Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed, which once again lives up to the bloated mess this thing tends to be after a weekend of, how to put this, celebrinanigans? Anyway, today we’ve got Gerard Depardieu really letting loose (*takes bow*) at the premiere of I’m Not Even Going To Pretend To Give A Shit About The Title Of This Movie, Because You Don’t, Bristol Palin wantin’ preggers again, Daryl Hannah letting us know how many more surgeries before the penis is operational, while Arnold Schwarzenegger wisely put a chain on his before a live television appearance, Taylor Swift‘s photo for The Joy Book, the coolest dad in the world, followed by the polar opposite of that, and finally, wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?
The photo agency literally only had five of these. I call that kismet,
- Photo Boy
Click Here To Start The Gallery
Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
“No, you hang up first…. OK, we’ll do it together on three… One, two, three! You didn’t hang up either! OK, we’ll do it for real this time…”
Know how your ass is too big? When it’s gravitational forces actually distort the hemline on the bottom of your dress.
I do not usually have voyeuristic tendencies, but I would totally watch these two do it.
Do what… Daniel Craig’s shopping at the local Salvation Army Thrift Store?
boy, she sure is . . . giggly.
Why is it that this chick always looks like she’s shooting a period piece from the 50s? On a bike like this, or a swimsuit that Jackie O felt was too out of style, waist high granny panties, etc.
I haven’t watched The Nanny in years but I can still recall with soul-shattering precision the exact sound that would be coming out of her mouth right now if this picture were accompanied by sound.
“GET IN MAH BELLY!”
I didn’t recognize her without her backhanding one her children.
Oh look. Here’s Taylor Swift looking whimsically quirky. How refreshing.
“Not the face! The BOOBS!”
Her own ass needs a valet.
My favorite pizza topping!
Look! is Akon.. Look is Akon.. Look is Akon…. wait…..
Is the woman in the red shirt sitting on one of his rolls or farting to improve the air quality around Gerard?
The *woman* in red is really Gerard’s favourite (notice he can’t take his eyes off it) blow-up sex doll (you can see where the guy in black’s hand is being used to provide animation).
“Every time I hear this song I want to dance… two all beef patties, special sauce lettuce cheese pickles onions on a sesame seed bun…”
Puff, puff, pass is the rule even for you my little friend.
They might look better…but I’m still glad that they got rid of those substitute referrees!
Making movies in the US almost killed the poor guy, turns out those Quarter Pounders with cheese are DELICIOUS. Or as he calls them “a Royale with cheese”
Despite the Maria Menounos pics, I guess there is no direct correlation between Dancing With the Stars and an improved ass.
Kirstie Alley might disagree with you on that one.
Maybe it’s just an optical illusion, and all those women weigh only 23 pounds!
“OK agents, look alive…there’s black people moving in on Horndog…really, really black people”
His smirk is stuck in the on position. Must be painful.
And we have the new Dr. Frank-N-Furter for our Rocky Horror revival …
It’s the Spanish, good looking, Janeane Garofalo!
The crazy thing is she’s 7 months pregnant in this pic.
Stephen Moyer?
I thought this was a pic of Alicia Silverstone’s kid in 30 years.
“Why, no. I don’t believe that a niggah can get a table dance.”
MOO
Good for Billy… I’m glad he’s found work again as Dustin Hoffman’s security guard. Might want to dress more professionally though.
When I find my hammer…I am going to whack you!
“Da only reathon I wearin’ dith neck brathe ith becauthe I don’t want no vampireth gittin’ me. Le’my blood alone, vampireth!”
Couldn’t he have just found one of those “extenda-buttons” so his top button would close?
Honey, Mama’s tired of seeing your “O face.”
Pics like this make me hope and pray that her next boyfriend is a big black biker type who encourages her to get some big ass tattoos and make a sex tape.
Pics like this make me hope and pray that her next boyfriend is a Kennedy. Oh, wait
The weird thing is, no matter where you are in your room viewing this photo, the eyes never follow you.
I would like to personally invite all the girls of Our Lady of Sorrow 2017 graduating class to a party at my hotel room tonight.
They look sadly out of kilter here. This merits further investigation.
OK, that’s better.
AAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand I’m done.
Where’s Grace?
Arnold doesn’t look too bad…but I didn’t even recognize Sylvester Stallone without his toupee!
America’s Funniest Video moment in 3…2…1.
eh, who knew he still had enough money to buy good looking ‘companions’.
The name of the show; “El Hormiguero”; is that Spanish for “Interview Your Own Penis”?
Aren’t you a billionaire? Couldn’t you have afforded to buy a bike basket?
Sad thing is, I bet that wooden great cost him 7 grand.
Crate* Damn you autocorrect
Looks like she’s about to pull a Brigitte Nielsen.
hideous.
Obviously, Dorothy (In pink) had just thrown that small bucket of water on her. “You cursed brat! Look what you’ve done! I’m melting! melting! Oh, what a world! What a world! Who would have thought a good little girl like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness? Oooooh, look out! I’m going! Oooooh! Ooooooh!”
A poop bag for a baby? Haven’t they heard about diapers? Only in America, people!
This is what happens when you stop letting your mum dress you.