Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed, which signals our end of day, so you can suck it West Coast! Completely fabricated coastal rivalries aside, we’d love for you all to enjoy this smattering of random, starting with the pants that drugs painted, as well as Larry King, who wants that telegraph sent by sundown or nobody gets their nickel raise, Tulisa Contostavlos, whose breasts don’t lie, and finally, the great Sam Waterston who is way too drunk for has no patience for crappy red carpet banter.
Phew, thank goodness Brooke Mueller‘s finally clean. I mean, if she was still high as shit, she’d probably be trying to hock shitty, homemade jewelry somewhe– Wait,
- Photo Boy
Click Here To Start The Gallery
Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Spalsh News, WENN
Obviously, in her language “K-Mart” doesn’t mean “crappy store that no decent girl would ever go into”
“There’s this guy, see. He takes a trip to Europe. It’s his first vacation in a long time. Sees the sights, you know? He has a real good time. Anyway, after a while he decides to call home. He gets his brother on the phone, and the guy says to his brother, ‘How’s everything at home?’ And his brother says, ‘Your…your cat died.’ And the guy says to his brother, ‘You shouldn’t tell me bad news like that. You should break it to me gently. You know, like, you should say something like, “The cat crawled out on the roof…and…chasing squirrels…and…got stuck. We had to call the fire department…and when they finally got there…the fireman crawled up, he grabbed the cat, but on the way down he slipped and the cat…fell to the ground. And, they had to take the cat to the vet. They tried to save the cat…even operated…on the cat. But it was too late. The–they couldn’t…save the cat.” That’s how you should break bad news like that.’ So the guy says to his brother… ‘How’s Mom?’ And the brother says…’She’s on the roof.’ “
Jesus Christ this is bad. I’m going to create17 more screen names so I can give it more thumbs down.
“Mila, look! I’ve gotten my shit together! Let’s go out again!”
No, no.
Needs an Enema of the Poophole.
Curse you for beating me to that!
“Yes, I’m lost again. No, I don’t know who you are, but I don’t know how to call anyone else on this phone. Now I pooped myself.”
Chapter One: I got fake boobs.
Chapter Two: I wrote this book.
The End
Since I get all of my knowledge from this site, I’ve determined that Pippa Middleton has no front.
“Hey Fucker the end of the line is back there”
“I’m Matt Smith!”
“Who? We’re all hungry dick!”
Sadly, even though she’s obviously homeless, it’s still a huge step up from being Mrs. Charlie Sheen.
I dunno. She’s making Charlie look pretty darn good right now!
That reminds me, I need to re-upholster my cow, er, couch.
I’ll still do her, but I would need her to wear the Hillary Duff mask from 2005. FYI, that’s when she just turned 18.
Why is Joe Rogan bothering that guy?
Looks like Kim finally duped him into giving her oral sex.
Idk how she does it. One day she’s black, the next day she’s Oompa Loompa orange.
I don’t know who she is, but everything about her is too much.
“This biography of Tulisa came out awfully quickly. It’s not even about her!”
“Sure it is! Look at the cover.”
“But inside it’s mostly about Ross Perot, and the last two chapters are excerpts from the Oliver North trial!”
Off to my first day of work as a production assistant!
I think someone distorted that picture.
I think you’re right. Could her kidney transplant in April is cause some bloating problems? ‘Cuz she really is a darling…
http://www.ceriseco.com.au/blog/sarah-hyland-50-carat-diamond-south-sea-pearl-necklace-at-golden-globes-2011/
I don’t know what the problem is with this photo upload utility. Sometimes it works just fine and other times it spits out an error message saying Invalid Referrer.” Frustrating…
[img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/29/Sarah-Hyland-340_493.jpg[/img]
AHA! Success at last!
I think the makers of RID give you that hat to wear til your head heals up.
Ribbit.
Is her last name, Willis ?
Proof that becoming the young star of a major film franchise before you’ve established yourself as an actor does not necessarily mean that your career will end with the franchise.
Oh wait, no….the opposite of that.
waaahhh wahhh! thiis purse is too heavy, someone help me *sob*
Hey, asshole, you think you’re so much better than me because you don’t poop in *your* phone booth?
She’s getting a real head start on Halloween. I’m loving the wax Dracula teeth.
I never thought I could see a picture slur itself.
Why do I get the feeling she was thrown out of her apartment, and these are the last of her possessions?
The most horrible thing Eli Roth ever did was come to Hollywood.
Ohhh, there’s just one…more…thing.
Your move, Trebek!
Whoever does her hair extensions they are a master at the art.
The man in the red’s really a cardboard cut-out he carries with him to look like he’s got friends.
Sarah looks darling except for her teeth. Heavy smoking will yellow them very fast. She should get them cleaned at least once a month. Or just quit smoking!
Geez, can’t I go to *one* K-mart where there are no hispanics?
He was actually good in “Jumper”. His wooden acting in Star Wars matched George Lucas’ wooden dialog.
He’s been painting, I see. Well, either that or rolling around in a filthy dumpster.
I’m going to go with painting.
Yes. Let’s give him the benefit of the doubt. For his sake.
He’s dumpster painting……it’s all the new rage.
“No, I’m not auditioning for a new Companion and NO, you may not sleep in the TARDIS!”
However much you may hate that woman, you gotta love that hat.
He’s interviewing the voices in Amanda Bynes head.
“Yew want a whippin’? Yew want a whippin’? Alriiiight aaaaahm gonna give yew a WHIPPIN’!”
*takes belt off, pants fall down*
“Goldang it….”
Smooth move, Krusty.
I meant Sideshow Bob…
Goldang it…
Which one’s Matt Smith? I think you’re just making up names, places, and people.
You did put up the posters, right? And are you sure they said 6 p.m.?
She looks expensive.
I thought that was Lindsay Lohan but she hasn’t looked that good in a while.
Hey, I thought planking was out of fashion!
“What’choo talkin’ ’bout Willis?”
I saw there was a line and thought I would just show up and be pretty.
Somewhere there is a 68 Oldsmobile missing its seat covers.
Successful and highly wealthy rock star.
Could have any women he desires.
Instead dates a baldy and gets engaged to a fat ass.
Lay off the drugs.