Welcome to another super-sized Monday installment of The Crap We Missed that we almost couldn’t fit everything into until we lubed it up with Sean Penn‘s hair grease. We’ve also got the awkward moment when Neil Diamond realizes that George Clooney is changing the lyrics to publicly kick Stacy Keibler to the curb, Robert Pattinson broods harder than he’s ever brooded before, Helena Bonham Carter busts out the sweetest rack you’ll ever see on a walking corpse*, Costas Mandylor??, and finally, one of the most terrifying things I’ve ever seen. Seriously, why not just dangle that kid above the snapping jaws of an alligator, give her a fighting chance.
*Subject to change upon the death/zombie resurrection of Christina Hendricks, Kat Dennings, Katy Perry…
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
“I have given a name to my pain, and it is Batman.”
Ahh, what I wouldn’t give to be Jamie Lee Curtis’s penis in this picture.
I understand Nick attended that school so he could change stations on the car radio without turning his best friends into vegetables.
Well, don’t dress up too much for us.
This is the best Awkward Family Portrait entry yet!
Right back atcha.
Oh yeah!! Pierced Nip.
Another one that REALLY needs to shower. And a couple of months of sleep!
Just because she put some make up on, doesn’t mean she wont stab you in your sleep.
Those veins on her knockers look like a map of the tributaries of the Amazon.
2 small dogs and still looks way manlier than… Wait… sorry,… forgot she was with A-Rod…
WTF! Wipe off that stupid grin!
She’s aging in dog years too…why her boobies so sad?
Cause she used to be fatter.
the crotch of a barbie doll.
Isn’t he a little old for a movie with “Boy” still in the title?
He got the lollipop for not punching out any flight attendants while the plane was in the air.
Is it called a “graduation” if his mom already signed him up for the next session of lessons?
Raven has turned into one ugly lesbian.
Come to Butthead.
K-Stew is at it again! Poor Rob.
Seacrest…out. No, seriously. OUT.
It’s a camel tongue
You would be amazed at the clothing bargains you can find in a dumpster these days.
Who knew the big one was the pretty one
i’d like to eat the big one’s ass before it turns into the small one…
Her big ass would probably eat you first.
So unpopular that she needed to wear a shirt that let the people know why she was there…
One good looking MILF.
Sad, but probably she will not gain back her pre-birth body. But looks like she’s trying to get at least 80-90% of it back. Kudos!
You know the old adage, somewhere, someone is tired of fucking this hottie. In this case, that somewhere is about 5 pictures ago, with Neil Diamond.
The one guy on a motorcycle who I *don’t* want wearing a helmet.
Just tell us the truth…she pays you a certain amount of money to feature her every day. At least level with us. Because if I knew you were getting paid I would understand. But otherwise, no one wants to see this thing ever again.
I like my weekly dose of her.
But I’m getting very, very impatient waiting for that bukkake video to hit the internets.
I like her too. But even I have to admit her tits look ridiculous here. Like two cannons sticking out on a battleship. But with nipples.
I know I left my career around here somewhere.
Drunk man stumbling.
Rorge Looney at your service!
Let me guess, she heard “Secret” and “Wings” and thought she was getting a VIP tour at KFC.
Or the Kotex factory?
Is it any wonder the EU is a complete fucking mess.
Those are two nice Cantina Bowls. I take back everything bad I said about Head Chef Lorena Garcia.
This guy is watching the ass or the ilusion legs….
He’s just realizing what a dude’s tucked junk looks like from the back.
Fucking turds!
Nice haunches.
So this is the guy that caused that Banana Boat recall?
Yeah, tough life kid. You’ve got a mansion, everything you want, a movie career that you never earned, etc.–BUT OMG YOU HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THE OCCASIONAL PAPARAZZI TAKING YOUR PICTURE! POOR THING!
No men may want us but at least we have each other!
Looks legit.
Then we stick a giant spinning corkscrew between them and voila! Instant Cenobite!
And that’s just their heroin and snack luggage.
Maybe Fassbender shouldn’t go around murdering starlets when there are cameras around
Ok, WTF is up with her legs? Is that photoshop?
Nope, just really, really ugly “pants”.
That’s one well-breast-fed baby.
Street begging is far more effective when you look pregnant.
I don’t know what pregnancy did to her boobs, but she didn’t waste any time getting implants afterwards.
I agree. I don’t think we can credit motherhood with those. There was obviously some medical intervention involved.
Could just be some sort of magical “Wonder Bra” (or whatever the modern day version is called).
no amount of bra makes natural boobs look like this
[img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/23/fake-161_86.jpg[/img]
Maxipad Toe?
Can’t be. She hit menopause like two decades ago.