The Crap We Missed – Monday 10.22.12

October 22nd, 2012 // 688 Comments

Welcome to another super-sized Monday installment of The Crap We Missed that we almost couldn’t fit everything into until we lubed it up with Sean Penn‘s hair grease. We’ve also got the awkward moment when Neil Diamond realizes that George Clooney is changing the lyrics to publicly kick Stacy Keibler to the curb, Robert Pattinson broods harder than he’s ever brooded before, Helena Bonham Carter busts out the sweetest rack you’ll ever see on a walking corpse*, Costas Mandylor??, and finally, one of the most terrifying things I’ve ever seen. Seriously, why not just dangle that kid above the snapping jaws of an alligator, give her a fighting chance.

*Subject to change upon the death/zombie resurrection of Christina Hendricks, Kat Dennings, Katy Perry

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

 

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Jennifer Gimenez Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    These lopsided juggs brought to you by lax border control.

    (too racist?)

  2. Costas Mandylor Red Face
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Costas ‘Or Less’ Mandylor

  3. Rihanna Nipples See Through Dress Fire Music Video Set
    Commented on this photo:

    In the post-apocalyptic age, all the fire hydrants have been destroyed and firemen must urinate on fires to put them out. They do not, however, have to look you right in the eye when they do it.

  4. Sean Penn Greasy Hair Lolipop
    Commented on this photo:

    “I had a house burn down once, and everything in life burned, except my family, and it was so liberating. I didn`t have a bad moment about it. It sort of reinvigorated my interest in a lot of things. I wonder if there should be some kind of anarchy.”
    -Sean Penn.

  5. Rihanna Nipples See Through Dress Fire Music Video Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Rihanna, you’re never supposed to have your “high beams” on in a fog.

  6. Stacy Keibler Butt Tight Dress 26th Annniversary Carousel Of Hope Ball
    LegMan
    Commented on this photo:

    Perfection.

  7. Sean Penn Greasy Hair Lolipop
    Commented on this photo:

    “I want every woman in this room, in solidarity with the women of Haiti who have suffered more than any women in the world, to tell the man sitting next to her: ‘I am not going to fuck you tonight unless you pay up!’,”

    -Penn in Cannes 2012 for Haiti fundraiser.

  8. Melanie Griffith Cleavage Hugging Jamie Lee Curtis The Childrens Hospital Los Angeles Gala: Noche de Ninos
    Tidbit
    Commented on this photo:

    Surprise! I kept the penis!

  9. Lara Flynn Boyle Bad Facial Surgery
    Commented on this photo:

    Looking good! Only two more surgeries and she’ll look just like Susan Boyle.

  10. Jennifer Nicole Lee Nipples See Through Shirt Butt Yoga Pants Eating Soft Pretzel
    Commented on this photo:

    What the fuck?

  11. Willow Smith I Hate Everyone Jacket
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    He misspelt ‘having a dick’

  12. Calista Flockhart Hat Dark Circles Under Eyes
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Heeeey got aaaany jooobssss? I neeed auditiiooons man! I’ll blow you for one, i just need my fix!

  13. Melanie Griffith Cleavage Hugging Jamie Lee Curtis The Childrens Hospital Los Angeles Gala: Noche de Ninos
    Commented on this photo:

    One of these people is aging gracefully, the other one’s a plastic wreck. Of course I’d do them both, why you askin’?

  14. Jean-Claude Van Damme Statue Of Himself
    Schmecky Bernstein
    Commented on this photo:

    They paid for a giant bronze statue to get VanDamme to come and do some karate shit? I got him to do a full karate demo at my kid’s bar mitzvah for a hot pastrami on rye and bus fare. No wonder Europe is broke, they over pay for everything!

  15. Kelly Clarkson Huge Butt Tight Jeans
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    She really could be quite pretty if she tried. And she actually looks significantly better than she has for a long time.

  16. Torrie Wilson Bikini
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    That dude got some nice pecs.

  17. Kelly Clarkson Huge Butt Tight Jeans
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy motherfucking A

  18. Willow Smith I Hate Everyone Jacket
    kimmykimkim
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t tell it this is the daughter or the son.

  19. Mike Tyson Turtleneck Secret Of The Wings Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Not ANOTHER picture of Jamie Lee Curtis!

  20. Kelly Osbourne Boyfriend Matthew Mosshart Skinny Jeans Long Hair
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Los Angeles Community Theatre presents ‘The Princess And The Pea’

  21. Jennifer Nicole Lee Nipples See Through Shirt Butt Yoga Pants Eating Soft Pretzel
    Boo
    Commented on this photo:

    Like it.

  22. Mike Tyson Turtleneck Secret Of The Wings Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s not my fault. She came to my hotel room at 2:00 AM.

  23. Hilary Duff Cleavage Son Luca
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    No need to look so smug Lizzie, all you did was pop out a kid who looks like he wants to murder me for fapping on his mom.

  24. Costas Mandylor Red Face
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this the Euro trash version of Mickey Rourke?

  25. Renee Olstead Cleavage Dita Von Teese Collection Launch
    Craptard
    Commented on this photo:

    This was at the ‘Dita Von Teese Launch’? Where’d they launch her weird ass off to, deep space?

  26. Linda Hogan Brooke Hogan Nick Hogan Graduation From Icon Collective Music School
    Tidbit
    Commented on this photo:

    Try as you might, Brooke. But that diploma isn’t covering your lunchbox thermos penis under there.

  27. Costas Mandylor Red Face
    LegMan
    Commented on this photo:

    “Man, I thought I set the timer. I’ll have to use the rotissere next time.”

  28. Helena Bonham Carter Cleavage BFI London Film Festival Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow…One of the few times that big boobs don’t help!

  29. Ben Affleck Backseat Of Car
    Tidbit
    Commented on this photo:

    Matt Damon road head.

  30. Calista Flockhart Hat Dark Circles Under Eyes
    Commented on this photo:

    Quad shot nonfat soy latte with a shot of vanilla and chocolate shavings…just the thing to get the taste of 70 year old man scrotum out of your mouth.

  31. Renee Olstead Cleavage Dita Von Teese Collection Launch
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m not sure why, but I’m feeling a sudden compulsion to chew on a pencil eraser.

  32. Kelly Osbourne Boyfriend Matthew Mosshart Skinny Jeans Long Hair
    kimmykimkim
    Commented on this photo:

    Alright, I’m going to admit it. I like her hair color. *slaps self with back of hand*

    • Cock Dr

      I do too. What’s wrong with us?
      I’ll bet they fight over the mirror and hair care products.

      • kimmykimkim

        There’s nothing wrong with us, Cock Doc. It’s a pretty color that she’s been trying to get right for the longest time now. And finally she got it right. It also probably helps that we’re not distracted by her smoker’s teeth and hideous makeup. I bet their hair products are labeled or color coded.

      • SMOKER’S TEETH…??? Here I had been thinking that I might be willing to play one inning of “Hide the Salami” with her, then you mentioned smoker’s teeth…UGH! And thank you!

  33. Jay Leno Helmet
    LegMan
    Commented on this photo:

    Jay, why the long face?

  34. Robert Pattinson Brooding The Twilight Saga Breaking Dawn Part 2 Photocall
    Commented on this photo:

    He just found out that he was going to have to watch one of his awful films to do the narration for a DVD release.

  35. Jennifer Nicole Lee Nipples See Through Shirt Butt Yoga Pants Eating Soft Pretzel
    Commented on this photo:

    “yes, just ring me up for two cherries”

  36. Rihanna Nipples See Through Dress Fire Music Video Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Something, something, nipples. Yeap, good video.

  37. Sean Penn Greasy Hair Lolipop
    Tidbit
    Commented on this photo:

    How many licks does it take to get to the center of the fact that you’re a douche?

    a one…

    One. Just one.

  38. Robert Pattinson Brooding The Twilight Saga Breaking Dawn Part 2 Photocall
    Commented on this photo:

    In what gay world is this considered “The sexiest man alive?!?”

  39. Julianne Hough Butt Tight Dress 26th Annual Carousel Of Hope Ball
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Sorry dude in the background, she’s clearly not interested. Neither of them are.

  40. Jean-Claude Van Damme Statue Of Himself
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Jean-Claude Van Damme: Looking tough surrounded by a bunch of pansies

  41. Jennifer Nicole Lee Nipples See Through Shirt Butt Yoga Pants Eating Soft Pretzel
    Commented on this photo:

    Elastic bandage dresses are OUT, the new fashion is the “rickets illusion” tights.

  42. Sharon Stone Yoga Pants
    kimmykimkim
    Commented on this photo:

    Those pants are unforgivable.

  43. Jean-Claude Van Damme Statue Of Himself
    Tidbit
    Commented on this photo:

    Van Damme is being out acted by the statue.

  44. Ben Affleck Backseat Of Car
    Commented on this photo:

    Get out that little magnet pen and move around a few of those iron filings…you missed a spot on your left cheek.

  45. Willow Smith I Hate Everyone Jacket
    All of America
    Commented on this photo:

    Here’s hoping someone does a driveby on your ass!

  46. Natalie Portman Cleavage Michael Fassbender Red Sunglasses
    Troll's Nightmare
    Commented on this photo:

    Based on this photo we can already confirm she’s pregnant again. Somebody should tell her.

  47. Sean Penn Greasy Hair Lolipop
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s always nice to know that ANYBODY can sleep with Scarlett Johansson.

  48. Sean Penn Greasy Hair Lolipop
    meeps!
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude, where can I get one of those Mickey Rourke masks?

  49. Calista Flockhart Hat Dark Circles Under Eyes
    All of America
    Commented on this photo:

    Lara Flynn Boyle?

  50. Linda Hogan Brooke Hogan Nick Hogan Graduation From Icon Collective Music School
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, she’s just a chip off the ole’ turd monster, isn’t she?

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