Welcome to another robust Monday edition of The Crap We Missed which admittedly starts off on a sour note (above), continues downhill from there, until finally ending in the gutter. So, sorry in advance for that. Sprinkled throughout, however, are a few bright spots, like Rutger Hauer: Dark Thief of Immortal Souls, Olivia Munn finally finding a room where she’s the least obnoxious person, Orlando Bloom wearing sweatpants tailor-made for Jon Hamm, and Kim Kardashian in her happy place.
Sally Field does not approve,
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“Does this one cover up all the bruises?”
The award was later taken away from Mr. Travolta when it was realized the recipient actually had to be living.
If I had to lift her fat, HEP-C body, I would shoot flames out my ass too.
I can see mother nature’s clock ticking on her ass and legs getting fat. Her ego is already bloated.
“I wonder what is happening in the Shire”.
I don’t think she’s gotten over the fact that Harry Potter killed Lord Voldermort.
What happens in a retirement home, stays in the retirement home.
Because matching shoes would so ruin this outfit.
They do match, the shoe on the right is just right in the sun.
Damn it, grandpa got out again! Someone fix his pants and take him back to the nursing home. It’s pudding day.
Hmmmmmmmm…looks like the only horseman missing is “War.”
That was Rutger Hauer.
Is there a man behind me writing his name in the mud?
RAWWWR!!
“Havin’ a baby…
What a lovely way to say,
I need more publicity.
Havin’ a baby…”
Well, I can’t say as I could resist the temptation to squeeze some firm, toned dancer ass either.
I don’t think they liked me.
An offer to play Scrooge in 3,2,1…
Feed me, Seymore, feed me now!
Anyone seen ‘Drop of Water’ in Mario Bava’s horror movie ‘Black Sabbath’?
“Nothing to see here, just writing my name on the concrete.”
Imagine the amount of Sanatogen, Dentugrip, Deep Heat, and Lubricant it would take to get that party going.
Polish a pornstar still a pornstar. Wait, I’d love to polish a pornstar!
I never remember…Is it vertical stripes or horizontal stripes that make you look thinner…ah yes, now I remember…vertical.
I guess Chris Brown only used his left this time round.
‘The 10th Annual Living Legends of Aviation Awards’…he got the Mile High award for finger fucking a masseuse at 12,000 feet.
Is Semen considered a performance enhancing drug?
Possibly the deadest smile I have ever seen.
First there was the saggy jean, then the skinny saggy jean. Now comes skinny Hammer Pants
Sarcastic ass in repose.
I honestly had no idea there was such a thing as grey makeup.
It’s actually touch-up paint for battle ships. Recently it was found it works on battle axes as well.
Pictured: Five testicles…you figure it out.
Jon Hamm he is not.
Olivia Munn looks every bit the $1,500 hooker she is. Sultry yet trashy at the same time But damn, I’d fuck the shit out of her. I feel conflicted just saying it.
Last known photo…
Epic fail, what did you expect from a Clinton.
Living Legends of Gayviation?
I’m a bit surprised he doesn’t ski ski ski.
Screw you, Superficial message board, for shifting my comment over one post so it doesn’t make sense.
That’s what you get for using arrow keys
I’m a bit surprised he doesn’t ski ski ski.
As long as she shows off her tits we are oko.
Her right butt pad is slipping
I would give both of my arms to tap that.
It’s like looking in a mirror. Everyone looking at her has the same expression. Shocking fear mixed with surprise.
High school art teacher
Long Island Housewife, circa 1987
Give me poncho back or I’ll eat the yung’un I will!
Is it weird that I’m still attracted to her based on how hot I think I remember she used to be?
I wouldn’t say so—that’s the key to marriage, isn’t it?
Can’t believe I’m going to be the first to say, “Wildenstein? More like Wildebeast”.
I’ve been looking at this picture for 5 minutes trying to write something only to realize I’ve forgotten to do that and just got lost in the beauty of this woman.
Crap they shouldn’t have framed the picture like that. She looks like a dwarf.
So just for the day we’re retitling the show “Eff You America”.
-”Hahaha yes I had her clean my trailer during breaks”
-”And then I sucked his dick”
Jim Toth is taking out his homosexual frustrations on her cheek.