The Crap We Missed – Monday 10.24.11

October 24th, 2011 // 870 Comments

“Shucks! Ain’t no one said I look as purty as Jessicker Simpson before.”

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Ben Affleck just selling the shit out of being a parent – I’ve already stopped wearing condoms – Kim Kardashian patiently waiting for a black microphone and George Clooney realizing it’s been two weeks, 14 hours and 37 minutes since he’s had sex with a new vagina, so if you could just drop him off at the curb…

You swore to secrecy, Lithgow!

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Vanessa Minillo Nick Lachey
    McCamie
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey honey, Mr Thumb has a delivery to the back door!”

  2. Brandi Glanville Cleavage
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Wasn’t there some report that LeAnn bought the same size implants as this chick ?

  3. Paul Bettany
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    I come bearing gifts, Master Skarsgard

  4. Phoebe Price
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    LaToya looks terrible.

  5. Mike Nike

    One day she is going to look at these pictures and think what the fuck was i thinking. Time to grow up Britney. You don’t even sing live.

  6. Britney Spears Bikini Belly
    Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    Mah FUPAs hanging out.

  7. Julianne Hough Ryan Seacrest Ass Grab
    Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    My plug’s coming out, can you give it a push?

  8. David Hasselhoff
    Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    One facelift away from pure Liberace.

  9. Vanessa Minillo Nick Lachey
    zoya
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s going the way of Kathy Lee Gifford. Makeup cake face, endless range of stupid expressions and annoying as hell.

  10. Ben Affleck
    KC
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hurry up and pick something, girls. Daddy needs to get back to work at the cotton candy stand.”

  11. Jennifer Love Hewitt No Make Up Sweatpants
    zoya
    Commented on this photo:

    Jeezus. My lounge clothes don’t even look that bad. Why the hell is she wearing that. Looks like she stole the outfit from some fat guys goodwill pile.

  12. Hugh Jackman
    zoya
    Commented on this photo:

    Want! The coffee and the male.

  13. Julianne Hough Ryan Seacrest Ass Grab
    zoya
    Commented on this photo:

    Wish these two would self-implode.

  14. Britney Spears Bikini Belly
    VtFarmboy
    Commented on this photo:

    Somone needs to remind her that she isnt 17 any more. If only she would dress better and she might not be so fugly.

  15. David Hasselhoff
    Ana
    Commented on this photo:

    This is not a cheeseburger…

  16. Phoebe Price
    C Bass
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like a cheetah escaped the Zanesville aftermath. Someone get me my rifle.

  17. Melissa Gorga Fat Suit Real Housewives Of New Jersey
    Commented on this photo:

    And she STILL has less camel toe than Khloe Kardashian.

  18. Phoebe Price
    Commented on this photo:

    I assume they named her honorary Mrs. Bones?

  19. Julianne Hough Ryan Seacrest Ass Grab
    Hugh Jazz
    Commented on this photo:

    Hover hand.

  20. Britney Spears Bikini Belly
    reyna
    Commented on this photo:

    God, she looks crappy…

  21. Britney Spears Bikini Belly
    Ish Ka-bibble
    Commented on this photo:

    At least she isn’t cursed with self-awareness.

  22. Britney Spears Bikini Belly
    Commented on this photo:

    looks like she drank 4 of those beers in that “six pack” she had.

  23. Kelly Brook Butt
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    Didn’t her hair used to be a different color?

  24. Salma Hayek Antonio Banderas
    Deryn
    Commented on this photo:

    *This* is why he had those messy hairdos for so long — all I can see now is his ears.

  25. Jessie J Cleavage
    Lita
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d say that’s a nice camel toe but it’s more like the whole hoof.

  26. Snooki Cleavage
    Lita
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like Magda from There’s Something About Mary.

  27. Britney Spears Bikini Belly
    Dballs
    Commented on this photo:

    Did someone poke her in the tummy?

  28. Stacy Keibler George Clooney
    karmichael
    Commented on this photo:

    oh no no no mr.! you’re not going ANYwhere!

  29. terry

    Seriously….she needs an older man, someone in his late 50′s or early 60′s

  30. Britney Spears Bikini Belly
    CharmlessMan
    Commented on this photo:

    I gotta go pee-pee, y’all!

  31. Sean Astin
    JJ
    Commented on this photo:

    Rudy…..Tooty Fresh and Fruity

  32. Melissa Gorga Fat Suit Real Housewives Of New Jersey
    Studley Hungwell
    Commented on this photo:

    Somewhere, the Michelin man is fapping away to this

  33. Kim Kardashian Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Saddam Hussein. Moammar Gadhafi. Justin Beiber. Kim Kardashian. The cast of Jersey Shore. Anyone else I’m missing?

  34. MeCumOnU

    AH! KILL IT!!!!

  35. Jennifer Nicole Lee Side Boob Butt
    noob
    Commented on this photo:

    who is she?

  36. Jennifer Nicole Lee Side Boob Butt
    noob
    Commented on this photo:

    who is she????

  37. Vanessa Minillo Nick Lachey
    eskwire
    Commented on this photo:

    PICTURED: A typical airhead making a dopey spaced-out face for the camera, and Vanessa Minnillo.

  38. ash

    Yeah whoever dresses her should be fired. The costumes are hideous and do not flatter her at all.

  39. Kelly Brook Butt
    The Brown Streak
    Commented on this photo:

    She puts the joy in joysticks

  40. Snooki Cleavage
    gigitastic
    Commented on this photo:

    There is always an old lady in the background saying it all with her bemused smile . I have no idea why they have an Umpa Loompa in the store either Ma’me

  41. Phoebe Price
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    You must remember you can only destroy a zombie by smashing it’s head.

  42. Karissa Shannon See Through Dress Butt
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, I missed the Parade of Whores!

  43. Kim Kardashian Cleavage
    maknaeluca
    Commented on this photo:

    Those fake eyelashes… is she playing in a remake of a clockwork orange?

  44. Melissa Gorga Fat Suit Real Housewives Of New Jersey
    Mike
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like the Michelin Man fucked a Peep

  45. Phoebe Price
    Mike
    Commented on this photo:

    They told her they’d giver her the two pumpkins if she posed as “Mr. Bones” for a half hour.

  46. James Franco
    Jelena
    Commented on this photo:

    I wanna have sex with this guy

  47. Phoebe Price
    jb
    Commented on this photo:

    anyone know where I can buy a hat like this?

  48. Ben Affleck
    sharyl
    Commented on this photo:

    Pedobear is on the Move!

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