line that goes, “Do you have a little Jew in you? No? Would you like to?”

  19. Joe Jonas Nick Jonas
    Troll's Nighmare
    Commented on this photo:

    He just realized he left in his ass dildo and it shows through tight jeans.

  20. Halle Berry Cleavage 4th Annual Power of Women Event
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I watched ‘Gothika’ last night…stop smiling.

  21. Kim Kardashian Nipples No Underwear Maxi Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s wearing a tent here. She must know more about her future than we thought she did.

  22. Elisabetta Canalis Cleavage Tank Top
    Troll's Nighmare
    Commented on this photo:

    You had me at tits!

  23. Christina Aguilera Naked New Album Cover
    Jentilly
    Commented on this photo:

    A plain white background makes photoshopping so much easier!

  24. Daryl Hannah Blocking Construction Equipment
    rantatonne
    Commented on this photo:

    am i the only one that looked at the thumbnail and thought this was an elephant with its trunk stuck in sand?

  25. Christina Aguilera Naked New Album Cover
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she’s telling us she left a bright future behind her.

  26. Peter Dinklage Yarmulke The Angriest Man In Brooklyn Set
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    This is the eighth dwarf ‘Shyster’.

  27. Matthew McConaughey Skinny Moustache
    KC
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s worse than you think. He’s actually still not wearing a shirt.

  28. Sean Penn Hat Ponytail Sunglasses Checking Out Random Woman
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mmmm, another nice pair of tits for me to ruin.”

  29. Jennifer Lopez Spread Eagle Crotch Mesh Body Suit Wetten Dass
    Emma Watson's Vagina
    Commented on this photo:

    wow she just gave birth to a fully grown ass on stage.

  30. Heidi Klum Eating Popsicle
    Commented on this photo:

    Yup, evidence that she’s all stretched out by a black guy…

  31. Steven Tyler Scarf Gay Friend
    Troll's Nighmare
    Commented on this photo:

    Somewhere Liv Tyler is crying into a pillow and thinking about changing her name.

  32. Heidi Klum Eating Popsicle
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    When she hits green, she magically becomes more interesting.

  33. Matthew McConaughey Skinny Moustache
    Pine Table Fever
    Commented on this photo:

    Your move, Rock Hudson.

  34. David Beckham Stretching
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    Bracing for his Scientology initiation.

  35. David Beckham Stretching
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    That was a shitty performance.

  36. David Beckham Stretching
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    He wants you to drill one between the posts.

  37. Nicole Scherzinger Cleavage Tight Dress
    KC
    Commented on this photo:

    The show is being renamed The XXX-Factor.

  38. David Beckham Stretching
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    Shit It Like Beckham?

  39. Amber Rose Cleavage Pregnant Belly
    PtC
    Commented on this photo:

    Isn’t there a “you can’t bleach your hair while pregnant or your baby comes out retarded” rule?

  40. David Beckham Stretching
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    Automatically regrets kicking a female fan in the crotch.

  41. David Beckham Stretching
    Commented on this photo:

    Turf hump

  42. Kim Kardashian Nipples No Underwear Maxi Dress
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    Knock Knock
    Who’s there?
    Orange.
    Orange who?
    Orange you glad I took the attention off my ass?

  43. Kat Von D Cleavage Tank Top
    Henny
    Commented on this photo:

    I cannot WAIT to see what she looks like in 30 years

  44. Matthew McConaughey Skinny Moustache
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    Who remembers the movie Life Force?

  45. Peter Dinklage Yarmulke The Angriest Man In Brooklyn Set
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    Wearing a zhu zhu hat.

  46. Steve-O Naked Dick Pushed Between Legs
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow. And the women all complain about not getting enough eye candy here.

  47. Russell Simmons Shirtless Leila Lopes Bikini
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ha ha ha! You’re not me!!!! Hahahahaaaaa!”

  48. Peter Dinklage Yarmulke The Angriest Man In Brooklyn Set
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    Which chair is for him?

  49. Tamara Ecclestone Cleavage Legs Minidress
    Henny
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s about as fake as my past 5 orgasms

  50. Halle Berry Cleavage 4th Annual Power of Women Event
    Pierce Bronzetan
    Commented on this photo:

    God I’d love to Berry my face in those.

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