The Crap We Missed – Monday 1.16.12

January 16th, 2012 // 554 Comments
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Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed featuring the time Grapemaster deduced Black Spider-Man’s secret identity, Gerard Butler hitting on what looks like Paris Hilton because apparently he wants to get this death thing over with rapido, Courtney Love being Courtney Love (Read: Drunk and full of barbituates.) and what happens immediately after having sex with Alexander Skarsgard. “The True Death,” if you will.

Wait. Should that last part have involved shoes?

- The Superficial

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Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Tobey Maguire
    Commented on this photo:

    Says here that every third person has to dress up like an Easter egg. Somebody better tell Nicolson.

  2. Gerard Butler
    Commented on this photo:

    If you sleep with me, you might get a crack at my will… Just kidding, please take a number.

  3. Alexander Skarsgard
    Commented on this photo:

    “Driver- can we stop at Home Depot for a shovel and a bag of lime?”

  4. Alexander Skarsgard
    Commented on this photo:

    “Tell me, does this smell like chloroform?”

  5. Courtney Love Drunk
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh my, Courtney out doing what she does best.

  6. Alexander Skarsgard
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    “Quick, to the hotel, the roofie has kicked in.”

  7. Kelly Rowland Butt Tight dress BET Honors
    Terry
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d suck that choco ass. MMMMM!!

  8. Orlando Bloom Son Flynn Baby Bjorn
    Commented on this photo:

    Is there room in that baby pouch for his masculinity?

  9. Ali Larter Art Of Elysium Gala
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    She really needs to lose more weight.

  10. Kat Von D Lemmy Kilmister Art Of Elysium Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    Wolverine: The Later Years.

  11. Jared Leto Scruffy Beard Hat Jacket
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like the unfunny emo version of Inspector Gadget…

  12. Larry King
    Commented on this photo:

    All that’s missing is a sign that says, “death, just take me.”

  13. Larry King
    moneyhoney
    Commented on this photo:

    probably still pondering that rough “which sister?” decision he had to make. That was one tough year, age 115…

  14. Marcus Collins Ian McKellen
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess he’s looking for variety after plundering the entire male population in the shire…

  15. Jack Black Crown Cape Septor
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like every other teenage douchebag who puts on a Burger King crown and thinks its funny.

  16. Jessica-Jane Clement Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    JWoww 2.0?

  17. Larry King
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Every photo makes him look like he is really angry about something.

    • Casandra

      I think his dental work must hurt him, and that’s why he always makes those hateful faces at everyone.

  18. Paz Vega Art Of Elysium Gala
    moneyhoney
    Commented on this photo:

    Does her name mean “peace”? Because that left nipple looks like it’s ready for war.

  19. Jared Leto Scruffy Beard Hat Jacket
    Commented on this photo:

    Nothing skips over the redundancy of lacing up ones boots like a cute side zipper.

  20. Tobey Maguire
    LegMan
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that Harvey Firestein next to him?

  21. Courtney Love Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    The dude is a master: he stops her from falling over and yet keeps her at arm’s length at the same time.

  22. Jessica-Jane Clement Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    That pattern is so mesmerizing… If you look at it for 20 minutes, you’ll eventually notice she has red hair.

  23. Jared Leto Scruffy Beard Hat Jacket
    moneyhoney
    Commented on this photo:

    Look! Zac Efron grew a beard!

  24. Rose McGowan Middle Finger
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess she told that Toyota salesman what she thinks of the test drive.

  25. Kim Kardashian Cleavage
    TomSelleck'sMustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Ms. Kardashian, how did you make it past security?

  26. Morgan Freeman Jeremy Irons Golden Globes
    Commented on this photo:

    Tell me Morgan! Tell me how you got away with banging your granddaughter! TELL ME!!

  27. Rumer Willis Demi Moore
    Commented on this photo:

    Rumer: Derp Derp deerp?

    Demi: Derp Der Derp!

  28. Courtney Love Drunk
    Any Guy
    Commented on this photo:

    just DIE you worthless SKANK.

  29. Rose McGowan Middle Finger
    moneyhoney
    Commented on this photo:

    Look paparazzi – to distract from my face, take a picture of my rheumatoid arthritis!

  30. Ali Larter Art Of Elysium Gala
    LegMan
    Commented on this photo:

    My, my, my!

  31. Rose McGowan Middle Finger
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    I really hate it when people cannot give the middle finger properly. You are supposed to raise that middle one HIGH, not act like you are suffering from arthritis.

    • Looks like she learned how to give the finger by looking at an illustration.

    • I think she learned how to give the finger from Geena Davis in “Fletch.”

    • I think this is actually an east coast/west coast phenomenon. I’m from the east, where we actually give you the singular finger, but when I moved to LA I saw one of my friends demonstrate the same digital spazz attack as McGowan and nearly killed myself laughing. If you really, really wanna look like Verbal Kint when you flip someone off, this is how you should roll.

  32. Eva Longoria No Make Up
    Commented on this photo:

    Day job: Motel maid.

  33. Thomas Jane
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s an outfit that cries out for a feather boa.

  34. Kat Von D Lemmy Kilmister Art Of Elysium Gala
    Any Guy
    Commented on this photo:

    I can just hear Lemmy whispering in that dude’s ear “so who thinks I’ve got the bigger cock, luv?”

  35. Eva Longoria No Make Up
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, that’s another one crossed off my “fapping list”.

  36. Eric Stonestreet Ty Burrell Golden Globes
    Commented on this photo:

    No. I don’t see any – oh wait – yup.

  37. Eric Stonestreet Ty Burrell Golden Globes
    moneyhoney
    Commented on this photo:

    Yum…you look like bacon. My publicist won’t let me eat any. Can I lick your face?

  38. Kelly Rowland Butt Tight dress BET Honors
    LegMan
    Commented on this photo:

    Anyone up for ride on that caboose?

  39. Jessica-Jane Clement Cleavage
    moneyhoney
    Commented on this photo:

    Member of the saggy, sh*tty titty committee.

  40. Morgan Freeman Jeremy Irons Golden Globes
    Commented on this photo:

    “You’re right. You would look younger with an eye lift.”

  41. Jennifer Hudson No Make Up
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow. All I can say is whoever does her makeup deserved the Oscar.

  42. Melanie Griffith Antonio Banderas Golden Globes
    moneyhoney
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s as far as the plastic stretches until she just falls back.

  43. Brendan Gleeson, Michael Fassbender
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    One can’t find his penis and the other keeps tripping over his.

  44. Wendi McLendon Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Does she rent out her forehead to advertisers?

  45. Rumer Willis Demi Moore
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess I can see where the chin came from.

  46. Lara Stone Bikini Buttcrack David Walliams
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    “Are you sure it’s still in there ? I thought they were all connected on that string. I remember counting six of them when I pulled it out.”

  47. Kim Kardashian Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    “Who am I wearing, Ryan? Why the goo of every man between here and my limo, that’s who I’m wearing.”

  48. Thomas Jane
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    Ok, is this guy going through chemo or just being a douchebag ?

  49. Tobey Maguire
    SSHGuru
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like an angry grape.

  50. Gerard Butler
    Commented on this photo:

    Who let those two zombies into the party?

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